Comedy

The 15 Best One-Liners of Louis C.K.

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15. There's a reason it's called 'girls gone wild' and not 'women gone wild'. When girls go wild, they show their tits. When women go wild, they kill men and drown their kids in a tub.

14. Every day starts, my eyes open, and I reload the program of misery. I open my eyes remember who I am, what I'm like, and I just go "ugh...."

13. I don't have a gun, but if I did, I would shoot a baby deer in the mouth and feel nothing.

12. A man will rip off your arm and throw it into a river, but he will leave you as a human being intact. He won't mess with who you are. Women are non-violent but they will shit inside of your heart.

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Brenna Ruppert
Contact: Brenna Ruppert