The Forever Lazy, aka The Forever Unlaid

Don't you just want to peel that giant ball of anti-pill polar fleece off of your hot date?

Didn't think so.

The Forever Lazy, aka the knockoff snuggie with a shit flap, can be boiled down to three major issues -- all of which will prevent you from ever having sex (again).

1. That hoodie makes you look like an overstuffed hipster with a giant zipper up the front.

2. You're wearing something that has hatches in the front and back that the creators say are perfect for "Great Escapes When Duty Calls" -- and no, that's not a video game.

3. That shit only comes in three colors.

The sleeping bag with legs and feet holes can be purchased for a cool $29.95 (plus $7.95 S&H), and comes in sizes that "fit the whole family," which would explain why it looks like you have an extra arm coming out of your crotch. Or were you just happy to see me?

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Claire Lawton
Contact: Claire Lawton