The Seven Saddest Costumed Pets on Etsy

The life of a domesticated animal may seem like one of total bliss, but that ain't always the case. While it's true that most pets are fed, groomed, and tended to by their owners (the responsible one, at least), they're often subject to the various whims and emotional mood-swings of their care-givers.

Halloween is the worst time of year for most of these pets who suffer the indignity of wearing a weird, awkward, or uncomfortable costume, carefully crafted on Esty

Pity the sad-eyed critters that had to model these outfits while you check out our rundown of Halloween weirdness. 

6. Native American Dachshund
You're only a construction worker, cop, and biker short of having your own four-legged version of the Village People.


5. Hot Dog Costume
The scourge of toy dogs everywhere, this outfit is popular amongst owners, but not necessarily the poor canines that have to wear the damn thing. 

4. Guinea Pig Wizard
It's bad enough that these jittery rodents have to live in claustrophobic glass boxes filled with a fragrant potpourri of sawdust and their own filth. Must you add to their torture by dressing them up as Gandalf?

3. Chihuahua Sombreo

We thank you kindly for reinforcing racial stereotypes. 

2. Hollywood Hustler Cat
Pimpin' ain't easy, especially if you're this unfortunate feline dressed in this goofy outfit. If fact, it probably will have a few, uh..."treats" to deposit in its owners shoes after getting done working the street corner.

1. Doggie Boob Scarf

Giving your pug a pair of jugs is utterly wrong on so many levels.

Follow Jackalope Ranch on Facebook and Twitter.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.