In today's example of "Oh crap, it's Earth Day, I better pretend like I care," we bring you the wearable planter.

The necklace, complete with an Earth-friendly leather cord, porcelain pot, and thousands of microscopic bugs living in a dirty plant around your neck, is a perfect way to introduce yourself to strangers as:

1. the crazy woman who wears plants,
2. the lady who's always spitting into that green thing around her neck, or
3. the lady who has the best secret drug-stashing spot we've ever seen.

The Wearable Planter: For When You Have to Take the Earth with You

The necklace, like everything on Earth day, is expensive and full of hype at a cool $55.

But don't worry, it'll totally even out when you start harvesting and selling your very own pinch-size supply of "medical" marijuana to the moms down the street.

Our advice: next time you want a plant, just plant one (indoor or outdoor), on a stable surface with access to sunlight and regular water. Then, give yourself a big pat on the back (hell, Tweet about it), because you friend, love the Earth.

Follow Jackalope Ranch on Facebook and Twitter.

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