We couldn't resist a $200 Armani suit at a local clearance shop, even if it was two sizes too big. Finding a tailor willing to fix this fashion find was another matter altogether. But George Nicolopoulos, owner and proprietor of Thomas Family Cleaners and Tailors, was happy to rip apart our new eveningwear and make it fit our frame.

The bill George presented was surprisingly small -- about $30 -- and big helpings of warm chatter from wife Kathy made the experience all the more delightful. So much so that we hauled in a pile of pants that needed letting out and an old soup-stained quilt. All were returned to us good-as-new in a matter of days.

What really makes Albertsons your store?

It's the zeal in which it displays those marginal items that hang off the shelves in the middle or end of an aisle, things like big salad forks or ice cream scoopers that can't sit on a shelf. Whoever is in charge of this unique product placement should be commended, at least by Happy Tooth, for placing Reach toothbrushes right next to the boxes of couscous and dental floss dispensers beside Millstone Golden Oats.

But why is a value pack of balloons hanging near the tomato juice? (Is there some sick fraternity gag we don't know about where you have to feign busting a gut in front of impressionable children?)

If you were to play word association, you'd never come up with some of these mental links in a million years. You say "Kellogg's Corn Pops" and he says, "Aaah, you want Baby Wipes." You say "Nutra Grain Bars" and he says, "Might I suggest a monkey-shaped cereal dish with a straw coming out?"

We can appreciate why cheerleader pompoms hang near the cupcake section, but we don't think we even want to know why there's Ozium Pocket Sized Air Sanitizer Spray over the canned Fish Steak. This just can't be good for sales!

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