Wanted in Sun City: Breast Specialists

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image courtesy of USDA (no, really)

Who knew you needed a degree for this?

Couldn't help myself with this one. Did you know they need "lactation consultants" in Sun City? One would've thought the wrinkled dugs up there would be as dry as a parson. And who knew there was such a position to begin with? Do women really need instructions on breast-feeding? Haven't they been doing it since the dawn of (wo)man? I mean, animals do it, for Chrissakes! But, I happened to see this ad from MedHunters.com while looking over the Business Journal of Phoenix online. Here's a little sample of what it takes to offer advice on nay-nay milk:

This position is responsible for providing professional breastfeeding consultations and services to both inpatients and outpatients and for providing continuing education about breastfeeding to healthcare providers. This position conducts the Breastfeeding Support Network meetings at DEWMH and teaches the lactation component of Sun Health's community education courses. This position will assume the lead in developing a lactation store. This position provides service to patients/residents found within the scope of services. Bachelor's Degree in nursing, health education or related field or equivalent combination of education, training and experience. Current certification by the International Board of Lactation Consultant Examiners (IBLCE), which entitles position to use the designation IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant).

"Lactation store"? Nutty. Well, I may not be certified by the "International Board of Lactation Consultant Examiners," nevertheless, I do a helluva lot of (cough) volunteer work with unwed mothers, and am willing to make my services available to Sun City residents at a reduced rate for all moms, former moms, and those considering motherhood under the age of 80.