American Horror Story is meant to be scary and often succeeds in being so, but like any good horror movie, it shows a fair amount of sex between the scares. Recurring cast members Dylan McDermott, Lily Rabe, and Evan Peters all get in on the action time and time again, while single-use cast members like Lizzie Brochere and Chloe Sevigny spice it up in just one season. It's hard to classify these scenes as solely sexy, because usually something goes horribly wrong right after. If you haven't watched the show, know that this list has some sassy spoilers. You've been warned.
Moira the Maid Cleans Up
Moira, the mysterious maid who "came with the house" establishes herself pretty quickly in the first season as the main source of sexiness in the show. Her constant advances aimed at the married man of the house, played by McDermott, become more and more intense as the season goes on.
The Twist: She's unsolicitedly cleaning the blood of Ben's ex-lover after he murdered her.
Sister Mary Eunice Gets Seductive
After finding red lingerie in the head nun's dresser drawer, Mary decides to do a little dance and sing Lesley Gore's "You Don't Own Me." While there isn't any sex per se in this scene, the sacrilege and sudden sense of empowerment and sexuality is pretty cool. You're sure to have that song stuck in your head for a week after watching it.
The Twist: She's possessed by Satan, thus the sudden affinity for stolen red lingerie.
Kit and Alma Get Busy
One of the few actually sweet and somewhat romantic sex scenes in this show goes to secretly married, scandalously biracial couple Kit and Alma. The world around them hates them for their love, but they're so into each other that they don't care.
The Twist: She's abducted by aliens (yes, aliens) shortly thereafter.
Shelley's A Total Nympho
Pretty much any time Shelley opens her mouth in Asylum it's to say something either highly sexual or straight-up depressing. It's hard to say which one you'll get when, but there's plenty of boning to go around with her in the asylum.
The Twist: All that boning got her thrown in a mental institution. The Twist on that twist: It resulted in a cooler, crazy-lady half-shaved head hairdo.
Vivian Harmon's Self-Love
Cheating husband got you down? Don't worry. Just follow Vivian's lead and give yourself some love. Who needs men anyway?
The Twist: She stops halfway through because of a terrible flashback.
Oodles of Witchy Sex
There's no doubt that Coven will be a sexy and spooky goldmine. Already we've seen Sarah Paulson as Cordelia getting some tail in the middle of a flaming pentagram surrounded by rapidly hatching and growing serpents.
The Twist: There is no twist. Sex in the middle of a flaming pentagram with rapidly hatching and growing serpents.
Moira's Sex Swing Romp
Um. It's a scene where Moira is in a sex swing. Does that really need an explanation?
The Twist: She totally ends up killing this guy, but not before going all Lorena Bobbitt on his junk with her teeth.
Honeymooning at an Abandoned Asylum
Adam Levine's acting debut found him ripping his clothes off and taking Channing Tatum's wife to funky town in the then-abandoned Briarcliff Asylum. Safety and cleanliness be dammed.
The Twist: He gets his arm torn or ripped or sliced off about two minutes later.
Moira and the Black Dahlia
In the millionth attempt to lure Ben Harmon to cheat on his wife, Moira enlists the help of the Black Dahlia for some irresistible girl on girl action. Somehow he resists, but he does watch for quite a while.
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The Twist: They're both ghosts.
Kit and Grace in the Kitchen
After both getting dealt a bad hand and being institutionalized despite being sane people, Kit and Grace form a strong bond built on trust, honesty, strength and getting busy in the asylum's kitchen when no one's around. What more could you ask for in a relationship?
The Twist: They get caught and nearly sterilized. Then Grace ends up getting pregnant and then, you guessed it... abducted by aliens (yes, aliens again).