An inmate at the Arizona State Prison in Tucson has filed a federal lawsuit against himself, claiming he has violated two of his own constitutional rights.
The lawsuit filed Monday by Levi Moses alleges that he violated his own religious rights by not being aware of the Holy Bible, and that he subjected himself to cruel and unusual punishment by landing himself in prison.
Moses is about 4 1/2 years into a 16-year sentence for second-degree murder and transportation theft, and has quite a history of disciplinary infractions since landing in prison in 2008, according to Arizona Department of Corrections records.
Due to these alleged constitutional violations, Moses says in the lawsuit that he "want[s]/need[s]" to live outdoors, and notes that he would like to speak to a judge -- "any judge" in person about the matter.
After a full page detailing his interpretation of the Bible, Moses explains, "I did not give my self enough knowledge of The Holy Bible, procrastinated."
Moses labeled this section as an "exercise of religion" issue, and says that issues such as not being familiar with the Good Book "delayed me from pursuing my rights."
Although it's not really coherent, Moses sums it up by saying this violation prevented him from living outside of a prison cell.
His other issue, related to "torture," Moses explains that he "abused [him]self."
"I am still continuously being tortured," he writes.
We're not legal experts, but we'll assume that this lawsuit has already found its way to the garbage can. If you'd like to attempt to make any more sense of it, you can find a copy of it below.