Feathered Bastard

Christine Jones Made Money from Porn, Was Pro­-SOPA, and Forgives Sheriff Paul Babeu's Sex­capades

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Anyway, when I arrived at the gun shop, there Jones stood before a wall of AR­-15s with a group of about 20 or so, all of whom wanted to kvetch about illegal immigration.

The funniest was one guy with a heavy foreign accent saying that he came here the right way and that all those illegal rugrats should be shipped back home, no exceptions.

Ah, America -- where even immigrants can be anti-­immigrant.

My turn came, and I asked Jones where the heck she was gonna get that $270 million her border plan was supposed to cost.

She gave me some shuck-­and-­jive about how her plan would pay for itself in the long run.

But in the short run, where does the cash come from, considering the state's budget?

"In your budget session . . . you make that your highest priority," she told me. "You start with the things that really matter to you. [Then] you're going to be left with stuff that's going to fall off the table that you're not going to pay for. It's going to be painful, but I'm just telling you at the moment that we cannot afford not to do it."

She claimed there were "huge pickups" that the state could make in "efficiency" because of "duplicating spending."

Still, what would she cut to get the $270 million?

"Some of it is going to have to come out of the state agencies that have a bunch of middle management," she said.

Not through layoffs. But through "technology solutions" and normal attrition.

"I'm going to look like a complete genius," she promised, "because it's not very hard."

Whew, that's a load off my mind.

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Stephen is a former staff writer and columnist at Phoenix New Times.
Contact: Stephen Lemons