By Stephen Lemons
Nappy defends prejudiced polecat Russell Pearce, plans to bore Dems at convention. Nickel Bag Joe persecutes Hispanics in the East Valley. Satan keeping Joe's spot in Hell warm. Buckeye pool closed by nasty crypto bug. D-Backs done-in by Rockies. Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie will probably play in KC, according to Coach W. Hold the mayo: Whites to be minority by 2042. D.L. Hughley's in town. Julia Child, WWII spy? Eight hundred pot plants confiscated in Gilbert. Cops go on 7-11 run for Funyuns, water.