It's a shame Senator John McCain lost the 2008 presidential election. If he'd won he would have the power to grant a pardon to a certain 4-foot-9 "guidette" whose perpetual orange hue "The Maverick" finds "too good looking" for jail.
The "guidette" that seems to have caught McCain's eye is none other than "Snooki," of Jersey Shore shame.
McCain was on KMLE this morning when the issue of "Snooki," a.k.a. Nicole Polizzi, came up, and the silver medalist in the 2008 presidential election said the following: "I kind of think she might be too good looking to go to jail."
"Snooki" is "too" a lot of things, "good looking" is not one of them.
"The Maverick" was referring to the "Snookster's" recent arrest for disorderly conduct in Seaside Heights, New Jersey.
It's not entirely clear why Snooki was arrested, but she was seen taking body shots at a nearby bar prior to the arrest. Check out some video here.
McCain and "Snooki's" paths crossed once before when earlier this year "Snooki" took to Twitter to whine about taxes placed on tanning.
"I don't go to tanning beds anymore because Obama put a 10-percent tax on tanning," she "tweeted" back in June. "I feel like he did that intentionally for us."
McCain responded to the complaint with a "tweet" of his own.
"@Snooki u r right, I would never tax your tanning bed! Pres Obama's tax/spend policy is quite The Situation. but I do rec wearing sunscreen!" the senator "tweeted.
"If you notice "The Situation" in caps -- and you're one of the few people in the country unaware that abdominal muscles are now referred to as "situations" -- it's in reference to another member of the Jersey Shore cast, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino, whose chiseled abs landed him some of the sloppiest women New Jersey has to offer.
We contacted McCain's campaign spokesman, Brian Rogers to see if "gym...tan...laundry" appeared anywhere on the senator's campaign schedule. He never got back to us.