On the way out, he gives me the best advice any doctor has so far.
"There will be a result you're happy with," he says. "As long as you're realistic about your expectations."
Driving home, the words "realistic expectations" continue to ring in my ears.
Is any part of this lifestyle realistic? Is it realistic to expect that bigger breasts or thinner thighs will change your life? Is it realistic to care about local celebrity status as much as Nik Richie says so many people in Scottsdale do?
We are so obsessed with image. I've actually seen signs that ask, "Got Botox?" A recent article in the New York Times Magazine talked about a new technology that would allow parents to genetically engineer a skinnier baby.
That freaks me out. Yet, I have to admit, if I had the spare $510, I'd probably have booked a Restylane injection already. And when you break it down, I guess that makes me the same as the breast-augmentation girls, and the women who get tummy tucks. It's all vanity, no matter how noninvasive the procedure is.
I recently saw Cedric the Entertainer on TV, talking about the same thing.
"People are getting this shit done just because they can," he said. "They're getting their eyebrows rotated. It's like a human Pimp My Ride."
I know he was making a joke, but he speaks the truth.