Listen, money doesn't grow on trees. Nor does it grow on cacti.
If you want more ways to save a buck or two around Phoenix, we've got 10 methods to do so:
10.) Go to the Library
You're not a real cheapskate if we have to tell you to go to the library. Real cheapskates don't need Netflix.
9.) Take a Walk
Remember that walking, whether it be around downtown, Roosevelt Row, a mall, or a city park, doesn't cost a dime. Bring your own water, obviously.
8.) Head to the Great Outdoors
You can take a hike up South Mountain, Camelback Mountain, or even head out of town through the Tonto National Forest, all for free.
7.) Watch Diamondbacks Games for $0.86 Each
Cable TV? What are you, rich? Sports fans always think they'll miss all the games without cable, but that's not true. For example, with baseball, you can buy the streaming service MLB.TV for $109.99. Games in your market are blacked out, so in theory, you could pay $4.99 a month for a service that bypasses that rule.
For a Diamondbacks season, it works out to paying $0.86 per game. To get most of the D-backs games on TV through Cox, you'd have to pay a minimum of $839.88 a year, or $5.18 per game (yes, you get other channels too).
Also, listening to the D-backs, Coyotes, Suns, and Cardinals on the radio is free.
6.) Remember Radio Stations Still Give Away Free Concert Tickets
Remember radio stations? Well, they still exist, and they still give away concert tickets. It's really not that hard to win some tickets, as they do more than just "be the nth caller" giveaways.
5.) Utilize the Light Rail
There's only one way to ride the light rail for free -- unless you want to risk that no one's going to ask to see your ticket -- and that's to have a ticket to any event at U.S. Airways Center. (Here's the cheapskate trifecta: Win concert tickets, park your car for free at a light rail park-and-ride, and get a free ride to the concert at U.S. Airways Center.)
Well, there is another way to ride for free, and it involves not buying a ticket and hoping you don't get caught.
4.) Hit Up Museums
A lot of museums around Phoenix are free. If not, there might be a certain day or night of the week they do let in people for free. Look into it.
3.) Get a Culture Pass
The Culture Pass is something you can get from the library for free, and it lets you get in certain places -- for free. That includes several museums, the Phoenix Zoo, and the Arizona Science Center, among other things.
2.) Find Free Food and Events
Is this a shameless plug for my co-workers? Yes. But when there's a way to get free food or a free event, our food and culture blogs, Chow Bella and Jackalope Ranch, are always on top of it.
1.) Never Pay for Parking Downtown
I can remember two occasions that I've paid a parking meter in Phoenix, and that's two times too many. Phoenix is a great place to avoid paying for parking, compared to other cities. First of all, for the time being, you don't have to pay a meter during nights or weekends.
Next, here's the easiest way to find a place to park without a meter: Look at the map of parking meters, and park a block away from the last one. Simple enough.
The same goes for special events, where people are charging $20 to park in some lot. Go to the next block, and it's free.
The other option is to find the little gems of parking lots in the middle of the city. Here's one at Fifth Avenue, near Jefferson Street:
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Follow Valley Fever on Twitter at @ValleyFeverPHX.
Follow Matthew Hendley at @MatthewHendley.
