Feathered Bastard

KTAR Lip-Flapper Darrell Ankarlo: Photo Enforcement Scofflaw and "Illegal"

Wonder if Ankarlo's new "speed camera mask" matches his 'tarded helmet?

Look, life is short. Too short to pay any more attention than necessary to wing-nut saliva jockey Darrell Ankkkarlo on KTAR 92.3 FM, winner of this year's Best of Phoenix "Best Bigot" award. This wannabe Archie Bunker gets off on bashing brown folk, and after blasting him a few times in print, listening to his annoying voice kvetch about illegals got old for me. Real old. Jesus, I think I even prefer listening to Sean freakin' Hannity!

But people have been telling me lately that Ankarlo and I do agree on one topic: photo enforcement. He hates it, and so do I. In fact in recent radio shows and in a monthly column he has with Phoenix Magazine, he has encouraged motorists to resist the Redflex giant by almost any means necessary. His latest scheme is a half-serious, half-joking proposal that drivers wear a jumbo visor like the one above, to obscure their faces from the cameras. See, if the pic they snap is not of you, you can send the ticket back to them and tell them to shove it. That's what Pinal County Sheriff Paul Babeu did to one of his Redlfex tickets, when the driver was obviously not him. The citation went away, and Babeu went on to single-handedly end the Redflex contract with Pinal.

But what makes Ankarlo full of pigeon poopy on this issue is that he is otherwise Mr. Dudley Do-Right, Mr. Christian, Mr. Obey the Law. Yet, when the law's not to his liking, he encourages folks to disobey it.

When the law is aimed at those who have crossed the desert and risked their lives for a chance to earn some green, often through back-breaking work at which ofays in this country turn their noses up, Ankarlo's ready to throw not only the book, but the whole library at 'em.

Entering the U.S. illegally is akin to a federal misdemeanor, with a possible fine of anywhere from $50 to $250, and up to 6 months in jail, under certain circumstances. (You can see the law, here.) In reality, first time around, many of the undocumented are offered a voluntary removal. If they take it, and there are no outstanding state charges, they're on a bus to Nogales pronto.

So how is that way worse than some idgit like Ankarlo wanting to leadfoot it to work in the morning, risking the lives and limbs of others as he does so? In one show, Ankarlo admitted that he's gotten a Redflex ticket, but is ignoring it. That means he and an undocumented person have something in common. They're both, um, "illegal." I mean, if you're gonna call Jose an illegal because, say, he doesn't have the proper paperwork, then we should call Ankarlo an illegal because he likes to treat the 51 like a drag strip, and thumb his nose at the law. 

As for Ankar-low-brow's green visor above, I'll give him points for it despite his hypocrisy. Moreover, I'm sure law-breakers other than speed-demons could make use of it. Graffiti artists could wear it to shield themselves from Metro Light Rail's security cameras. (That's one I like.) Bank robbers could don it to rip off their local Wells Fargo. And heck, rapists and murderers could also use it to shield their identities. And when they're all back at their pads, enjoying a cold one, know who they can thank for helping them evade justice?

You got it: Herman Munster-lookalike, Darrell Ankarlo.