Nativist Nimrod and birther nutbar John Philip Sousa IV slays me with his whole, "Guess who my great-grandpappy was?" song and dance, which he uses to sell his lame book about the original John Philip Sousa, shill for racist organizations like the Federation for American Immigration Reform, and pimp for Maricopa County's High Pooh-Bah of Hard Arteries, our despised Depends-wearin' despot, Sheriff Joe Arpaio.
Check out a pic ofSousa, and you'll see a massive dork who's spent his entire life pushing paper for the financial industry, a fella with the personality of a tongue-depressor and all the charm of that weasel Lumbergh from Office Space.
A talentless, middle-aged, pear-shaped cipher, JPS IV may be, but he knows how to make a buck while boosting our bumbling, clodhopper sheriff.
What, you didn't think Sousa did all that shuckin' and jivin' for Joe without taking his cut, did ya?