Seriously, folks, TLC's new cooking show, Inedible to Incredible, is like a recipe for couples counseling.
• Take married dudes who don't have the balls communication skills to tell their wives their cooking stinks and can't (or won't) cook a meal themselves and then get them to lie to their spouses, explaining that the cooking video they're making of them is for a new TV show.
• Send lie-video-whiny-gram to Beau Bridges-haircut chef John Besh.
• Do-the-dirty-work Besh shows up in a public place to humiliate their spouses, calling out their horrible cooking as can't-communicate husbands lurk and smirk.
That part's bad enough. Then there's the "fix."
Besh spends two days with the wives, transforming their worst dishes into delicious meals that are sampled at the end of the show and don't get a thumbs-up unless they're approved by the husbands who found it necessary to embarrass their spouses on TV.
Billed as the What Not to Wear of the food world (it's not), Inedible to Incredible is more How Not to Treat Your Spouse -- or any other human being, for that matter. Serving as a thinly veiled "John Besh to the rescue," the show does little in the way of demonstrating overall cooking skills, eating right, or food know-how.
Now here's this week's foodie TV schedule so you won't miss a thing. For cable channels, check your local listings.
Tuesday (July 6)
Hell's Kitchen: The chefs discover that naming flavors isn't easy when they take a blind taste test; and at the episode's first dinner service, they must devise their own menus. Then one ingredient trips up contestants before Chef Ramsay combines the teams for the second dinner service -- at the Hell's Kitchen dinner theater. 7 p.m., Channel 10, Fox
Cupcake Wars: "Survival of the Fittest." Bakers compete to have their sweets displayed in a Los Angeles museum. 9 p.m., Food Network
Chopped: "Crunch Time." Shredded-wheat crackers and potato chips are among the featured ingredients. 10 p.m., Food Network
Wednesday (July 7)
Man v. Food: "Salt Lake City." Adam visits Kobe Sushi in Salt Lake City and attempts the "Hell Fire Challenge," a six-piece spicy tuna roll made with hot kaiware sprouts, jalapeño peppers, and a concentrated paste made with four of the world's hottest peppers. Other stops include Crown Burgers and Bruges Waffles & Fries. 9 p.m., Travel Channel
Top Chef: Washington, D.C.: "Room Service." The food fighters must whip up baby food for host Padma Lakshmi's newborn infant. Then they are split into teams of two to create room-service breakfast, lunch, and dinner for discerning hotel guests. Appearing: former contestants Bryan Voltaggio, Michael Isabella, and Spike Mendelsohn. Restaurant-concepts maven Beth Scott and organic foods chef Nora Pouillon are the guest judges. 9 p.m., Bravo
Dinner: Impossible: "Spring Training Tangle." Robert heads to Clearwater, Florida, home of the Philadelphia Phillies' spring training camp, and prepares a meal for 200 baseball players using major- and minor-league ingredients. 10 p.m., Food Network
Thursday (July 8)
Good Eats: "American Classic Viii: Tacos." Tacos are made. 8:30 p.m., Food Network
Ace of Cakes: "Miami Meltdown." Duff builds his tallest cake ever, which is modeled after an Egyptian pharaoh, and transporting it proves to be a huge challenge. Later, Duff and Lauren are tasked with making a cake on stage in just 45 minutes, which seems possible until Katherine forgets one key ingredient. 10 p.m., Food Network
Saturday (July 10)
Mexican Made Easy: "Cocktail Party." A cocktail-party menu, featuring spicy crab cakes topped with guacamole; goat-cheese tartlets; raspberry-chili chutney; and Mexican martinis with cucumbers. 9:30 a.m., Food Network
Paula's Best Dishes: "Bistro Brunch." A Paris-inspired brunch, featuring croque-madame casserole; French fries with mayonnaise dip; and chocolate crème brulée. 11:30 a.m., Food Network
5 Ingredient Fix: "Berry Happy." Cooking with berries: pork tenderloin in a blueberry rub; fennel, strawberry, and arugula salad; wild rice with cherries and pecans; and strawberry lemonade. 12:30 p.m., Food Network
Giada at Home: "Let Them Eat Cake." Prepared: grilled cheese with spinach and pancetta; fish sticks with marinara sauce; pound cake; and berry lemonade. 1 p.m., Food Network
Sunday (July 11)
Indian Food Made Easy: "Garden Party." A garden party gives Anjum a chance to test her novices' skills. 10 a.m., The Cooking Channel
Grill It! With Bobby Flay: "Salmon Anyone?" Cedar-plank-salmon tacos and sweet-and-spicy quesadillas are prepared by a viewer; Bobby Flay makes Asian-inspired grilled salmon in a hoison sauce and buckwheat-noodle salad. 10:30 a.m., Food Network
Guy's Big Bite: "Fieri's Fun Fair Food." Deep-fried pizza, corn dogs, and cotton-candy cocktails are made. 11 a.m., Food Network
Food Network Challenge: "Rock and Roll Hall of Fame." Various rock genres inspire four cake artists to create elaborate confections celebrating the 25th anniversary of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. 8 p.m., Food Network
Next Food Network Star: "Lunch Trucks with Paula." The eight remaining contestants create their own food products and present them in a live demo in front of hundreds of people. Then, Paula Deen tells them they'll be paired up in teams of two and will be operating their own lunch trucks at Venice Beach. 9 p.m., Food Network
(New Show!) Kid in a Candy Store: "Weird and Wacky." This series follow Adam Gertler as he checks out unique sweets across the country. In the premiere, he meets a baker who serves nachos with a sugary twist from her truck in New York City. He also visits an ice-cream shop in New Orleans that features some bizarre flavors, like beets and corn, and a taffy factory in Salt Lake City that makes taffy that's inspired by classic cocktails. 10:30 p.m., Food Network
