Chow Bella

Avocado Chantilly/Baby Food Nightmare, in "FoodLab 2010" (Part 5 of 7)

Molecular gastronomy (not the after-effect of eating too many black bean, spicy sausage and cheese nachos) is a scientific discipline that studies the physical and chemical processes that occur while cooking. Wonder what it tastes like? Find out in this seven-part series.

Blundering down the slippery slope of last week's dismal sparkling soft toffee, today's avocado chantilly (there's that word again) concoction seemed like yet another slap in the face courtesy of the French sadists at Cuisine Innovation.

Once again, in type-too-light-to-read-without-getting-a-headache printing, the recipe called for impossible-to-find grocery items and, this time, a gadget costing almost as much as the molecular gastronomy kit itself. Brilliant. Let's see what happens.

Recipe 4: Avocado Chantilly (ahem, whipped cream)

How does anti-oxidation work? According to the brochure from Cuisine Innovation, asorbic acid, more commonly known as vitamin C, is an antioxidant compound that prevents or stops oxidation.

Or, to fucking clue.

Tools and Ingredients:

Avocados, 200 ml. of banana juice (not available in stores, you have to make it or buy it as a blend with something else, like açaí berries), one packet of quality short breads (good cookies), and one siphon and charger of gas (priced at over $50 on Amazon - forget it).

The Process and Outcome:

Jacked. Seriously jacked. By using a banana and açaí berry blend instead of pure banana juice (again, can't buy it in stores) and mixing it with avocados -- in addition to not possessing an ounce of desire to buy a one-time product costing over 50 bucks -- the chantilly (or shit-tilly) looked and tasted like a baby food nightmare. And the cookies? Cuisine Innovation knows what they can do with their cookies. Pardon me, shortbreads.

FoodLab 2010 Report Card: Avocado Chantilly
Food Grade: D
Science Grade: F

Seriously, what's going on here? Aside from the metric system, this kit is an outrage to America. Chantilly? Get 27? Banana juice? Is this kit a serious bungle on the part of Cuisine Innovation or is France still pissed at the U.S. for laughing at them when they made Jerry Lewis part of their Legion of Honour?

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Laura Hahnefeld
Contact: Laura Hahnefeld