Is your hair/past full of secrets? Do you wish it/both were? Guess what, wannabe. Nobody cares.
What they do care about, however, is the ultra-fetch new Tumblr Mean Mad Men. It's that thing where the best quotes from Tina Fey's high school comedy Mean Girls are applied to images of AMC's Mad Men crew. The result? Total hilarity.
As if you needed another excuse to stop making out with that hot dog, crisp up some Toaster Strudel, and get amped for Mad Men's season six premiere on April 7, here are the five best plastics-approved mash-ups from MMM, you grotsky little byotch. (For funsies, we'll toss in five Mean Girls lines that are just begging for the Mad Men treatment.)
It's not his fault you're, like, in love with him or something.
She's a mouse. Duh?
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We heard he does car commercials -- in Japan.
SHE CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL. SHE'S ON AN ALL-CARB DIET.
One time, she punched me in the face. It was AWESOME.Five quotes we're dying to see on Mean Mad Men: 1. "You smell like a baby prostitute." 2. "If you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia . . . and die." 3. "So, you have your cousins, and then you have your first cousins, and then you have your second cousins." 4. "Irregardless, ex-boyfriends are just off limits to friends. I mean that's just like the rules of feminism." 5. "Oh, my God -- Danny DeVito! I love your work!"