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Top 5 Things to Do in Metro Phoenix This Weekend

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Kathy Griffin

Calm down, gurl. Yes, this year Kathy Griffin won a long-awaited Grammy for a comedy album, which has a title quite similar to the advice we've just given you. But that doesn't mean she's taking a load off with a box of wine. Although, we're sure her mom, lovable and notable box-wino/Kardashian expert Maggie, would approve of such low-jinks.

See also: Comedian Dave Coulier on the Best Advice Jay Leno Ever Gave Him

Instead, Griffin's on the road and hitting Arizona on her current tour. The pop culture obsessive's new material is sure to include gossip and gags related to topics such as reality television stars, hard-partying starlets, and her own celebrity encounters. See? No reason to get worked up.

On Friday, May 9, Griffin performs at Ovations Live at Wild Horse Pass, 5040 Wild Horse Pass Boulevard in Chandler. Tickets to the 8 p.m. set are $65 to $125. For more info on the 21-and-over event, visit www.wingilariver.com or call 1-800-946-4452. -- Becky Bartkowski

Julius Caesar

Presenting Shakespeare is always a tricky thing. Does the famous bard's centuries-old work get updated, or is a prim and proper approach best? In the case of Class 6 Theatre's vision, Shakespeare merely acts as guide and jumping off place. Believed to have been written in 1599, Julius Caesar gets a serious update for 2014. Togas are out, skinny jeans are in, and cell phone conversations are used for dialogue sharing. Of course, in Caesar's day, men dominated politics and society. Part of the fun here is the cross-gender, tables-turned direction the play follows as women become a major political force. Of course, it all ends the same -- with assassination and revolution -- but getting there is all the fun.

All hail Caesar at 7:30 p.m. Friday, May 9, and through Sunday, May 11, at Mesa Arts Center, One East Main Street. Tickets are $20, Military and Students $16. Visit www.mesaartscenter.com or call 480-644-6500. -- Glenn BurnSilver

Orange Theatre Spring Mixer

It's going to be big year for Big Brain Award winner Orange Theatre. The experimental performing troupe that won a Best Of Award for its 2013 production of Blood Wedding is taking on new multimedia projects in a new performance space. To kick things off it's throwing its Second Annual Spring Mixer. This community get-together warehouse-warming will offer live music from acts like North Brother Island, Bacchus & the Demonsluts, and Tom Bernard, digital art by Matthew Ragan, mixed beats by DJ Solchild, hand crafted cocktails from Titus Fauntleroy, and nosh from Valley restaurants.

Orange Theatre's Spring Mixer kicks off at 7:30 p.m. on Saturday, May 10, at its new location, 1711 West Culver Street, suite seven. There's a $15 suggested donation because, remember, this is technically a fundraiser. For details and to RSVP, check out Orange Theatre on Facebook or visit www.orangetheatre.org. -- Katie Johnson

Arizona Rollergirls Season Opener

If you can imagine a sport that combines the brutality of the NHL with the recklessness of NASCAR, only with more fisticuffs, more collisions, and a lot more mascara, you might be imagining the Arizona Rollergirls. Somehow these flat-track speed demons package all that brutish beauty into each of their highly entertaining yet family-friendly roller derby bouts while simultaneously giving them a Betty Page inspired makeover. With rosters rugged enough to startle even the most grizzled of gutter punks and alter-egos like Harm A. Knee and Heroin Monroe, it's hard to argue that the Rollergirls aren't keen on a certain aesthetic. But don't be fooled, these girls don't just look the part, they skate it, too.

The Arizona Rollergirls season four opening bout between Lolitas De Los Muertos and Ship Wreckers takes place on Saturday, May 10th at 6 pm at Mesa's Broadway Rec Center, 59 East Broadway Road. All ages welcome. $10 in advance, $13 at the door. Visit www.arizonarollergirls.com for details. -- Rob Kroehler

Dave Coulier

Dave Coulier might not be as handsome as Uncle Jesse (John Stamos) or as put together as Bob Saget's Danny Turner, but his portrayal of Uncle Joey on the 1990s sitcom Full House is not too far from his stand-up: family-friendly, goofy, and slightly all over the place.

The 55-year-old comedian continued to find success in the years following his primetime stint, bouncing from ABC to Nickelodeon to Vh1 hosting shows entitled World's Funniest Videos and America's Most Talented Kids. Expect an act featuring his popular vocal impressions and joke-riddled commentary on life. He'll be in the Valley for five shows over Mother's Day weekend -- and don't worry, it's clean enough to bring her without either of you blushing.

Laugh along at 7 p.m. Sunday, May 11, at the Tempe Improv, 930 East University Drive. Admission to the 21-and-over show is $20, and there's a two-drink minimum. Visit www.tempeimprov.com or call 480-921-9877. -- Janessa Hilliard

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