Wed 12/8 There comes a time in every rocker’s life when he grows weary of performing that signature hit, night after night. Even the metalheads of KISS are bound to stop wanting to rock ‘n’ roll all night (and party every day). Not Dick Dale. “The King of Surf Guitar,”…

12/3-12/5 Since ASU’s put the clamp-down on fraternity partying, Sun Devil brothers must find other outlets to express themselves. For example, the ninth annual Pharaoh Step Classic Stepshow, which takes place on Saturday, December 4, at the South Mountain High School Amphitheatre, 5401 South Seventh Street. Witness the Mu Eta…

Sat 12/4 Athletes of the Valley are probably used to navigating hazardous mountain terrain or dusty mountain trails, but could they manage climbing a 12-foot-high ramp covered with Crisco? Such obstacles await at the Phoenix Urban Adventure Race on Saturday, December 4, where — in addition to almost 25 miles…

Sat 12/4 When y’all are ready to wade through them thar beer cans and lawn appliances that ain’t worked fer years, park yer double-wide at the Pumphouse II, 4132 East McDowell, for the Miss Trailer 2005 Pageant and Trailer Trash Party on Saturday, December 4. They’ll have all the PBR…

Fri 11/26 Graduates of the “new school” of punk rock often have difficulty receiving validation from “old school” punks, the people who remember punk as the ultimate anti-commercial loogie hocked in the face of disco and self-indulgent ’70s guitar rock. Luckily, co-ed band Tsunami Bomb has received that validation, participating…

Thu 11/25 As the joke goes, they do celebrate Thanksgiving in Great Britain — only on September 6. Why? Because that’s when we Yankee blokes, back in 1620, fled jolly old England. (Ba-dum-cha!) But seriously, folks, desert-dwelling Britons (wanna-bes, that is) will celebrate T-Day with a party of their own…

Provided you somehow fight off a T-Day invasion by the extended family with the usual gourmet gorge-fest, relieving your ravenous relatives (not to mention snuffing out the usual psychodrama), you’ve still got yet another dilemma: They’re clamoring for some post-gluttony goings-on. Forestall a potential family feud with a good old-fashioned…

11/29-11/30 Marketing jingles, every sports franchise has got one. With the Suns, it’s “Working hard, playing harder.” Feh. The D-Backs? They dared ask “Is it a part of you?” Hardly. Arizona Gay Volleyball’s war cry? “Balls, Sand, and Sweat.” Now that’s a slogan. Not only is it laced with double…

Sat 11/20 If you Phantom fanatics out there can’t wait until Christmastime to hear music of the night, please refrain from firing up your BitTorrent clients to catch a sneak preview of Joel Schumacher’s adaptation of the world-renowned musical, that’s all we ask of you. You can wait a few…

As any economist worth his weight in T-bills will tell you, when entering into any risky venture, it’s best to do a cost-benefit analysis. Like if you’re some aspiring counterculturist, say, local rabble-rouser Phil Freedom, and you’re organizing a boffo benefit, it might behoove you to weigh your expenses and…

11/20-11/21 We’ve swallowed the notion that a swath of desert near Gold Canyon transforms into a Tudor-style village every spring for the past 16 years. So it’s no surprise the medieval merrymakers at the Devonshire Renaissance Faire have fooled us with their intricately crafted illusion that a 24-acre park in…

Sat 11/13 Looking back on the long and storied history of automobile culture, it’s safe to say no single decade mastered the art of the bold stroke more aptly than the 1950s. It was a time when real men were judged by the size of the flames on their side…

11/5-11/30 Skateboarding has always been an art form (after all, if your mom could pull off a 540 board varial or a 900-degree spin, then Tony Hawk would be just another SoCal skate rat with a mess of medical bills). Then there are actual artists, like Tucson’s Sam Esmoer, who’ve…

So, the first edition of your latest fanzine, Bad-Ass Things About Phoenix, has been put to bed, and you’ll be picking up all 300 freshly photocopied issues from Kinko’s in an hour or two. Now all you need to do is get your baby in front of some eyeballs, fast…

Tue 11/2 For politically active artists (redundant, we know), the presidential election is a bit like the Super Bowl, sans the beer commercials. Perfect time to gather like minds around the tube with some snacks, sodas and, in this case, a night full of satire. While election-watching parties on Tuesday,…

Go ask Alice: Chris Birkett is the closest thing to Jack Skellington the Valley will ever see. Don’t worry, the 29-year-old mobile DJ and wedding entertainer isn’t kidnapping Sandy Claws any time soon, but he is possessed by the same sort of macabre childlike madness for Halloween that the Pumpkin…

Ditch your donkey-show and dollar-a-day hooker dreams. Tijuana is a real town with more to love than its proximity. So says Culture Clash, a national Chicano-Latino performance troupe. Clash is breaking down cultural barriers and busting gringo balls with its original play Bordertown, the opening of the Actors Theatre’s 20th…

Ever since we were preteens, we’ve wanted to be James Bond and cruise the globe in search of SPECTRE and the honeys. We had every film memorized, right down to 007’s witty rejoinders as he dispatched whichever supervillain he was facing at a given moment (even if the double entendres…

Sat 10/16 Does Todd McFarlane ever sleep? In between overseeing day-to-day operations at three different companies, raising three kids, developing movie and television projects, and occasionally drawing pages for his signature title Spawn, the Valley resident and comic book mogul has been putting the finishing touches on McFarlane Toys Showroom…

When your name is Dr. Chud, which stands for “Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Drummer,” and your horror-punk-themed solo project is touring during the scariest time of the year, you’d expect a stage show filled with grisly gore, rotting corpses and ghastly deeds. So what does the good doctor mention first when…