Sex, lies and audiotape: This plumed penman reckons that could’ve been the subhead for Paul Rubin’s New Times cover story last week on Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s 2004 primary foe Dan Saban and Saban’s lawsuit seeking a million smackers over the smear tactics of Arpaio’s underlings, including Joe’s chief deputy David…
courtesy Sumita Tomerlin Foxy Lady: Sumita loungin’ it up… Wednesday is hard, and to get past it and closer to the weekend, we need help. That’s my thinking behind my new Wed. feature: Hump Day Honeys. Every Wednesday, I’ll feature some amazing babe from the Valley of the Sun along…
www.ktar.com Asswipe Gay-dork, after dark for a reason. Until last night, I was sure KTAR’s Bill O’Reilly-wannabe Darrell Ankarlo was the biggest butthole on the local airwaves. But then I heard Monday’s “Gaydos After Dark” program, which runs 9pm to Midnight weekdays, and I realized Ankarlo has a rival for…
Wikimedia Commons And the reorg at the Rep rolls on… Thie eve, I caught up with Arizona Republic publisher John Zidich (referred to by wags as Zee-Dick) via phone at his Scottsdale pad, and asked him about the reorganization of the Repugnant’s newsroom, which I blogged about on Wednesday. Zidich…
WikimediaCommons The crap you find online: A woodblock of some old Japanese biddy letting one fly. The first rule of fart club is: You don’t talk about fart club. The second rule of fart club is…Ok, you get the pic. Tyler Durden is a highly flatulent fellow who forms an…
See, chicks are hot even without their skin! So I got up really early this a.m. to hang out with a bunch of stiffs — specifically the mannequin-like corpses of Gunther von Hagens’ Body Worlds 3, on exhibit at the Arizona Science Center in Phoenix through May 28. By now,…
Oh, and after we’re finished, we’d like for you to reapply for your job. Stop the presses, while there are still presses to stop: The Arizona Republic’s currently undergoing a massive reorganization, which according to one source at the Gannett McPaper will result in the administrative shorthand, “Online first, paper…
Wikimedia Commons The Kingdom and the Power, as long as you’ve got crossword puzzles and Disney teenyboppper tripe. Five-plus years since the largest terrorist attack on American soil, and readers of The New York Times, still the nation’s most esteemed news source despite Jayson Blair’s monkeywrenching, are more interested in…
from Thenationmart.com Usually The Nation’s full of shit, but not with this cover. I’m not inclined to bitch about Duh!bya like the billion other whiney-ass libs on the Web. After all, I’m self-aware enough to know that what some blogger writes about the biggest American military mistake since Vietnam is…
from Ankarlo’s MySpace page Darrell dines out for a change… Listening to Ankar-low Brow this morning on KTAR 92.3 FM talking about how ‘rents shouldn’t spare the rod when it comes to their wayward youngins lest those youngins grow up to be assholes, I’m reminded of a little piece I…
Chuey’s greatest fantasy: To have knocked boots with Natalee Holloway before she croaked. This Friday’s wack-ass poll is dedicated to my personal hero Chuey the Rock ‘n’ Roll Midget, famous for hosting the Wed. night Wheel of Fear Factor at Giligin’s in Scottsdale. I profiled their Howard Stern-esque antics in…
This ornery oriole gags over the way most of the P-town press plays cocker spaniel to Sheriff Joe Arpaio. Take, for example, the myth that he’s the roughest, toughest lawman since Wyatt Earp, despite Arpaio’s dismal record handling the two main jobs of his office — process server and jailer…
http://www.ktar.com/ A face only Herman Munster’s wife Lily could love. Darrell Ankarlo’s KTAR 92.3 FM morning show is talk radio for people who think Dane Cook’s a friggin’ comic genius. His shtick is to appeal to the lowest common denominator while seeming reasonable and in possession of some profound mental…
courtesy M. Delgina Through a glass darkly: Michelle Delgina still wants to use the chick’s loo at Anderson’s… Michelle Delgina, one of the transgendered chicks-with-sticks who’s demanding to use the female facilities at Anderson’s Fifth Estate in Scottsdale, sent along pics of herself recently, and I thought I’d share. One…
www.southparkstudios.com Towlie wants to know what you like to do when you hitta da bong… It’s Friday, and that means it’s time for my first ever Friday Top Ten, in which I’ll poll the New Times staff on a subject, post that bitch, and ask you, the vast New Times…
Coming soon to a chick’s loo near you… As Ray Davies sang so long ago, “Girls will be boys and boys will be girls/ It’s a mixed up muddled up shook up world…” And indeed, some in the Valley’s pre-op community are determined to pee standing up at Anderson’s Fifth…
If Biltmore Fashion Park’s lookin’ paler than normal — whiter even than the line at a NASCAR concession stand — this bilious blackbird can tell ya why. Seems the swank, Vegasy restaurant-bar-nightclub io, which catered mostly to an upscale African-American crowd, has been kicked to the curb by AZ mall…
Is that Gary Busey in The Buddy Holly Story? Nah, it’s Ankarlo, happy as a pig in a turd pond after lickin’ Arpaio’s wingtips. So the Mormon-owned 92.3 FM KTAR didn’t waste much time showing the world what they’re all about with their new FM frequency by planting their premium…
More hot nurses that CNA copped from the U.K.’s Sun tabloid. Anyone doubting the Heart Attack Grill’s triumphant victory over the forces of political correctness as led by the speech police at the Maryland-based Center for Nursing Advocacy should check out the updates at HAG’s website. The page touts recent…
A common bedbug, Cimex lectularius, perhaps munchin’ out on Alison Trainer’s ass? When I first read this story online, I thought it said that Oprah got bedbugs from Paris Hilton. Then I stopped eating my toejam and reread it, “Opera singer sues Hilton claiming bedbugs attacked her.” Seems the opera…
http://www.danacarvey.net/ “Former President Gerald Ford was eaten by wolves. He was delicious.” I don’t think I’ve ever been so happy to see an ex-Prez get planted. Despite the nonstop eulogizing that has gone on for the last week, the ceaseless yapping about how Ford was a decent guy, and gosh-darnit,…
Yo, Lani, got a last-minute Xmas gift for ya… What pisses me off more than PHX light-rail construction, Mayor Phil “I’m a Pissant” Gordon, and the fact that most P-town restaurants close before 10pm? Answer: Tards who write me letters calling me a cross between Satan and Sasquatch, while using…
