Bars & Clubs

By the middle of the summer of 2012, we were choking on dust and dying of thirst. Suddenly, it occurred to us: If New Orleans can have the Hurricane, what's stopping Phoenix from creating her own cocktail homage to the haboob? And so we set forth on a bar-to-bar quest to find the bartender who could make our dream come true. It happened at Lon's, where Alexandria Bowler created a drink so unique — and so fitting — it deserves italics in its name. Bowler kindly provided us with her recipe for The Haboob. You're welcome.

The world of whiskey is wide. Nearly every country that produces grain also makes its own version of the dark liquor, and with thousands of different varieties, styles and brands available, it's easy to get lost in your travels. Old Town Whiskey's collection of bottles is no less daunting — the restaurant's library of more than 100 whiskey varieties is one of the most comprehensive in the state — but there's no better place to make your way through every single one. The décor evokes an upscale version of a Western saloon, where cowboys would kick back the firewater with ease, and with flights of one-ounce tasters available for a set price, soon you will be, too. That Iron Chef Jose Garces lends his own talents to the food menu — which includes duck fat fries, pickled seasonal vegetables, burgers, and steak — is just a perk.

Really, gin made tableside? Flaming shakers of Jameson? Can Richie Moe, Kris Korf, and crew get any more creative with their cocktails? Could anyone?! The Citizen Public House folks decided to make good use of an old VIP room by turning it into a speakeasy-style bar that serves cocktails you most definitely will not find anywhere else. If you're one of the lucky 30 to get in, you must try the Tableside G & T or the impressive Black Blazer, made with Jameson whiskey, black strap molasses rum, and maple syrup. The concoction is lit on fire and mixed until it reaches a beautifully sweet, boozy glaze that is poured over ice and topped with a float of fresh whipped cream and orange zest. It comes with a $17 price tag, but the show itself is worth the price, and the flavors are unforgettable.

Rumor has it there's a cool, skinny chola at the bar. No need to size her up or whistle too loud; this chick keeps it real and authentic without the unnecessary mixes and syrups. Yep, she's the skinny, fresh face of a kick-ass margarita with all the essential ingredients — Jose Cuervo Tradicional Blanco Silver Tequila, agave nectar, and lime juice — and without the diet-driven hype. True, her complex flavors make her a little hard to read. And if you ask for her to touch a blender, she might show you some serious chola attitude. But if you've had a rough day or are in the mood to celebrate, head over to Barrio Queen and find her. There's no better chola to have by your side.

WTF is a Pickle Back? That's probably what you're asking yourself right about now. We're about to tell you, but we need you to open your mind way up, so hear us out on this one. A Pickle Back isn't a shot of pickle juice mixed with something gross like tequila or ranch dressing, and it doesn't have any actual pickles in it whatsoever. It's more of a drink combo like a Lady Boy (gin and tonic, Bailey's, and a beer) or a bloody Mary with a sidecar (small beer). The Pickle Back is made up of three parts — one can of PBR, one shot of Jameson, and one shot of pickle juice — but you keep them all separate. Do not mix them together. Combining them into one drink may cause the world to explode (or leave a bad taste in your mouth). Once you have your three items in front of you, take the shot of Jameson, then chase it with the pickle juice (just do it; it's actually tasty and it takes away that pesky whiskey burn) and then sip on PBR. Try it, you might like it! Particularly at Kitchen 56, where they do it just right.

These days, bars tend to play it fast and loose with their martinis, slapping disparate fruits and herbs together with vodka and calling it good. MercBar is as guilty as anyone on this, though their mixtures — like the Espresso Martini made with Stoli Vanilla and Bailey's — are better-crafted than most. But to us, a true martini is made with lots of gin, a little vermouth, and olives, and it's with these simple things that Merc's bartenders shine. We've never had a better dirty martini than the one we sipped over a night spent people-watching at this dimly lit lounge.

Too much bacon? Pfft. Never. We still love bacon, and we'll savor it in any form — especially when it's in the form of vodka. This uptown bistro loads up their hangover helper with a mix of rich tomato juice, black pepper, spicy horseradish, and bacon vodka, then garnishes it with strips of smoky applewood bacon. The result is more of a meal than a beverage, but it will cure your Sunday-morning blues in no time.

The old saying goes — liquor before beer never fear; beer before liquor, never sicker. But what happens when you combine wine, whiskey, and other liquor together in one cocktail? We think it sounds like a hangover waiting to happen, but Carly's has managed to turn it into a sultry drink that we love sipping while enjoying one of their pressed sandwiches or a light hummus plate. The downtown Phoenix café combines whiskey with red wine, raspberry liquor, Orangina, and a splash of Sprite over ice in this non-traditional sangria. They even top it off with an adorable upside-down cherry. Cheers!

Head down the stairs at Sun Devil Liquors in Mesa and you'll be greeted by an unlikely sight, the Sun Devil Cellar and Pub. Navigate the bottles of aged wine and push past the plush curtains and you'll find a tiny nook of seclusion. Maybe a pianist tickles the black and white keys of a piano, or maybe there's just mellow sound drifting over the system, but either way, the quiet, dark basement feels wholly removed from the clinking bottles of microbrew upstairs. Order a glass of the Upper Cut '07 Cabernet Sauvignon and take a second to appreciate the fact that your phone's not getting any reception.

In 2010, Jim Lolli converted his two-year-old Buffalo Wings & Rings franchise into the Hungry Monk, where the ever-changing beer list boasts crafts from all over the country, as well as unique blends crafted by Monk staff and friends. Maybe it's the time he spent slinging wings, but Lolli has an eccentric approach to events that twists what beer can do and be. Think tapping a 10 percent ABV double IPA at 8 a.m. and pairing it with doughnuts is a good idea? Lolli did. How about a dinner of steak and pancakes served with stouts and beer-based syrups? Lolli's all about it. Tapping parties, beer festivals, and fundraising events are where the Monk shines, but you can get a deal every day of the week — the best day to visit is Wednesday, when craft pints are just $3.

Hop Knot beat out 80 other brews in the "American-style strong pale ale" category at the 2012 World Beer Cup, which makes sense — it beat out all comers to be named our Best Local Beer last year. Four Peaks' IPA blends four different hops added at different times in the brewing process, resulting in a piney, grassy symphony that fuses with sweet caramel malts in perfect harmony. Whether in keg or cask, bottle or can, the balance and drinkability this beer delivers every time we try it show why Hop Knot is — and remains — our favorite.

Over the past year, craft beer has exploded from a rising trend in hipster culture to a full-blown phenomenon. No longer will an "okay" beer selection with four handles and 10 bottles do. Nowadays, you'd better have at least 16 tap handles, and your bottle selection had better be epic. Thankfully, husband-and-wife duo Mat and Sharry Englehorn nailed the beer selection at their brand-new downtown Phoenix brew pub. After an entire year of renovations to Mat Englehorn's circa 1970s office building, the bar and restaurant, with its 31 rotating tap handles, opened its doors in August to the delight of the downtown craft beer drinking crews. Here you can find selections from your favorite locals, like Four Peaks and SanTan, and some of the best from national breweries such as Dog Fish Head, Odell, and Oskar Blues. Aside from the great beer selections, the pub also offers a menu of unique "upscale" bar food and a killer patio for hanging out with a nice pint on a cool Phoenix evening.

There are plenty of great reasons to visit Rúla Búla on a Wednesday night. The bar's cozy interior makes for a refreshing break from the Mill Avenue bustle and grind (the historic location, the Andre Building, certainly doesn't hurt), and the smooth-tasting pints of Guinness make the bar an Irish pub staple in the Valley. The bar's weekly pub quiz, hosted by Brainstormer Pub Quiz group, hosts bar tests and games all over the country. Teams square off against each other, answering questions about sports, pop culture, and history. Chances are the regulars are going to own the newbies, but remember: Pints of Guinness don't just make you strong, they sharpen cognitive skills, too. (We can't verify this claim, but it sounds good, right?)

Roastmaster supreme Jeffery Ross made fun of Arizona for four nights straight, which — admittedly — isn't too tough a task, given the backward-ass nature of our fair state. Meanwhile, Jackass star Steve-O is rumored to have stapled his scrotum to his leg during his visit, the motormouthed Pablo Francisco did shots with the audience and unleashed dozens of hilarious impressions, and infamous vulgarian Dave Attell spun disgustingly humorous yarns about his love of pornography. Yup, a multitude of memorable, mirthful, and madcap moments have taken place inside Stand Up Live since the snazzy-looking comedy club opened at CityScape in downtown Phoenix more than a year ago. A virtual "who's who" of comics has graced the stage at the upscale laugh den — which features such posh amenities as a copper fire pit and stone waterfall — including countless cutups who have appeared on Comedy Central programming or worked the late-night chat circuit. Besides appearances by homegrown yukster David Spade, Stand Up Live has been visited by former Saturday Night Live cast members Jay Mohr and Jim Breuer, as well as Drew Carey, 30 Rock star Tracy Morgan, and Brian Posehn of Mr. Show fame. A variety of up-and-coming local comedians are also showcased throughout the month, and thanks to the club's high-tech sound system, you can practically hear the flop sweat dripping off their brows after a bad joke bombs.

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The history of American music is littered with legends about "pickup bands," units of players so adept and quick on their feet that touring songwriters needed only to show up in town and contact the band to back them at a bar or club gig. The members of the karaoke band at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar and Grill in Mesa are kind of like those legendary sidemen, only they back up a different kind of performer: the warbling drunkard stumbling on stage to belt out a rendition of "Neon Moon." That these guys are pro enough to make even the worst singer sound passable isn't just a skill. It's what makes this East Valley haunt so popular with townies and regulars.

Ask any self-respecting hipster what Phoenix bar has the best jukebox in town and you're asking for an argument. Though we're certainly not immune to the charms of other establishments, it's hard to deny the nearly universal appeal of the Shady's box. Featuring soul, vintage alternative, punk, mod, Brit pop, and local gems from Phoenix's past, the Shady's juke not only features a little of everything, but the selections representing each genre are top-notch. So let the argument rage on — as long as there are the kind of rocksteady sounds found on the Shady's jukebox to shout over.

In local director Travis Mills' The Big Something, a slacker noir set in the Valley, pool hall Q& Brew plays a pivotal role. It makes sense. Nestled away in the same strip mall that houses the Yucca Tap Room and Sky High Smoke shop, the Brew has got a lo-fi kind of charm. It's resolutely hipster-proof, the kind of place you go for a real game of pool (a couple of local leagues meet there), not some sort of ironic Portlandia skit. Which isn't to say that the place is shady. The staff keeps things exactly as they should be, and the plush tucked leather bar is one of the smoothest and coolest in town.

In Scottsdale, theme bars are king. The city's nightlife landscape overflows with rustic cowboy saloons, greasy rock joints, kitschy island bars, and even an effin' dance club inspired by a bank. So it's not surprising in the least that Spanish Fly, a Mexican beach bar with a pool on the premises, would be a hit. The concept proved so successful that its proprietors (who also own such theme eateries as Geisha A Go Go and Stingray Sushi) opened a similar swimming spot called El Santo in North Scottsdale. And it's just as groovy as its sister establishment, if not more so. Boasting a much larger and swankier spread than Spanish Fly, El Santo features a 2,800-square-foot pool, twice as many chic VIP cabanas, a bigger waterfall, two separate bars (including one resembling a gigantic grass hut), and waitresses sporting teeny-tiny bikinis. The kitchen serves delicious street-style tacos and other Baja cuisine offerings, but be sure to use a napkin when noshing, lest you stain your designer swimsuit with chipotle sauce.

A good jukebox is key to a good time — even if you're watching the game. Hey, we're all about multi-tasking these days, even when we're out on the town. And the jukebox at Time Out Lounge typically pumps out good jams from the likes of Elvis Costello, The Buzzcocks, and The Stooges. It's usually pretty mellow in the Time Out, as the name suggests, but that's one of its main charms. Behind its wood-paneled walls (blocking the windows, natch), punks and scenesters shoot pool, drink cold beers, and, yes, watch football (or the game du jour). The Time Out is a no B.S. kind of place, and while you can find trendier and hipper bars around town, why would you want to?

Neighborhood sports bars don't get much more authentic than Arcadia Tavern, the kind of place where cheering on your team during the big game is just as enjoyable as hanging out during halftime. Plenty of plasma TVs in the bar, on the patio, and just about everywhere else you look guarantee there's not a bad seat in the house. And their 18-ounce draft beers, served in weighty glass goblets, make sure you'll get an arm workout while you watch. The food satisfies and the friendly staff will ensure you know about the ever-important game-day specials.

Not being able go to the game doesn't burn nearly as bad when you can watch it from Coach & Willie's. Since 2000, this downtown establishment has been winning customers over with its killer patio and stiff drinks. Located close enough to Chase Field that you can still hear the crack of the bats, Coach & Willie's makes it almost too easy to stumble in after a few too many brews at the game — at least they've got plenty of above-par bar food to soak up the extra beer. Win or lose, you usually can count on some post-game action at this local watering hole.

We've all had it happen before. Just enough time on the clock for one last drive — and your team needs seven to clutch the win. The best way to release all that nervous tension? Smashing peanuts and throwing the waste all over the floor. Hungry or not, we always manage to make a serious dent in the bucket of peanuts found on every table at Teakwoods — and the food you actually pay for isn't bad, either. Mostly, we show up for the 360-degree views of flatscreen TVs and the affordable pitchers of beer. The mixture of lowbrow peanut-tossing and casual neighborhood hangout vibe makes Teakwoods a great place to drink away the blues we're bound to get for being Cardinals fans.

The newest Zipps location keeps all the best parts of this Valley favorite sports bar chain. Exposed brick and too many TVs to count carry on a classic Zipps tradition, but the young feel of the surrounding neighborhood keeps things fun. We've been known to indulge in drunken shuffleboard, and the Golden Tee machine — a staple in any top-tier sports bar — constantly calls to us from across the room. A trip to Zipps wouldn't be complete without a basket of their "golden" wings, but by far our favorite part about this place has to be their Zipparita. One too many, and we're ordering a round for the whole place.

There are more than enough sports bars in Stinger's neighborhood, and they all seem to embrace their rough-around-the-edges appearance. But no one likes to walk into a bar full of regulars and feel the burning stare of patrons and employees demanding, "Why are you here?" Though Stinger's is sure to be full of regulars on any given night, we like its sociable attitude and the bartenders' welcoming service. Whether you're in to watch the game or just grab a drink, there's going to be plenty to watch at this true sports bar. Considering the in-house pool league, off-track betting, dartboards and other games, Stinger's offers quite a showing — besides the action on the numerous TVs, of course.

There's no shortage of places to catch a game in the East Valley, but forget about finding a seat if you don't stake out a spot well before kickoff. That's when we head to Cactus Moon. Because whether we show up in the first half or the bottom of the ninth, there's always room for us and our beer. We'll admit we were skeptical of a sports bar in the Mesa Riverview shopping complex, but there's nothing corporate about this family-run operation. Even after the final whistle blows, we stick around for when they clear the floor for late-night fun. Our favorite is Thursday's country-Western theme.

Okay, so it's a chain. But being located within spitting distance of a college campus means this sports bar — excuse us, "sports-themed family restaurant" — gets real rowdy on game day. Our favorite nights of the week are easily Tuesday and Thursdays, when we can order a plateful of wings for just 45 cents apiece. This place bleeds college-casual atmosphere, and with its recent renovations, we're happy to stay for this game and the next. Bar food is bar food, but Native New Yorker's unique wing flavors such as Honey Hot, Parmesan Dusted, Strawberry Hot, and Spicy Honey Mustard mean your taste buds don't have to get bored or burned.

There are quite a few reasons we love coming to Duke's, not the least of which is owner Al McMarthy, a man who's not afraid to hop on the mic and make the whole place cheer for a table of champion beer league softball players. We also love Duke's because it has enough TVs to satiate our totally neurotic need to view every sporting event at once. And because the place respects our waistlines. While we're sure to guzzle well over our daily allowance of calories in beer, we can reconcile our conscience with Duke's extensive salad menu. We appreciate a sports bar where greens aren't a just a second thought or a sad excuse of a side dish. Most importantly, with three rooms and large patio spaces, you don't have to sit anywhere near the enemy fan camp.

They don't call it the "Dirty Verde" for nothing. The Palo Verde Lounge in Tempe has earned its reputation as a thoroughly rock 'n' roll watering hole the old-fashioned way: serving up cold domestic beers, not spending too much time mopping the floors, and never catering to the snooty hipster set. The kind of bands that take stage (the floor space directly in front of the arcade machines) are hip, but the kind of hip that understands that the coolest thing anyone or anything can do is not waste valuable drinking and rocking time worrying about what's cool and what isn't. The jukebox is stocked with the same kind of "take no guff" classics — so don't visit expecting some cheap chic façade. The P.V. is the real deal, and thank the rock 'n' roll gods for it.

If the black walls of the Blooze Bar could talk, they'd probably sing some rollicking yarn in 4/4 time about all the evils that both women and the bottle hath wrought. After all, they are the sort of ditties that are dispensed in this North Phoenix venue during its long-running rockabilly night every Thursday. A big portion of Valley rockabilly history has unfolded on its stage each week for more than five years, as a nonstop parade of local hepcat bands have primped their pompadours and plucked their standup basses here. Any local rockabilly or psychobilly act worth mentioning has pulled a gig at the Blooze, whether it's veteran favorites (like The Rhythm Dragons or Pat Roberts and the Heymakers) or scene newbies like Trailer Queen. Meanwhile, flocks of femme fatales sporting Bettie Page 'dos and countless tattoos break plenty of hearts of would-be suitors in the audience, and local custom-car clubs are known to show off their supercharged vintage hot rods in the parking lot.

The drink pixies behind the granite-topped bar at this upscale gay-oriented drinkery in the heart of Park Central Mall aren't stingy with either their smiles or their pours. Kobalt's cocktails are ridiculously potent, which may explain why the place always buzzes with laughter, vivacious conversation, and enlivened antics. It's also one of the reasons why Kobalt draws a diverse clientele from across the LGBTQ spectrum into its mellow and immaculately decorated milieu, where anything goes and everyone's welcome, even if they happen to be straight. No one bats an eye when a 6-foot-2 drag queen teeters into the place on stiletto heels for Taylor Made's illusionist extravaganzas on the first Saturday of the month, nor do they care when singers vocalize at the twice-weekly karaoke sessions on Sundays and Tuesdays. Ditto for whenever club kids tromp around during the high-energy dance night on Fridays and Saturdays or when well-groomed types stop by for massages and martinis on Wednesday. Kobalt's bartenders simply give a knowing wink and fill the glass with something strong.

Spend a Friday or Saturday night at the Cash, as some regulars refer to it, and you're likely to witness a real life episode of The L Word, writ large. Crammed to the rafters every weekend with members of the Sappho set, this CenPho saloon is one of the most enduring lesbian bars in the Valley, kicking around the scene for nearly two decades. Catering to a colorful cross-section of unforgettable patrons — ranging from jockish-looking ladies in shorts and T-shirts to femme fatales in revealing outfits and tattooed punk princesses sporting belt buckles that state "It ain't gonna lick itself" — Cash Inn features poker on Sundays and Wednesdays, free darts and $2.50 domestics and well cocktails on Tuesdays, and sassy bartenders who call you "honey" seven nights a week. Hit the place during line-dancing night on Thursdays and you'll see nothing but cowgirls learning how to two-step. Meanwhile, weekends have a more diverse musical menu of rock and hip-hop from DJ Steele.

No, your eyes aren't playing tricks on you. The manager did, in fact, stick a small bowl hewn from an apple and packed with shisha atop your water pipe. Or maybe it was made from watermelon or a pear. Regardless, adding the fresh-cut produce helps accentuate any of Hookah Mania's 40 flavored tobaccos with a fruity zest. It's one of the many amenities that the staff at this Tempe hookah lounge adjacent to Lebanese restaurant Mijana provides to its patrons. Attentive service is another, as they'll eagerly whisk out aromatic pots of potent Turkish coffee, dishes laden with Middle Eastern cuisine, or a few extra coals for your nargile. The atmosphere is both communal and chill as couples, families, and college kids gather in cozy seating areas filled with vintage and velvety furniture and decorated with warm colors, exotic-looking artwork, and glowing candles. A mellow buzz of conversation fills the air along with wafts of Arabic pop music, the chatter of friends playing card games, and the ever-present bubbling of sweet-smelling smoke being huffed.

Long ago and far away, lighting up a cigarette used to signify style, sophistication, and class. (Try picturing the iconic Humphrey Bogart prowling around Rick's Café Américain in Casablanca without a Camel clutched in hand). That era, however, is long since past. These days, smokers have been relegated to pariah status and exiled to butt-strewn smoking areas outside local bars or banished to the parking lot to take a puff. Well, unless they happen to be hanging out at Zoan, that is. This CenPho establishment offers nicotine fiends a tony-looking parlor adjacent to the main bar in which to smoke away until their lungs cry uncle while still being able to enjoy their drinks. Earlier this year, owner Rhonda Walden had one wall of Zoan's posh lounge replaced with a latticework of metal bars and screens, transforming it into an open-air smoking patio. It's 100 percent legal in the eyes of the law, not to mention being easy on the eyes. Abstract art lines the walls, while ornate furnishings and warm light decorates the room. A flatscreen TV broadcasts high-energy dance music videos and the both a pool table and dart machine are available for play. Best of all, the room is so well ventilated that it doesn't reek of tobacco, unlike many of its patrons after they get done sucking on a few Marlboros.

Hands down one of the coolest tiny bars in Phoenix, The Little Woody has stolen our boozy hearts. Part of The Vig's growing family of bars, TLW embodies everything that we want in a neighborhood watering hole. The wood-planked walls and dim lighting create a perfect escape from the harsh afternoon sun in the summer and a cozy hideaway during the cooler months. The friendly staff shakes up a mean cocktail, and they have a killer selection of draft beer. For those of you who want to slum it, order The Codger. It's a shot of Old Granddad whiskey and a can of Old Style for just $5. If you have too many (on a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday and live within two miles), The Vig Rig will drive you home.

It would be enough for FilmBar to provide downtown Phoenix patrons with the kind of art-house fare you don't get at mall cinemas, but FilmBar doesn't stop there. The "bar" in FilmBar is just as impressive, offering not only a chill place to hang out and a nice selection of craft beers, but music unlike any other club in town (courtesy of selectors like Djentrification, whose Saturday night Palace World Music party is the most unique sound going). The seating is communal, low, and plush, and the vibe on a Saturday night is energetic but friendly, mellow, and, like the neighborhood that houses it, funky enough to freak out uptight squares.

It's a good thing that the proprietors of this North Valley gin joint have a couple of large clocks hanging near the bar to remind patrons of the passage of time. Otherwise, it's likely that they might waste away the entire day huddled away inside The Loft Again. (As a matter of fact, it seems a few of the regulars wind up doing so anyway.) It's hard to pry yourself away from any of the comfy barstools and head home when this darkened drinking den offers so much: They keep the AC blasting and the lights dimmed inside, allowing you the chance to drink in both comfort and seclusion. A daily happy hour showcases $2.50 well cocktails and $2.25 domestic longnecks, the bartending staff has a tendency toward heavy pours, and salty snacks like popcorn and potato chips are readily available. If your stomach's rumbling for something other than bar snacks, the staff occasionally brings in home-cooked dishes like chili or sloppy joes. If you get bored, there's music trivia bingo on Tuesdays, open mic on Wednesdays, and live rock bands on the weekend. Hang out here long enough and your mug might be pasted onto the ongoing photo collage of regulars along one wall, or maybe on a "missing" poster that your family will end up circulating.

Cozy neighborhood bars are hard to come by in the corporate strip-mall haven of Ahwatukee, but there is at least one place you can go where everybody knows your name. Brad's Place is a little bit dive bar, a little bit sports bar, and a whole lot of neighborhood friendliness. The beers are always cold, the burgers are big, and if there's a Vikings game on, you'd better be rooting for the Vikes.

So you say like to sing, huh? This colorful West Valley watering hole, tucked away in the corner of a Peoria strip mall behind a McDonald's, offers some extremely lively karaoke nights four nights a week from Thursday until Sunday. It's just one of the many draws of Enoch's, which also offers a daily happy hour commencing at 6 a.m. each day and a menu filled with tasty bar grub. People-watching also is a favorite pastime, as patrons run the gamut, from the blue-collar crowd and neighborhood regulars who stop by after the workday is done to the beautiful babes who pack the place on nights and weekends. Still bored? Try your hand at billiards, darts, or perhaps some arcade games, or maybe just listen to the informative-yet-inane pontifications of some barstool philosopher perched next to you.

As the cocktail-swilling frog depicted on the vintage neon-filled sign portends, Groggy's is a neighborhood bar of the dive variety. As such, this Mesa drinking destination possesses just the right mix of laid-back charm and slummy thrills, not to mention all the appropriate hole-in-the-wall trappings: a claw game stocked with adult novelties, hipster college kids from nearby schools, a menu of cheap and greasy snacks, and chairs with a little bit of wobble to 'em. Thankfully for pool sharks, the joint's billiards equipment is kept in pristine condition — that is, all the cues are straight and the felt on each of the half-dozen tables doesn't boast any stains or rips. Games are always 50 cents, daily food specials are available, and the weekday happy hour offers $2.50 well drinks and $2 domestic pints. While one can drink and dine on the cheap, try not to overindulge unless you wanna resemble the inebriated amphibian outside.

Baer's Den used to be one of those blink-and-you'll-miss-it kind of bars, as its teeny-tiny former location tucked alongside a motel was literally about the size of a one-car garage. After moving about 200 feet down Apache Boulevard earlier this year, however, this sports and spirits paradise is now housed in bigger and much more prominent digs. Thankfully, owner Scott Baer kept the bar's wood-paneled walls, as well as the cozy aura and amiable atmosphere that's not unlike the convivial dives that the East Coast native used to frequent before moving out west more than two decades ago. Since there are more HDTVs around the place and the bar and patio are both larger, there's less jockeying for elbow room amongst the ASU coeds who frequent Baer's for a drink or a glimpse at the game. Sun Devils looking for an after-class adult beverage or residents from the surrounding neighborhood enjoying any of the 10 beers on tap or $2 tequila shots on Tuesdays aren't the only ones who cruise into Baer's Den, as it's a major haven for Red Sox fans and other devotees of Boston's fabled sports franchises. So it might behoove you to never besmirch Tom Brady or utter the names Bucky Dent and Bill Buckner when stopping by for a cocktail.

For some barflies and day drinkers, neighborhood watering holes practically serve as virtual homes away from home. This seems particularly true at this homey Scottsdale dive, which boasts den-like décor and has the well-worn comfy feel of a personal bar set up in someone's basement, right down to the pressboard walls and cheesy billiards-themed fabric lining the barstools. Heck, even the smoking patio could double as a laundry room, as patrons sit at a makeshift table made from an old washtub sink or set their drinks on a percolating water heater. As such, stepping into the Roadrunner on any given night is like stopping by a neighbor's house to down some cheap beer (cans of Milwaukee's Best and Pabst Blue Ribbon are always $1.50) or a strong cocktail, check out the game, or possibly engage in a friendly game of pool. The place always seems packed with a colorful mix of people who sometimes engage in the sort of weirdly inspired conversations you'd hear only at a backyard barbecue or house party.

A food lover's dream is being able to afford just one six-course tasting from top Arizona restaurant Binkley's. At $96 per person, it probably won't happen for us anytime soon, but now that Binkley's sister restaurant, Café Bink, has a happy hour, we can try a little bit of Bink for just a little bit of cash. From 3 to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday, you can experience creative tastes from James Beard Award finalist Kevin Binkley without a Binkley price tag. Roast beef sliders ($2.50), wagyu beef burgers ($7), award-winning fries ($5), and crisp green salads ($4) all are on the dirt-cheap menu. Pair your gourmet eats with half-price glasses of wine, draft and bottled beers, and well drinks for the best happy hour deal in town. You may have to ditch work to drive to Carefree (which isn't technically in Phoenix, but it is north), but sometimes you have to sacrifice a silly report to please your taste buds.

When we need more than just a cheap plate of nachos and a room-temperature Coors Light, we call up our favorite happy hour buddies and head over to James Beard Award-winning chef Christopher Gross' restaurant at the Biltmore. From 3 to 6 p.m. every single day of the week, you can score gourmet burgers, truffled frites, wood-fired pizzas with exotic toppings, and cheese plates — all of which are half-price at Christopher's Kitchen Bar or at Crush Lounge. If you're thirsty, all well cocktails, wine, and beers also are half-price.

After a long day at our 9 to 5, there is nothing we want more than to be drinking a pint of cold craft beer and listening to our favorite old-school jams on the patio of The Main Ingredient. The renovated 1920s Coronado neighborhood bungalow turned restaurant always has an enticing selection of local and craft beers on tap and a glass of wine for as little as $4, as well as cocktail specials. Main Ingredient doesn't feature specials on food, but with its drink prices so cheap, we're willing to shell out $4 for a bowl of housemade salsa and our favorite chips, made at La Tolteca.

As far as we're concerned, the only spot to go for happy hour in Ahwatukee is chef Doug Robson's Hillside Spot for a bowl of crispy chips served with his nearly famous extra-hot red sauce for just $1. There's other stuff on the menu, like the absolutely horrible-for-you-but-tastes-so-good fried cheese crisp and an open-face grilled cheese sandwich — but the real draw is that hot sauce. Local brews from Oak Creek Brewing and Four Peaks are just $3, or you can knock $3 off specially selected wines by the glass. Happy hour runs from 4 to 6 p.m. Monday through Thursday. We highly recommend the patio, but sitting at the bar watching the kitchen do its thing is fun, too.

Robbie Fox's little brother Johnny is just as much as a happy hour troublemaker as his older Tempe sib. Half off the entire menu from 3 to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday means $3 Jameson shots, $6 shots of Macallan 15-year, and $7 bowls of lamb stew. The public house is full of old-school Irish character and gets packed during happy hour and on weekend nights. But for $3 shots of Jameson, we're willing to brave the crowd. Bottoms up!

The baby of the Boston Street block of eating and drinking hot spots, Vintage 95 gets our business when we want to relax with a couple of friends. The dimly lit wine bar reminds us of wintertime, with its plush leather couches and crackling fireplace — a welcome escape from the searing sun during the summer months. During the "Official Hours of Happiness" — that is, 4 to 6 p.m. daily and all day Wednesdays — you can score cocktails, bottle and draft beer, and wine by the glass or bottle for a discounted price, or you can go the smart route and take Vintage 95 up on this offer: Buy a bottle of wine and receive a free bruschetta board. For about $35, enjoy a whole bottle of a nice red with your choice of four different bruschettas topped with fab ingredients such as mascarpone, dates and pistachios, fig chutney, or housemade mozzarella.

Tacos, tacos, and more tacos — that's what's on the menu at this popular Tempe hangout. Snag a seat on the restaurant/tequila bar's wrap-around patio for prime people-watching and killer margaritas. From 4 to 6:30 p.m., the appropriately named "Halfy Hour" offers everything on the beer and tequila menus for half price, as well as house margaritas, well drinks, and a decent-size selection of food. Skip the fish tacos and go straight for the pibil pork variety — and don't forget the chips and salsa.

If you look up the word "swanky" in a dictionary (a big book of word definitions), there is a good chance that a picture of Mabel's on Main's sleek and inviting interior will be front and center. The lounge pays homage to its classic gentlemen's club roots with heavy chandeliers, leather wingback chairs, wood-paneled walls, and roomy booths. From 5 to 9 p.m. Sunday through Thursday, the lounge offers its whole menu at half-price. That means everything, including tangy mac and cheese for $4, a gourmet grilled cheese with prosciutto for $5, and any of its signature cocktails. And don't be scared of the happy hour clientele. The atmosphere is a bit more chill than the posh late-night scene.

If you've ever been to a weeknight show at the Yucca, you've no doubt seen Venus Salin behind the bar. Slaving away, pouring PBRs and craft beers, she serves not only as bartender but also as the front-of-house manager, turning off the jukebox when bands are ready to play and dispensing drink tokens to musicians who doubtless are scheming for free beer. It's a hard job, no doubt, but you wouldn't know it watching Venus, whose smooth moves and effortless smile make it seem as if she's been doing it forever — though her youthful looks certainly don't betray that she has.

Punk rock is a cyclical beast. It tends to blow up big once every decade, only to slink back into the shadows and reinvent itself before emerging once again. The same could be said for the Valley's punk scene, which has endured its fair shares of ebb and flow over the past 30-odd years as bands break up and bars close, only to be replaced by fresh faces or different venues. To wit: While punkers suffered through the loss of such landmark bars as Jugheads or Rogue West in recent years, they've recently embraced the Eastside Tap as a frequent destination. Probably because it has the hallmarks of a great punk spot: a divey feel, PBR and Hamm's on tap or in cans, and a diverse jukebox loaded up with everything from psychobilly to ska. More important, owner Johnny Tabeek has started bringing in local bands that rock a rebellious vibe, whether it's the three-chord vulgarity of Dirty Hairy and Gunrunners, the rockabilly strains of 13 to the Gallows, or the outlaw alt-country of Adam Lee Cogswell. Fittingly, the joint is just down the street from the old Jugheads, which means punks will be in familiar territory when visiting the Eastside Tap.

At Meat Market Garment Factory, it's business up front, party in the back. We're not suggesting that Ben Funke or Cory Martinez, the fashionable young couple who run this small DIY venue, proudly sport Kentucky Waterfalls. We simply are describing how things are set up here. The anterior portion of this under-the-radar space, located in a Tempe office park, is devoted to storing stock for their Mill Avenue clothing shop Meat Market Vintage, while the rear is where underground punk, hardcore, and indie rock shows are staged. Despite being in the same ilk as other lo-fi industrial storage venues like the dank (and now-shuttered) Yellow Canary Dancehall, MMGF has some charm and actual décor to it, including retro-style salon hairdryers serving as seating and a variety of quirky-looking sweaters and shirts hanging from the ceiling rafters. And then there's the old neon signage from defunct punker haven Eastside Records, which Funke (a longtime member of the local music scene) somehow got his hands on and placed along one wall. It adds an extra bit of punk legitimacy to the proceedings.

Mesa bar Hollywood Alley is a longstanding fixture in the Phoenix scene, known as a home to hip-hop, punk, garage, and, notably, metal. In recent years, a specific brand of powerful and crushing Phoenix metal has found a home at the venue, with bands like Daughters of Fission, TwinGiant, Enirva, and Hogjaw lugging heavy amps into the bar to blast the down-tuned stuff. It's not bonehead metal, the scene that gathers at the Alley — it's something else, something knottier and more complicated, but not lost up its own rear end or lacking soul. The Alley's been around forever, and if it's home to this kind of stuff, we hope it never goes away.

You can't ask for much more. On a cool evening (Saturday, January 21, to be exact) Wilco performed at beautiful Gammage Auditorium. Designed by Frank Lloyd Wright, the pink wedding cake of a structure is, arguably, not the best when it comes to acoustics. Didn't matter this night. Carefully blending disparate elements of country rock, experimental German art music, driving pop, and blue-eyed soul, songwriter Jeff Tweedy and his band had the sold-out audience swooning. The stage was gorgeous, bathed in blue light with orange accents on hanging papier-mâché cut-outs. The set was perfect, featuring crowd favorites like "Hotel Arizona" and the ecsatic "Impossible Germany." It's one of those shows you lie and say you were at even if you weren't. In a word, legendary.

It almost feels like cheating: Joel Marquard's spectacular Through and Through Gospel review performance on Saturday, July 14, was a local music triumph, uniting members of some of the Valley's best bands — Gospel Claws, What Laura Says, Where Dead Voices Gather, Ladylike, Yellow Minute, and more — for an eight-song set that felt almost as much like church (in a good way) as it did a club show. Not to mention that most of the aforementioned bands played beforehand, making the show feel almost like a festival, a sort of precursor to Crescent's Dias de la Crescent two-day event in the fall. Marquard's makeshift gospel hymns were given a powerful lift by the all-star Phoenix cast, and the whole thing was made even more special by its exclusivity: Marquard doesn't plan on trying to re-create it. And how could he?

The idea of a band doing a 50-song set is enough to make even the most ardent concert-goer a little nervous. Fifty songs? Can any band maintain the level of energy and spirit to make that work? Factor in the band members' median age, 70, and those doubts are even more compounded. But despite all the unlikelihoods, The Beach Boys' 50th Anniversary concert at Grand Canyon University Arena wasn't just passable. It was tremendous. With all surviving original members, Brian Wilson, Al Jardine, Mike Love, and David Marks, the boys nailed every song they took on — even the dreaded and rightfully reviled "Kokomo." The show was a rare thing in the world of anniversary and nostalgia cash grabs: a bona fide retrospective look at one of the pop music's greatest bands, a powerful stroll through their catalog, and, above all, a tremendously enjoyable show.

We're generally the kind of people who like to see more intimate shows, but you know, you can't see Bob Dylan at the Yucca, can you? (Come to think of it, that would be pretty awesome.) Luckily, the unique layout of Comerica Theatre makes big shows feel, well, a little less "arena-ish." Hosting a wide range of acts, from comedian Louis C.K. to classic rockers Guns N' Roses to Alice Cooper's annual Christmas Pudding soiree, Comerica's comfortable auditorium features nothing but good seats and is refreshingly air-conditioned. We'll take club shows any day of the week, but if we're sitting down, we want to do it here.

Few venues can boast as impressive a second act as The Nile Theater, in downtown Mesa. Since reopening under the direction of Mantooth Group in 2010, the venue has spearheaded a kind of downtown revival, hosting punk and hardcore in the sweaty and utterly rock 'n' roll basement (re-dubbed The Underground as opposed to just "the Nile Basement") and singer/songwriter/indie fare in the neighboring (and couch-equipped) Lo-Fi Coffee. Punk and hardcore legends — like The Bouncing Souls and Alkaline Trio — take the stage, and the folks at Mantooth are never shy about fostering a DIY sense of community, tapping the best of the all-ages rock scene to open up for venerated lifers and play the annual Within These Walls festival. Downtown Mesa still has a way to go, but with the likes of the Nile Theater leading the way, it's easy to see things heading where they ought.

The Rogue Bar plays host to plenty of good touring acts (remember when controversial black metal band Liturgy brought its hipster sound to the Valley?), but the venue truly shines when it comes to locals. The venue's residency program, which gives a weekly platform for buzzing locals like Snake! Snake! Snakes! to experiment, curate lineups of their favorite bands, and try new material, has inspired similar shows at Crescent Ballroom and Long Wong's in Tempe. Owner Emmanuel Tripodis is a vocal booster of locals like Yus and rap-rock dynamos Wolphpac, and the excellent sound system at the venue and his tireless support of local music (he was early to champion local-friendly radio station KWSS) keep the Scottsdale bar a destination for fans. What's more, this year saw the return of dance parties at Rogue curated by William "Fucking" Reed, and the new night, "Rebel Yell," instantly reminded locals of the legendary "Shake" night at Rogue.

Charlie Levy apparently is a very patient man. After his famed Tempe music venue Nita's Hideaway closed in 2002, the local concert promoter waited almost a decade to open another place of his own. He was biding his time until a spot that was just the right size and in a perfect location became available. And when that day finally dawned last summer, he pounced, starting the process that brought the Crescent Ballroom to downtown Phoenix. Making up for lost time, Levy snatched up the location of flash-in-the-pan R&B joint Bentley's Nightclub and began a whirlwind three-month renovation of the building, a former auto garage constructed in 1917. Outside, unsightly stucco was removed to expose the original red brick underneath, while the inside was transformed into a concert hall with a swanky bar and lounge in the front. The Crescent made its debut last October, and it's been unlike any other music venue in the Valley. Patrons and musicians have raved about its choice acoustics and crystal-clear sound system, as well as such nifty amenities as the bleacher-like stadium seating in the rear of the house allowing the more diminutive fans a primo view of the stage. And they wouldn't want to miss a minute of any show, considering the level of talent that's performed here. A "who's who" of indie tastemakers, folk troubadours, and art rock icons have passed through the place, including names like Iron & Wine, Phantogram, Santigold, and St. Vincent, just to name a few. As a result of all of these factors, the Crescent has become a much-beloved concert palace and increased Levy's legend tenfold. Guess that patience paid off, right?

When nightlife impresarios Edson Madrigal, Pete Salaz, and Sean Badger dubbed their newest endeavor the regal-sounding Monarch Theatre, it wasn't a self-aggrandizing gesture. Truth be told, the trio pretty much reigns supreme over the downtown Phoenix club world. They already own Bar Smith, arguably the hottest joint along Washington Street's stretch of clubs, which hosts some of the more epic dance nights around — including Sticky Fingers, Solstice Saturdays, and The Scenario. (Plus, Senbad and Salaz are widely considered to be kings of the local house scene, thanks to more than two decades of working the mixers.) And the Monarch Theatre, which opened in April, is the veritable crown jewel of their growing empire. They took old-and-busted hip-hop spot PHX Nightclub and gave it a thorough makeover by pimping out the décor, installing a boss PK Sound system, expanding the dance floor to 7,000 square feet, and constructing an enormous stage. Renowned artist Lalo Cota also created a unique monarch butterfly painting out front. Aiming to give downtown its biggest room dedicated solely to electronic dance music, they teamed up with local promoters Relentless Beats to bring in marquee-level talent. Thus far, they've packed the 500-person venue by featuring the likes of electro-popsters Designer Drugs, house heavyweight Satoshi Tomiie, and Grammy-nominated electronica vocalist Nadia Ali. Plans are afoot to bring in nationally known Latin acts and turn the Monarch's second floor into a swanky lounge, thus bringing even more bodies to their door. It's good being the kings.

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Don't let the fact that shows at the Yucca Tap Room are free fool you. The bar consistently books some of the best garage, power pop, punk, and metal acts in town, from touring stars like The Ataris and Radio Moscow to showcases from local stunners like Earthmen and Strangers and Avon Ladies. Things can get pretty wild at the Yucca, with bands often hopping off stage to roam the dance floor and bar (pop-punker Nobunny stood on the bar, wearing only a pair of briefs and a leather jacket), and that's part of the charm. You can wander in almost any night and find something crazy going down, and the selection of craft whiskeys at the Yucca's neighboring boutique bar certainly makes the decision that much easier.

The March shooting at a Nipsey Hussle show at the Clubhouse Music Venue in Tempe was a low point for the Valley hip-hop scene but hardly was indicative of the vibes cultivated by promoters like Sean Healy Presents and Universatile Music just down the street at Club Red/The Red Owl. The split club hosts punk, metal, and rock acts, too, but really shines with performances by hip-hop legends Phife Dawg of A Tribe Called Quest and Talib Kweli and buzzy up-and-comers like Big K.R.I.T. and Brooklyn rapper Action Bronson (the latter performed part of his set from the Club Red bathroom). The selections walk the thin line between arty backpack rap and street-credible and savvy bangers, but consistently prove that the city's hip-hop tastes run deep.

Local blues king Bob Corritore's long-running club turns 21 this year. That means it's old enough to drink legally, but something gives us the impression that the club has had a shot or two of the good stuff already. Corritore's mission to keep the blues flowing in Phoenix extends to his five-hour Sunday night blues radio show, Those Lowdown Blues, on local NPR affiliate KJZZ, but his dedication sweats it out on the stage, too. Each weekend, the club features some of Phoenix's finest, like Cold Shott and the Hurricane Horns, Bill Tarsha and The Rocket 88s, Tommy Dukes, George Bowman, and The Rhythm Room All-Stars (featuring Corritore on harmonica), as well as welcoming in traveling bluesmen like Shawn Pittman, Texas Red, and Arizona legend Hans Olson. They say it's all downhill after your 21st, but something tells us that the Rhythm Room's best days are still ahead.

The Herndon family has owned Handlebar J since 1975. In all those years, they've maintained a very simple policy: People like steaks and ribs, and they like country music. They've been giving Scottdale patrons exactly what they come for year after year. It's just a stone's throw from the bustling and flashy Old Town scene, and while you're certain to catch a few sparkly Ed Hardy T-shirts, Handlebar J fondly recalls the days when Scottsdale was known as "The West's Most Western Town." The latest dance moves might be practiced just a few blocks away, but on Handlebar J's sawdust-sprinkled floor it's all classic two-steps, and we're happy for the hoedown.

A whirlwind of change ensued inside Amsterdam over the past year, as its proprietors gave the glitzy gay and lesbian landmark a different look and a whole new groove. Its trademark marble pillars and Rodin-like naked male sculptures are still around, but most of the overstuffed couches and swanky furnishings were ditched to free up space for a larger dance floor, new DJ booth, and lighting elements. No longer considered a lounge (a role ceded to adjacent Club Miami), Amsterdam is now a full-on discothèque most nights a week, where high-energy dance music and Top 40 remixes are the norm. Muscle-bound go-go boys also frequently dance around in nothing but skivvies atop the Art Deco bar, which still serves more than 350 signature martinis and custom cocktails. The clientele also is largely LGBTQ, but an increasing number of straights have made this a weekend dancing destination, a fact that's acerbically discussed out on the smoking patio during catty conversations between regulars.

Despite their musclehead reputation, the doormen at local bars and clubs are pretty adroit at spotting fake IDs. In other words, members of the under-21 brigade might want to reconsider using their older siblings' faded driver's licenses to slip into some swank Scottsdale club. Instead of getting denied by beefy bouncers, or even reported to the cops, they instead head for all-ages affairs put on three nights a week at Afterlife. The liquor-free establishment offers many of the same nightlife thrills for those 18 and over as other Old Town joints (minus the alcohol, of course). If you dig dancing, scores of local DJs spin Top 40 remixes and electronica tracks in three rooms. If you're feeling competitive, arcade and casino games are available out on the patio. And for those gentlemen eager to throw their mack, go-go dancers and scantily clad ladies are in abundance during Afterlife's frequent theme parties. Even better, the place stays hopping until 4 a.m. every night it's open, which allows underage types to keep partying while the hard drinkers at most nearby bars have to call it a night.

A word to the wise: Don't try to slip a $20 to the doormen outside of Wild Knight, because it won't work. Bullying is just as ineffective as bribing, because attempting to intimidate or accost them is more likely to get you in handcuffs instead of inside the club. They've got their own system of who gets to be lucky enough to party inside this exclusive Saddlebag Trail nightclub, and it usually involves selecting only the hottest or best-dressed chicas. The hulking guardians of the velvet ropes also keep out most photographers (with the exception of some select professional shutterbugs), as management prefers to keep what happens inside on the down-low. It's also why there aren't any windows, save for the opaque panels on the doors of the tiny outdoor patio. It helps add to the clandestine aura of the place, which has also developed a reputation for being one of the biggest hotspots for electronica in the Valley, thanks to the array of EDM superstars who have performed here, like Rebecca and Fiona, The Bingo Players, and Zedd. Skrillex reportedly induced a major riot at an after-party held in his honor last year at the club when the entire crowd lost their shit during his stint on the mixers. It was definitely a wild evening at Wild Knight.

It's been an important year for the cats behind The Blunt Club. At the beginning of the summer, they celebrated the 10th birthday of the long-running Thursday night affair, marking a full decade of bringing hip-hop music and culture to the masses. The party served as both a major milestone and a major rager, taking place over the course of two nights at both Tempe's Yucca Tap Room and Hollywood Alley in Mesa. It also marked the brief return of Organic, who pulled a Prodigal Son and temporarily resumed his role as one of the night's resident DJs for a few weeks alongside Pickster One. They also added a few new painters (such as Loopy and Ray Rivas) into the potent weekly mix of fly artwork, b-boy dancing, turntable artistry, and funky grooves, which is accentuated by the diverse array of touring underground rappers and hip-hop artists who stop by for guest performances almost every Thump Day. The Bluntsters show no signs of slowing down, and — in all likelihood — have enough swagger and skills to go for another 10 years or more.

Hate to break it to you, club kiddies, but Skrillex didn't invent dubstep. While the cutesy-pie electronica producer helped light the match that caused the bass-heavy genre to explode in popularity in the past couple of years, dubstep's been around for more than a decade now. Just ask the cats behind long-running club night UK Thursdays, who were blasting bass long before Skrillex launched into the limelight. Since its debut in 2009, the weekly dance party has showcased a wide variety of dubstep artists from throughout the Valley and around the globe, each of whom offers a different take on the diverse British-born genre. In addition to the sort of brutal grinds and killer drops typified by the "brostep" generated by Skrillex and his ilk, the event has featured the more ambient flavors of dubstep, as well as such closely related variants as drum 'n' bass and UK garage. Locals like Sluggo, J. Paul, and ill-legal have been featured, as have such influential heavy hitters as 12th Planet, Rusko, 16-Bit, and BBC One's Mary Anne Hobbs. Pounding the walls of School of Rock with sub-harmonic thrum every Thursday, the night has helped give new meaning to the term "Thump Day."

DJ Dana Armstrong and her Valley Fever crew are stuck in the past, when country music didn't mean Toby Keith and Taylor Swift. That stuff's fine if you're looking for a little pop pleasure, but if you're looking for the hard stuff — the Waylons and Willies — Valley Fever (every Sunday night) at the Yucca is the only night for you. In addition to hosting live retro-country acts (both of the touring and local variety), Armstrong and her pal DJ Johnny Volume (who knows his way around the dusty "country section" of the record store as well as he does the punk 45s) spin classic outlaw stuff, the kind of gritty, pedal-steel whining music you won't hear on KMLE or at city slicker Scottsdale spots.

The gorgeously gauche atmosphere of Sanctum is often a prowling ground for curiously dressed creatures of the night, whether it's the grotesque goths who come for Tranzylvania or the tattooed-and-pierced freaks who frequent Doom Disco. Wednesdays, however, are the domain of the industrial-music rivetheads, who put on their big boots, leather pants, and quasi-military gear before stomping over to Sanctum to get their ears assaulted at :Fallout.Shelter:. Crimson-haired femme fatale Defense.Mekanizm and punky partner Self.Destrukt serve as audio taskmasters, dispensing driving industrial dance hits from the elevated DJ booth. Besides the relentless grind of Front 242, the gloom of Velvet Acid Christ, or the harsh onslaught of Front Line Assembly, the pair are known to rain down plenty of EBM and some dark electro.

Local selector DJentrification doesn't do things the easy way; while plenty of DJs are content to cue up the laptop, press play, and then start hitting on girls in the audience, DJent is a strictly vinyl kind of guy, meaning his sprawling sets are filled with the kind of music you can't snag easily from the iTunes store. His weekly party at FilmBar, "The Palace," follows the same set of no-rules rules. Mixing Thai, Turk, Khmer, Latin, Indian, and more, Djentrification has the most unique dance night in Valley music, and guest spinners like DJ Smite, Daniel Chiazza, and El Nico keep things significantly fresh, strange, off-kilter, and always funky.

The word hipster has taken a pretty heavy beating in recent years, becoming the buzz word for someone looking to talk smack about the kind of erudite, nattily dressed young people packing clubs like Bar Smith. But the reigning mixers at Sticky Fingers, William Fucking Reed, Prince$$, 2 Tone Disco, and more aren't about to let that stop them from appealing to, well, hipsters. Bringing in guest selectors like Andy Rourke of The Smiths, the members of VHS or Beta, and Poolside, Reed and his band of miscreants keep things excruciatingly hip. Make fun of the pants or the shoes or the hats (okay, really, make fun of the hats), but just remember: While you're complaining about the cool kids, the cool kids are dancing without you.

Wanna shake a tail feather or show off your skills as a dance diva? This Scottsdale institution features two distinct clubs in one stylish package, each rocking its own unique vibe and musical styles. Axis is the domain of Top 40 and R&B hits, where music videos are projected onto a giant screen overhead and dancing is done on a long catwalk-like runway and stage. Dope moves like the Dougie also are unleashed anywhere else that people can find space within the often crowded milieu, including the stairs leading up to the VIP section or out on the patio. Over at Radius, however, the much larger dance floor is alive with a maelstrom of activity as DJs drop house and electro remixes, go-go dancers bump and grind their barely clothed torsos on elevated platforms, and pneumatic jets fire streams of carbon dioxide from the ceiling. Here's hoping you slapped on some extra body spray beforehand, as the tempestuous movement of hot bods often results in a sweaty situation.

Ostensibly, the emergency lights adorning the Phoenix Police Department's fleet of patrol vehicles were designed to alert motorists to danger or force them to pull over. On a chilly night in early January, however, these red and blue flashing devices were used for a purpose that was entirely more fun. Namely, serving as multicolored strobe lights that illuminated countless revelers engaged in a major rager throughout downtown. It was all part of the Phoenix edition of the Decentralized Dance Party, a touring event that has staged massively madcap mobile fiestas in cities across North America since 2010. Organized by Vancouver-based party promoters Gary Lachance and Tom Kuzma, the event — which essentially is a chaotic costumed rave crossbred with a flash mob and spontaneous street party — made its Valley debut and brought out hundreds eager to shake a tailfeather. Participants, many of whom sported wacky attire, clutched boomboxes blasting a soundtrack of party rock anthems broadcast from a mobile FM transmitter worn by Lachance. Officers from Phoenix P.D. were hired to escort the throng, which slowly moved from the Arizona Science Center to Civic Space Park. It was big-time fun for those in attendance, to say the least. Heck, we even saw members of Phoenix's finest crack a smile or bob their heads to such songs as the Beastie Boys' "Fight for Your Right."

A word of warning: The house music laid down by Thomas Turner and Timothy Heit isn't necessarily for everyone. Like, if you're a typically ADD-ridden club kid who impatiently expects the DJ to bump a new song into the mix every minute, that just ain't Turner and Heit's bag. Instead, they craft epic and sophisticated soundscapes by expertly blending together just the right amount of house, electro, and trance tracks with mixing wizardry and beat-matching prowess. Separately, each has an area of expertise: Heit's a major gearhead who handles all the equipment and technical aspects of the partnership. Meanwhile, Turner's a dialed-in cat who promotes EDM events under the Relentless Beats banner and constantly gets the duo fresh material to use via his connections with a wealth of artists, producers, and DJs throughout the world. Together, Turner and Heit's tracks and mixes have gained them some serious respect from some of the biggest DJs in the business, including John Digweed, Sander Kleinenberg, and Ferry Corsten.

Sean Watson has an immense following among young-and-hip circles because of his innate skills as a party instigator and near-infallible taste in music. Plus, his weekly sets at such fashionable spots as Crescent Ballroom typically are packed with the PBR brigade, and he's an occasional performer at Quincy Ross' secretive see-and-be-seen soirees. Ask the burly and bearded DJ about his revered status in the scene, however, and the ever-affable Watson will shrug it off with one of his trademark belly laughs. "I'm a hipster icon?" he says. "I thought I was toothless, fat, Irish guy who sweats a lot." That pretty much sums up Watson to a T, concerned more with having a good time during his gigs than with labels. He's practically a one-man party behind the decks, bouncing his brawny frame around while unapologetically playing whatever tracks suit him, whether its indie song chanteuses like Grimes, old '90s joints from Stereolab, high-energy club bangers by Swedish House Mafia, or such guilty pleasures as Madeon or Gigamesh. "My philosophy is to just play whatever I like and hope that everyone goes along with it," he says. Based on all the fist-pumping and excited dancing going on in the crowd, that's most assuredly the case.

With the sound of witch house infecting adventurous indie and EDM listeners, it's a good time to be a goth DJ. Not that DJ Noiz.fkr is a Johnny-come-lately. Noiz.fkr (real name: Rob Poe) long has been spinning EBM (electronic body music), industrial, synthpop, and New Wave (all with a dark bent) at clubs like Sanctum, various fetish balls, and the dearly departed club night Tranzylvania at Palazzo. As EDM explodes in popularity, it makes sense that dancers will start seeking more extreme forms of sound, and Noiz.fkr's unique mixes — tuneful but booming — are exactly what the doctor ordered, the kind of sounds that work on the dance floor, no matter how shadowy the venue.

Believe it or not, it turns out that God loves dubstep. Or at least that's the humorous opinion of Jared Paul Jackson, better known by his DJ moniker J-Paul. Born to a devoutly Mormon family in Salt Lake City, the local EDM artist is certain that the Heavenly Father is a major fan of the unrelenting bass-heavy music that the 32-year-old creates. "I honestly believe that God and every other deity out there is a huge fan of dubstep," he says, laughing. Although his opinion might seem far-fetched, it also might explain why Jackson's been blessed with substantial DJ/producing skills, which allow him to conjure some of the most brutal dubstep soundscapes heard at Valley dance clubs. He specializes in transposing kinky beats and warbling vocals with the glitchy grinds and murderous drops that are the hallmark of the genre. The music tends to melt faces and assault eardrums, especially the tracks created with his Las Vegas-based partner OB-One, via their collective project HavocNdeeD. Together, the duo has performed in clubs throughout North America, had their face-melting tracks downloaded around the world, and have appeared on a few big-time compilations. We're sure the notorious G.O.D. would approve.

Influential Philadelphia-via-L.A. record label and blog Mad Descent, which is run by electro wizard Diplo, is something of a tastemaker in the music world that regularly sniffs out next-level shizzle to pimp to its fans. So when it started extolling the virtues of the moombahton mixes created by local DJ/producer team Jorge Melo and Dusty Hickman in 2011, not to mention booking them at a few club nights across the country, it was sort of a big deal. It was just one of many coups the pair have pulled off since they started dabbling with moombahton, the dembow-filled EDM subgenre (a popular hybrid of Dutch house and reggaeton created by Washington, D.C., selecta Dave Nada) three years ago. Melo and Hickman (a.k.a. Pickster One) were some of the earliest adopters of moombah both in Arizona and around the nation and earned plenty of attention with their first collaboration "Mas Poderoso," which scored spots on a few choice moombahton mixtapes. Last year, the two organized the epic Arizonaton compilation featuring seventeen tracks crafted by various local beat-jugglers. Moombah-heads worldwide dug it, and even Nada himself gave the project a thumbs up. Thankfully, Melo and Hickman aren't letting all this mad love go to their heads.

One of the most memorable moments from the most recent season of IFC sketch comedy satire Portlandia was a hilarious vignette in which it seemed literally everyone and his mother (including Carrie Brownstein's onscreen mother) was becoming a DJ. What's even funnier is the fact that it's totally true-to-life, as embryonic mixer monkeys and knob-twisters are springing up everywhere, including here the Valley. Unfortunately, a brand new MacBook and a pirated copy of Serato Scratch Live does not a DJ make. Actual talent is necessary, son, not to mention voluminous knowledge of a chosen genre, many years honing your craft, and learning the true fundamentals of turntablism, like maybe how to mix and scratch some actual records. In other words, you'll wanna follow the same path as Logan Howard. For more than a decade, the 30-something mixmaster known as Element has been considered one of the best hip-hop selectas in the PHX, if not the entire Southwest. A hardcore crate-digger at heart, Howard grew up devouring his family's diverse vinyl collection and started working a pair of record decks at house parties during high school. In the years since, he's become a walking encyclopedia of hip-hop culture and turntable wizardry, not to mention a longtime favorite the Valley's DJ scene. When's he not unleashing a sick scratch-fest or spinning old-school jams at joints around the Valley, Howard can be found hunting in local record stores for his latest finds or gigging in cities around the world (including Europe and Asia). Hell, he's even big in Japan.

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Ben Andersen and Eric Hoss have been full-on BFFs for the past four years, ever since meeting at a local club night in 2008 and bonding over a shared love of Photek and other deep-house artists. And the partnership that's developed between these bromantic DJs has resulted in some epic indie, electro, and dance-music mixes that have gotten a major reaction at hipster club nights throughout Phoenix and in the bedrooms of EDM bloggers around the globe. Collectively known as TABS, the pair create their tracks via cyberspace (since Anderson lives in Tucson and Hoss resides in Tempe), taking awesome tracks from such chart-topping EDM producers as Porter Robinson or Marco Carpentieri and making 'em even swankier. Both partners add in bold grooves, amp up the energy into the stratosphere, and drop in serious dollops of bass. TABS are equally adept at reinventing and reformatting indie pop hits from local acts like Peachcake and nationally known bands like Gossip, infusing each song with main room house and stylish remixing tricks. "They have an earnest capability to take a song from one place and bring it to another," says Peachcake frontman Stefan Pruett. "And ultimately, whichever direction they choose to take it, you'll end up liking it."

Alex Votichenko doesn't just collect records — he stockpiles them. When local filmmaker and blogger Gregory Harshfield interviewed the turntablist (who's better known by his nom de guerre Djentrification) for the online documentary Vinyl: A Phoenix Story, viewers got a glimpse inside Votichenko's Central Phoenix home, where an entire room is lined from floor to ceiling with haphazardly stacked milk crates and mismatched bookshelves overflowing with thousands of records. Thing is, that was only a small part of his entire collection. By his estimate, Votichenko (who also works as an artist and sells vegan burritos) has amassed an arsenal of thousands more, all of which serve as potential ammunition for his unforgettable and ultra-eccentric sets at nights like 602'sdays at Bikini Lounge.

Phoenix-based St Ranger crams more ideas into Life Coach, its five-song debut, than most bands manage to fit on full LPs. And what's more, the five-piece does it with style and ease, never feeling unnecessary or forced. The easy bounce of "Take Time" rolls with a soul-pop groove and pop-and-lock bass, and the Beach Boys-gone-math-rock of "It's 'Appening" pulses with a sly grin. Backed by The Color Group, St Ranger doesn't seem content to let local accolades be reward enough, keeping its nose to the grindstone and pushing harder. Color Group pressed Life Coach on vinyl, and the tight pop compositions have gained national attention from the blogosphere in Phoenix and beyond.

It hasn't taken long for 22-year-old Youceff Kabal — who makes beats that straddle the thin line separating chillwave, ambient hip-hop, and electronic pop — to establish himself as a presence on Phoenix stages alongside touring indie stars like Toro y Moi, Phantogram, and Youth Lagoon. Kabal's quick rise is due mostly to his way around a sample board, and he's made waves across the blogosphere with his own tunes and his remixes for groups like the Swedish collective Newtimers and Brooklyn's How to Dress Well. What Kabal does next — whether it's turning his attention to remixing and producing for local artists or taking the stage solo — only looks to further illustrate how far ahead of the curve he is.

This year has been a pretty damn good one for Guided by Voices fans. Not only did main man Robert Pollard reunite the "classic '93-'96 lineup" for three albums — Let's Go Eat the Factory, Class Clown Spots UFO, and the forthcoming Bears for Lunch (in addition to Mouseman Cloud, another in his torrential downpour of solo records), but the year saw the return of the nation's best GBV tribute band, Secret Fox. Featuring Jim Adkins (of Jimmy Eat World) and members of The Secret Lives of Painters, the band celebrated the return of Guided by Voices with a reunion gig of its own at Crescent Ballroom after 10 years of inactivity. The band didn't stick to the classic lineup repertoire alone, dipping into "Guided by Verde"-era power pop, too, but there were Pollard-style high kicks. Oh, yes, high kicks galore.

While the birthers and xenophobes who patrol the border might too easily forget it, Arizona is a land of transplants and exiles. Dig around and you're likely to find little pockets of culture from all around the globe in our neighborhoods and boroughs. Still, no one is going to blame you for being surprised by The Bad Cactus Brass Band, an honestly authentic New Orleans second-line-style brass combo. But the band does, indeed, call Phoenix home, musically transporting the sounds of Big Easy burgs like Treme and Central City to CenPho and Tempe gatherings. If only we could get someone to bring proper yaka mein to Phoenix, we'd be all set.

Bears of Manitou has drawn plenty of fans around Phoenix for its indie-folk tunes, but its members have managed to attract attention beyond that, staging the kind of interesting marketing stunts that get fans involved and laughing. A few days after the debut of Call-In Oates, a phone service that allowed fans to dial an 800-number and play some lo-fi selections from the oeuvre of blue-eyed soulsters Hall and Oates, the Tempe-based band quickly seized the fever, launching their own toll-free call-in line and even offering fans a chance to order customized songs through their Facebook pages. Any band can Tweet into the World Wide Black Hole — but bands like Bears of Manitou make the social marketing feel, well, social.

While everyone in the electronic game has tripped over themselves to call what they do something else — chillwave, dancecore, bit-pop — Mercurius FM has stuck stridently to his roots, calling his May 2012 mix This Is Techno. Mercurius routinely updates his blog with gloriously old-school remixes of artists like Usher, The Beastie Boys, Prince, and his own analog compositions. He's also quick to call out the status quo — in a recent blog post, he criticized the current rodent king of EDM, deadmau5, saying "producers like him have taken the skill and art of performance and cheapened it down to button-pressing." Mercurius doesn't position himself as better than anyone else, and that's the glory of it all: He simply doesn't have to.

Valley rock 'n' roll icon Keith Jackson has been ambling around Phoenix's music scene for more than two decades now. The genial 6-foot-6 guitarist, who skillfully wielded a six-string in such landmark bands as Beat Angels and Glass Heroes, has experienced plenty of wild misadventures during that time. Jackson's got the stories to prove it and is more than eager to spin some interesting yarn about the old days. In addition to having a gift for gab, he also has a certain penchant for slipping in mentions of the many rock stars that have crossed his path. Catch him at a preferred haunt, like the Eastside Tap & Grill, and Jackson will gladly dish over beers about Steve Jones from the Sex Pistols giving him a vintage Gibson Les Paul, all the times he's partied and recorded with former GN'R guitarist Gilby Clarke, or the gig where one of his old bands opened for the MC5. The most frequent topic of conversation, however, is his friendship with the late Joe Strummer. The local ax man often gets a goofy grin when he talks about how he idolized the legendary frontman for The Clash, who passed away in 2002, and their many hangout sessions. Jackson's tales are always told with a certain charm, so you don't seem to mind all his name-dropping. Shit, if our lives had been as exciting as his, we'd probably do the same.

When Steve Aoki and his cohorts from Dim Mak Records kicked off their DeadMeat tour at Comerica Theatre this past January, this all-star ensemble of EDM talent was backed by a massive stage setup rivaling that of major rock concerts. Millions of LED bulbs illuminated a towering backdrop and six-foot-tall DJ riser, as well as glow panels spelling out Aoki's name in bright lights during his headlining set. As flashy as this eye-catching orgy was, it wasn't as fun as when Dim Mak brought its previous tour to the open-air setting of Bar Smith's rooftop a few months earlier. Same goes for any other electronica artist who passes through the Valley. Flashy multimillion-dollar stage displays can't hold a candle to the more lo-fi thrills of watching EDM stars like electro fiends Blatta and Inesha perform against a backdrop of downtown Phoenix skyscrapers while stars twinkle overhead, warm breezes blow through, and abstract movie clips are projected on the wall over the rooftop bar. With all due respect to Bar Smith's next-door neighbor, this is the true sky lounge.

It seems everyone wants to spend a night at the Dollhouse, but there's never enough room. Hence the lengthy line of would-be clubgoers that seems to be a permanent fixture outside the front entrance. One of the reasons why people are desperate for a golden ticket into the glitzy Indian Plaza drink parlor is the desire to be seen by the many pairs of eyes that are about. Glamorous-looking gals debut their newest ensembles, accessorizing with a high-end cocktail or two created by the Dollhouse's resident mixologists. Pulsing light panels on the walls provide flattering illumination, permitting one to look their best should any celebs or pro athletes drop by the Dollhouse, which has been known to happen. Good thing the VIP section has a clear view of the dance floor, allowing the chance for you to strut your stuff whenever a member of the glitterati is in the house.

Of its many upscale amenities — resort-like cabanas, delicious Asian fusion small plates, the Swarovski crystal chandelier, and the always-mesmerizing LED cube — The Mint's best perk isn't one you'd find touted on its website: the attention-grabbing clientele. Scope out the danceteria's typical Friday and Saturday mix and you're guaranteed to spy practically every niche of the Scottsdale crowd parading through. High-octane eye candy and hot bods are everywhere out on the patio, not to mention such clubgoing curiosities as dudes sporting Stunna shades like they're Jay-Z, hipsters in bowties and porkpies, and a few roaming bachelorette parties armed with squirtguns and feather boas. The ebb and flow of the dancing and romancing scene underneath glowing crossbeams usually features girls grinding on one another and at least three human trainwrecks in Forever 21 attempting to go-go dance atop VIP couches. While the cover charges at The Mint vary, the floor show's always free.

The art of seduction is a tricky one to master, which is probably why there've been enough books written about picking up the opposite sex to fill an entire library. One thing is certain: It helps to have the odds stacked in your favor, which is why we recommend marshaling the wingmen and testing out your game at American Junkie. There's a distinct libidinous atmosphere to the place, which is where dudes and dames in the 'Dale go to get down and hook up. Everyone's inhibitions seem to get checked at the door, fleeting glances and flirtatious behavior are the norm, and the bartenders constantly cajole girls to spin the wheel of booze for free shots. The small dance floor offers the excuse to get close to that certain someone and conduct a vertical expression of a horizontal desire. And if you do get lucky, there are fleets of cabs waiting outside for a quick getaway to either your place or theirs. A few even offer free rides back to your car the next day, which should make the dreaded morning escape a bit easier.

Ever wonder why your head is filled with fuzzy recollections on the morning after a big-time bender? To paraphrase Jamie Foxx, you can blame it on the alcohol. See, the neurons populating the hippocampus region of your brain — specifically, the ones responsible for memory formation — don't take kindly to last night's orgy of alcohol. (They don't call 'em "mind erasers" for nothing, yo.) Good thing the folks over at Smashboxx offer the opportunity to remember what sort of intoxicated (and potentially embarrassing) antics you engaged in during the previous evening. Tucked away in the corner of the Scottsdale danceteria is the closet-size HotBoxx video booth, which allows patrons to record all manner of memorably bad drunken high jinks. The club's proprietors post monthly compilations of the best (and worst) of the HotBoxx, on both YouTube and its website, which is filled with human trainwrecks, off-key singing, sloppy makeout sessions, and a variety of naughty bits being exposed. Smashboxx even offers prizes for the most memorable videos, which might help soothe the sting of embarrassment from watching yourself acting the fool on the Internet.

It's apropos that this Scottsdale hot spot resides in a former fire station, considering the fact that four-alarm fiestas happen in the joint practically every single evening it's open for business. Its interior typically contains a throng of stylishly dressed revelers who flock here during Old Town's peak partying hours, from 11 p.m. onward on weekend nights. Things get even more packed, however, after last call, as the Firehouse is a popular after-hours destination for the nightlife crowd that migrates here after other clubs have locked their doors. And even though the bartenders have to cease serving firewater at 2 a.m., there's still plenty to do besides tying one on. Patrons eager to stay up late can play games of giant Jenga and cornhole, engage in people-watching and flirtatious behavior, and get bodies rocking to killer dance tracks laid down by some of the best DJs in the local club scene (including the ultra-talented Death to the Throne and house music guru Jon Amaral) until 4 a.m. Screw the Sandman; there's dancing and debauchery to be had.

Although he's way too cool to ever sport an elf hat, photographer Quincy Ross is pretty much the Peter Pan of the downtown Phoenix art scene. It's partially because the enigmatic artist and bon vivant seems perpetually young at heart despite pushing 40. Mostly, though, it's because of his habit of leading local hipsters, creative types, and party fiends on jaunts into a nighttime Neverland via his arty after-hours parties. Every six weeks or so, Ross will announce on either Facebook or Twitter that he and his "Q-Squad" will be staging a clandestine craic at an unspecified venue sometime in the next 48 hours. Though details often are scant — usually requiring sending a text to Ross to get a password and other pertinent info — and admission is selective, one thing is certain: It's going to be an affair to remember, likely involving imbibing and all manner of immoral behavior lasting into the next day. Last New Year's Eve, for example, they took over the top two floors of the now-defunct Lexington Hotel and partied hard for more than 24 hours straight. No joke. It was a fete and feat that isn't likely to be topped anytime soon.

Scottsdale restaurateur Pavle Milic is on a mission to make Arizona wine. He's teamed up with Todd and Kelly Bostock of Dos Cabezas Winery to collaborate on a special blend of tempranillo, primitivo, and syrah grapes. He invited us down to Elgin for the first harvest of 2012. At 4 a.m. So don't take that bottle of wine for granted, people, because Milic, Bostock, and a handful of others were, indeed, up before the crack of dawn to pick these grapes. Not only that, they tested the acid and sugar levels of each grape variety, separated the grapes, and loaded them into the press to start the fermentation process. And that's just the beginning. Milic's wine will be ready in the fall of 2013. He's been documenting the process for New Times' food blog, Chow Bella (www.phxfood.com) and you can catch our conversation with him at www.phoenixnewtimes.com/bestof2012

Don't get us wrong; we applaud anyone who knows how to play a mean guitar. But we must say, we're even more impressed by someone who knows how to build one. Chances are good that if they do, they learned it at the Roberto-Venn School of Luthiery. Since 1975, Roberto Venn has been attracting students of all makes and models: high school graduates, aspiring musicians, retired guitar enthusiasts, and even those who already know a thing or two about being a luthier. They come from all over the globe to commit to an intensive 10-hour-a-day, five-day-a-week, five-month semester of certified higher learning in the art of luthiery.

Smart, sassy, super-cute, and a master of her cocktail craft, Shel Bourdon is the gal behind the outstanding cocktail menu at CityScape's Blue Hound Kitchen at the Palomar Hotel. The 24-year-old mixologist and lead bartender created the restaurant's entire menu of handcrafted cocktails that are classic, down-to-earth, and, most important, drinkable. The California transplant's creations are the perfect complement to executive chef Stephen Jones' exquisite comfort food, and Shel or one of her well trained bartenders are always happy to give you cocktail pairing suggestions. Try one of Shel's beer cocktails like the Screaming Scot with grouse blended scotch, honey syrup, lemon, egg white, espresso, and wheat ale or a hangover pick-me-up like the refreshing Absinthe Fizz with Beefeater gin, Pernod absinthe, lime, honey, and cucumber. Straightforward and classy — just like Bourdon.

Husband-and-wife team Bill and Lillian Buitenhuys are more than just cocktail enthusiasts — they are straight-up cocktail scientists. The pair has been making their own infused bitters for the past couple of years in their Gilbert kitchen, experimenting with flavors ranging from a bright herb orange in the Orange Sunshine to the warm and sweet Figgy Pudding. Using as many locally sourced and indigenous ingredients as possible, the Buitenhuyses make extremely small batches of their cocktail highlighters in mason jars that sit for about a month. Fruit, bittering agents, simple syrups, booze, and spices all mingle together to create the end result. The couple received the green light from the U.S. Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau to market their bitters as a food product, so their products should be hitting the local shelves sometime in mid-November. Until then, be on the lookout for the little eyedroppers of bitters behind the bars of several restaurants around town. (We could tell you who's using Bill and Lillian's liquid gold, but then we'd have to kill you.)

All anyone could talk about after this year's Coachella Festival of Music and Arts was Tupac, an artist 16 years in the grave (despite all that buzzy clatter you hear to the contrary). Pac was resurrected by AV Concepts, an audio-visual company based in Tempe and San Diego. They utilized a Musion Eyeliner screen and a 30-by-13-foot project screen to create a 3D, true-to-lifesize projection of Pac in the midst of Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg's set. It was a stunning, freakishly life-like performance, and while it went down in the history books as one of the most surprising moments in Coachella history (well, the first weekend anyway), it immediately set off rumors of copycat holograms, like Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes with TLC and Freddie Mercury with Queen. AV Concepts, you've worked up some strange feelings for us all (could a Beatles reunion be far behind?), but the trick was a stunning one, indeed.

Barry Schwartz deals in volts and watts. The local artist and electricity aficionado creates large-scale installations and hosts experimental performance pieces, of sorts, with found and donated electrical equipment and high-voltage results. He was once a bigwig overseas, where he installed large-scale pieces in Germany, but nowadays, you can find him tinkering around and testing sockets at the Icehouse in downtown's Warehouse District, where he hopes to open the city's first electricity-themed bar. Countless elements of Shocklick Lounge will rely on electricity, Schwartz says, while testing shock-sending benches and pulling bottles along long conveyer belts. Schwartz has hosted a few late-night parties there, but the space is far from finished — he says he still has a lot of experiments to run and equipment to move around. Shocking.

John Cavanagh's been crafting small batches of tonic (as in "gin and") since 2008, but the heady elixir really took off this year, with a glowing Wall Street Journal writeup and a New Times Big Brain culinary award. The concentrated syrup's easy to ship and store — simply add soda water to reconstitute. Snag some on the spot at sister cafés Tuck Shop and Astor House and, as Cavanagh suggests, carry it around to mix your own drinks in bars. It also makes an ultra-classy gift for friends who are good hosts, those who like local and natural products, or anybody who's damn picky about their gin and doesn't want to fuck it up.

The interior of the Nina Mason Pulliam Rio Salado Audubon Center in South Phoenix tends to be filled with people during the evening hours on every third Thursday of month. Why are they here? The answer is twofold: sex and cheap beer. Both enticements are a major part of the monthly Birds 'n' Beer event. Valley residents pack folding chairs inside the main building of the riparian preserve to fill their bellies with brew and their brains with science. It's a hopped-up scientific soiree that gets plenty silly at times, and it benefits the center's educational and wildlife preservation programs. Attendees can snag cans of Four Peaks craft brews Hop Knot IPA and Kilt Lifter for a $2 donation. After an hour-long mixer among the nature displays in the lobby, everyone grabs a seat for an informative — and typically cheeky — lecture from guest speakers and local scientists on any number of topics. Much of the time, the subject pertains to the sex lives and mating habits of such flora and fauna as sea lions, frogs, plants, or pretty much anything else that reproduces, as well as the occasional oration on bird nesting or the flight patter of bats. Needless to say, the brew-infused, often-humorous nature presentations have become incredibly popular with the public, as a diverse crowd of granola-crunching nature lovers, swanky urbanites, bookish geeks, and curious retirees turn out to learn tidbits concerning courting behavior or watch footage of sea life doing what comes naturally. All that's missing is Marvin Gaye crooning "Let's Get It On."

What our brains do while we're asleep has been studied in labs by researchers and sleep experts for decades. Our brain waves have been charted, our twitches, snores, and movements documented, and our dreams written down for use in studies around the globe. But until recently, scientists have been hesitant to research and document lucid dreaming, which differs from conventional dreaming in that the person who is asleep is aware he or she is dreaming and can control and redirect what's happening in the dream (as opposed to being an observer). The science of lucid dreaming and how our brains ultimately can control what happens in our dreams is now debated ad nauseam in the science world, as it's associated with dream-obsessed wack-jobs and fans of films such as Waking Life and Inception, but it's also an activity encouraged by a variety of sleep psychologists who cite a broadening of the imagination and an increase of awareness in daily life.