Inside the foyer of Greg Crane’s north Scottsdale office suite, there’s a niche in the wall facing the front door. It holds a small, fake plant and a proverb inside a clear, plastic frame. Every weekday morning, one of the women who works for Crane replaces the proverb from the…
Every week, estranged spouses ask Maricopa County court commissioner Pete Reinstein to make “emergency” rulings for them in child-custody quarrels. Says Reinstein, “They come rushing in before the custody orders are completed, and they’ll say something like, ‘Hubby or wife is out doing drugs, and he or she shouldn’t be…
Humble John Curmudgeons in Arkansas insist on calling Bill Clinton “Slick Willie.” As he is swept toward the White House by a fawning mainstream media, Arizonans may come to call U.S. Senator John McCain “Humble John.” The new and improved, under-control presidential wanna-be put on his best, golly-gee-I’m-just-button-poppin’-proud-to-be-an-ex-POW-cum-Arizona-senator act for…
The Paradise Valley Unified School District is learning the hard way about how state government works in Arizona. The lesson school officials say they’ve learned: If you’re a multibillion-dollar foreign corporation looking to put a toxic-chemical-using plant in pristine desert, Arizona will bend over backward for you. If you’re a…
Saturday, October 11. Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of atonement. It’s also this year’s National Coming Out Day, though the two aren’t related as far as any of us know. I hope the temples have a better turnout than the Coming Out Dance at the Valley of the Sun Gay…
In 15 years, about 400 people died in a small room in Reverend Sky Guadagno’s coral-colored house in South Phoenix. After each death, Reverend Sky would sponge off the corpse with soapy water and hum melodies to comfort the soul Reverend Sky suspected lingered in the death room. Once the…
Gimme (Tax) Shelter Concerning the article by John Dougherty about the economics of Fife Symington (“Fife’s Myth,” October 9): This is one of the few times that I have found a serious omission in factual data in an article in New Times. As a disabled person living on a limited…
Unlike Bobby Cooper, I haven’t had two of my fingers cut off. And I’m not driving a red ’64 Mustang that’s about to blow a hose. But, like the character played by Sean Penn in Oliver Stone’s U-Turn, I’m heading for Superior. It’s 60 miles from Phoenix, which sounds longer…
Hats Off Being a great fan of the BBC import Chef!, I was happy to see the article by M. V. Moorhead (“One Toque Over the Line,” September 25) about this largely ignored show. During the first two seasons, I told everyone I know that Chef! was my favorite show…
In his first State of the State address in 1992, Governor J. Fife Symington III–as new chief executives are wont to do–anointed himself the Education Governor, the Environment Governor, the Children’s Governor. The three-cornered prospectus promised an optimistically vast range of areas he would improve. Last month as Symington exited…
Punch the words “Fife Symington” and “tax cuts” into a popular-newspaper database, and more than 1,000 articles will be cited. The articles, most of them from the Arizona Republic, invariably attribute Arizona’s robust economy to Symington’s strong support of personal income tax cuts during his six-year tenure as governor. “Governor…
One year after taking over as president of Glendale Community College, Tessa Martinez Pollack is under fire from faculty senate members who question a proposed policy that cost her her previous job in Miami, Florida. Her economic-development proposal for the west Valley has also raised questions about what role her…
Anne Does AZ The Flash hung with Princess Anne during her visit to the Valley last week. (Don’t believe the pictures: It really wasn’t Prince Charles in drag.) At the Herberger Theater Center for the Royal National Theatre’s Othello, the Flash sat within whispering range of the Royal Anne and…
A few days before Christmas 1955, Artie Martinez took off his clothes and went for a stroll. Sheriff’s deputies found Martinez–a 27-year-old deaf man–wandering incoherently near 52nd Street and McDowell. Not surprisingly, he wound up at the Arizona State Hospital. Martinez wasn’t charged with a crime, never has been. Nonetheless,…
Bestiality! Incest! Torture! Golden showers! All things considered, the job just wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. “As if that were not enough, the money sucks!” gripes the ex-phone-sex operator, a woman whose daily workload resembled a verbal version of Marv Albert’s datebook. While her complaints are reminiscent…
If Scottsdale Waterfront South Associates wins the right to rebuild 23 prime acres of the city, it’s because of the group’s qualifications, not its connections, city officials say. The fact that Ken Allen, the group’s principal architect, is on the city board which will award the contract doesn’t matter, Allen…
Imagine this: The person you love has AIDS. He’s also in prison for theft. They’re not going to let him out, even though the person he stole from didn’t want him to go to prison. Even though the person he stole from married him after he went to prison. Imagine…
Looking for Mr. Good Bar Unhappy with the service at his present haunt, The Flash is putting out a Request for Proposal to gin-mill owners. Please respond if your saloon meets the following criteria: Your dive is so slow, you’d be grateful to have groupings of besotted New Times writers…
Stars in Their Eyes As an amateur astronomer with a dog-eared copy of the Celestial Handbook, I found Tony Ortega’s article about Robert Burnham Jr. extremely poignant (“Sky Writer,” September 25). Many amateur astronomers would be interested in reading about a man who contributed so much to our enjoyment. Bill…
The old man who sold paintings of cats in Balboa Park entered San Diego’s Mercy Hospital on March 9, 1993. He was dying of congestive heart failure, the result of a heart attack that he’d suffered weeks earlier. Although he was only 61, his years in the park had prematurely…
He’s guilty, he’s out of office, and he’s out of the country. The mainstream press last saw our fraudulent former governor getting off a plane in Miami. Speculation about his whereabouts is rampant. New Times has learned that Fife employed a series of ingenious disguises to give the slip to…
So That’s How She Got Her Job! A reader grateful that the Flash featured KPNX-TV Channel 12 anchor Jineane Ford’s role as a scantily clad, stuttering bimbo in 1983’s Chattanooga Choo Choo recently volunteered videotape of another local TV journalist doing her all for the sake of entertainment. The tape…
