“Hold on, I just took my pants off–it’s kinda hot in here!” This is what Les Payne yells from inside the camper that rides piggyback in the bed of his ’83 Chevy Custom Deluxe pickup that sits on the sloping edge of a dirt parking lot in Nothing, Arizona. According…
Sentence Fragments I must state that the “Letters From Jail” story (December 5) really hit home with me. I’ve been there and done it, trust me when I say that it’s all true, and then some. It is quite a system that “Uncle Joe” Arpaio has come up with. The…
A decade ago, it was perhaps the ultimate experience for an American Anglophile: What better way to indulge one’s fascination for things English than to join one of that country’s most storied, exclusive clubs? To become a “Name” at Lloyd’s of London–to become an investor in the 300-year-old insurance institution–gave…
The stoop-shouldered man slouches behind a coffee table that is really a marijuana table. It practically bows beneath the collective weight of pot and things pot-related. The place looks like Cheech and Chong’s version of the afterlife. On the table, bags of pot and a jar brimming with half-smoked joints…
In an unprecedented action that runs counter to some available evidence, the state’s top liquor regulator has ordered a Tempe nightclub to close, based partially on criminal allegations that the county attorney deemed unworthy of prosecution. Late last month, Howard Adams, director of Arizona’s Department of Liquor Licensing and Control,…
The State Bar of Arizona has asked a retired judge to investigate allegations of sexual harassment against Bruce Hamilton, the agency’s longtime executive director. On Monday, Bar officials confirmed rumors that have circulated widely in Arizona’s legal community since a heated Board of Governors meeting November 22: Hamilton is on…
Those Amazing (Former) Suns While the Phoenix Suns are emerging from their torpor–Danny Ainge’s pained pouts apparently making all the difference–The Flash can’t help but marvel at the excellent team the Suns have fielded for other NBA franchises. Consider this lineup: Charles Barkley (41 minutes per game for the Rockets,…
The other night I went to see a preview of the new Milos Forman film The People vs. Larry Flynt. It’s a good movie. It’s got God and sex and romance and tragedy and struggle. You know–I laughed, I cried, it was better than Cats. But I’m no critic, and…
Pronghorns of a Dilemma I never cease to be amazed at the media’s propensity toward slanted coverage of subjects that would seem to much better serve the public if offered in a more objective manner (“Boom, Boom on the Range,” Jeremy Voas, November 21). I found it particularly instructive to…
Early in 1995, Mary Simmerer stumbled upon an alarming situation. Simmerer, who manages a section of the Arizona Department of Environmental Quality that monitors compliance with drinking-water regulations, discovered that on one day–November 24, 1994–the city of Scottsdale served approximately 70,000 of its citizens drinking water containing illegal levels of…
Germaine Steudler was arrested on September 19 for a probation violation. What follows are excerpts from her journal. 9/26/96: Awakened at 1 a.m. and asked what size pants and shirt I needed for court. The guard returned a half an hour later . . . we were shackled together and…
PNI Confidential The Flash has often noted that the Arizona Republic seems intent on offending nobody but its readers. Now Phoenix Newspapers Inc. employees have been chillingly reminded that they are not to offend anyone inside the company, either. In a company memo titled “Electronic Messaging Policy,” PNI employees are…
Game Plan Most interesting article on the Luke Air Force Base/Goldwater Gunnery Range and the Sonoran pronghorn antelope (“Boom, Boom on the Range,” Jeremy Voas, November 21). As I read, no fewer than a dozen (in groups of two) F-16’s screamed over my abode in Surprise. Sometimes, on really clear…
Something felt awful and familiar as I strolled toward the set of Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s latest made-for-TV movie (Charred Riots of Fire, MCSO Studios, 1996) when it began shooting at the Durango Jail a couple of weeks ago. The unsavory sense of deja vu had something to do with the…
A fellow I knew used to spout the theory that, based on a kind of friends-of-co-workers-of-friends network, you were always just three phone calls away from the president of the United States. As of last weekend, I can do that one better. I was one phone call away from God…
Time is one thing prisoners have plenty of. What to do with all that time? When they’re not conjuring diabolical plots to steal county-issued underwear, some of them write to us. What follows is a mere sampling of the prose, poems, diatribes, sketches (there’s even a “restaurant review”) sent to…
For most of us, getting ready for the holidays means whipping up a batch of Chex mix, hacking up a Hickory Farms beef log and hoping that this year’s monthlong ordeal will pass as quickly and as painlessly as possible. But when it comes to Christmas, twin brothers Bob and…
Joe Young lives in a modest brick house with a broken garage door. The garage itself doubles as Young’s paint-spattered studio, where the Arizona State University art history professor stores the product of his years as an artist. Dozens of canvases stacked vertically around the room track the history of…
It’s the party line since the Tent City riot: Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his detention officers blame problems in the jails on understaffing and, more to the point, underfunding by the Maricopa County Board of Supervisors. The sheriff complains that he can’t afford more $21,000-a-year detention officers; however, just weeks…
Smile, You’re on Convict Camera KNXV-TV Channel 15 could hardly contain itself last week. With its futuristic promo machine set on full-tease, the station announced its latest journalistic coup: Tony Kovaleski had gone undercover at Sheriff Joke Arpaio’s jails just days before the Tent City riot! That’s right, only days…
Television reporters called in live broadcasts from the Durango Jail complex last Wednesday night when it looked as though a second riot at Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s famous Tent City jail had started. It was the first evening inmates were in the jail since the initial riot on Sunday, November 17…
Here in the Valley of the Sun, the names “Fife” and “Joe” are not synonymous with “happiness” and “joy.” Though the respective physical appearances of these men may be enough to bring about an occasional smirk, their actions aren’t funny at all. In fact, our governor and sheriff seem to…
