New Zoning Rules Irk Developers

Phoenix’s effort to revamp its thirty-year-old zoning code, an undertaking aimed at weaving the city’s haphazard growth into the patterns laid out by the city’s general plan, is running into a not-so-slight obstacle: developers. No group has demonstrated more interest in the code’s revision, and the developers trumpet their enthusiasm…

Urban Stress Kills Canyon’s Cottonwoods

Tens of thousands of raw-footed hikers who’ve trudged into the Grand Canyon to Phantom Ranch know what a relief it is to finally collapse in the shade of the famous campground’s giant cottonwood trees. Until last fall, though, no one realized that the trees themselves could use a little relief…

King For A Night

Strutting around outside the Holiday Inn ballroom on Saturday night in his immaculate jeweled jumpsuit, Little Elvis appears momentarily oblivious to the trappings that have temporarily transformed the motel lobby into a reasonable facsimile of Heartbreak Hotel. He blocks out the big-screen TV where a braying Shelley Winters is doing…

DeConcini’s Loco Approach To Rico

When it comes to cases of fraud, there’s no question where Dennis DeConcini stands. Arizona’s senior senator has been busy this past week trying to get his colleagues to gut the federal Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act. If DeConcini is successful, it will tie the hands of consumers and…

Trees And Bulldozers In Sedona

In the New Age capital of Sedona, the great outdoors is a precious commodity. Red cliffs and lush greenery make the land one of the state’s most beautiful spots for tourists and day-tripping city folk. For others the attraction goes deeper. Sedona is world famous as a metaphysical “hot spot,”…

Cheap Shots

What do you do if the big boys won’t put your TV channel on cable and you’re limited to a low-power antenna on South Mountain? You try to get your hands on a real TV station. That’s what BILL SAURO, president of KUSK in Prescott (CHANNEL 27 in Phoenix) is…

Party Animal

Here–in all their pure, unexpurgated horror–are the three ugliest words you can hear after you’ve accepted a dinner-party invitation: “Grandma can’t baby-sit.” If just reading that sentence didn’t soak your shorts in cold sweat, you either don’t have a four-year-old, your four-year-old doesn’t have a grandma, or you’re never invited…

The Worst Of Times

Here’s how stupid Phoenix looked in the worldwide broadcast of the Grand Prix by ESPN. After commercial breaks, the sports network used a cartoon logo of the Phoenix skyline. A howling cartoon coyote was identified by the broadcasting boob as “a wolf.” This desert critter was then replaced by an…

That Goes On Behind Closed Doors?

There were great sighs of relief at City Hall Monday. Now we can get this damn thing off our backs was the prevailing sentiment in the offices of Mayor Terry Goddard and Councilwoman Linda Sue Nadolski. For months, the two had been fighting off charges that someone–and each accused the…

Firefighter Paralyzed

A Phoenix firefighter lies paralyzed from the waist down following a bizarre Memorial Day incident at a local hospital in which he fell and hit his head after he was given a painkilling injection. According to accounts by friends and fellow firefighters, Kenneth Gardiner, a 22-year-old ambulance driver, had gone…

Who Put This Pigskin In The Pork Barrel?

There’s nothing like the smell of pigskin to make Arizona politicos jump. State and city officials jumped through hoops for years as various NFL teams teased the Valley with the possibility of professional football. Nor were they deterred when teams like the Philadelphia Eagles and the Indianapolis Colts used the…

Business Was Booming

The munitions-plant explosion west of Buckeye last week that decapitated one man and injured two others came as no surprise to Sandy Coe-Davis. Three years ago, her husband Steve’s face was nearly blown off in a similar accident at a plant owned by the same man, Charles M. “Chuck” Byers…

The Earth First!

All four prisoners shuffled into the courtroom as though headed for the scaffold. They were handcuffed. They wore the baggy blue jail uniforms that make everyone appear guilty until proven innocent. None of the four could manage a smile. They were escorted to the defense table with the same caution…

Gender Bender

I don’t know why so many pregnant folks race to the nearest ultrasound machine the second their fetus is old enough to announce its gender. As far as I’m concerned, not knowing exactly what you’re getting is half the fun of pre-parenting. (The other half occurred during my wife’s final…

I Got My Mojo Talkin’

Mojo Nixon, currently, is God. He’s got a new record out that includes such bitchin’ songs as “Debbie Gibson Is Pregnant With My Two-Headed Love Chile,” he’s got a couple of videos on MTV, he’s got a major part in the new movie about Jerry Lee Lewis, and he’s going…

Stranger Than Fiction

Because you find yourself in trouble, you go to see an attorney. For almost two years you pour your heart out, plot strategy and reveal your most secret fears and schemes. Then you discover that your attorney wore a body bug which transmitted the conversations between the two of you…

The Wizard of Wickenburg

Build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door. Build a better clothes hanger and, well, you’d better hope the world has a compass, a four-wheel-drive vehicle and maybe even a can of javelina repellent. Actually, the man who hopes to revolutionize the country’s clothes…

Christian Crusade

Angel was preparing to join the dozen or so children who commit suicide each year in Arizona when someone heard her cry for help. At a moment when her despair was so deep that Angel felt as if the earth was closing over her, a stranger reached out and infused…

Creating a Public Spectacle

As long as our bad air holds out, the laser display planned for Patriots Square likely will be a great success. The park has been touted as a symbol of the Valley’s desire to build itself a high-tech industrial future. The flashy laser show will complete architect Ted Alexander’s bizarre…

Election Irregularities Charged

Janette Kimble, one of three ultraconservative Glendale school board members targeted by a recall effort, has been accused of interfering with voters at the Glendale nursing home where she works. Two former county elections workers say Kimble attempted to prevent them from helping elderly residents at the Glencroft Retirement Community…