Audio By Carbonatix
Advertising Can't Do It Alone
The challenges facing local news organizations are very real. That's why reader support matters more than ever. If you believe independent journalism matters, make a contribution today and help us reach our summer fundraising goal of $15,000 by August 9.
Miss Hildebrandt’s fourth-grade reading class, 9:30 a.m.
” . . . very good, Sarah. Emily Dickinson was a fine choice. All right, Jeffrey, what poem have you brought in for us today?”
“This is a new one I found called ÔFoxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo,’ by Jimmy Pop Ali.”
“Hmm, I haven’t heard of that writer. Is he from Cuba? Kenya, perhaps?”
“He’s from the Bloodhound Gang.”
“Oh. . . well, all right, go ahead, Jeffrey.”
“Vulcanize the whoopee stick/In the ham wallet/Cattle prod the oyster ditch/with the lap rocket/Batter dip the cranny ax/in the gut locker/Retrofit the pudding hatch/Ooh la la/with the boink swatter/Marinate the nether rod/in the squish mitten/Power drill the yippee bog/with the dude piston/Pressure wash the quiver bone/in the bitch wrinkle/Cannonball the fiddle cove/Ooh la la/with the pork stee — “
“Aiiiieeeeee!!!” (thud)
“Miss Hildebrandt, are you okay? Miss Hildebrandt?!”
