The walls, floors, and fixtures of Bar Smith are definitely gonna be quaking and shaking at some point later tonight. But despite what all those apocalypse nuts might lead you to believe, its not because seismic forces are tearing up the Valley is some end of the world scenario. Nope, its merely because DJ ill-legal? and the others performing at Boomsday are dropping some low-end shit on the mixers.

Like most sane folks, ill-legal (a longtime resident of UK Thursdays) doesn't believe that Armageddon will occur today. At the same time, he's prepared for the unlikely, and has already figured out what tracks he'll spin if flaming comets come from above or if zombies start roaming the earth, as well as which of his fellow DJs he'd sacrifice should an undead flesh-eater starts staggering his way.

Name: Blake Ludera

AKA: DJ ill-legal

Preferred Genres: I love different stuff all across the spectrum from classic Chicago booty house to the more current sounds coming from the trap genre, and just about everything in between. I still appreciate the artists who are putting out quality dubstep and mid-tempo/glitch, as well as the stuff I grew up listening to like Rage Against the Machine, and groups like the Beastie Boys who never really allowed themselves to be defined by just one style.

Do you believe the world will end on Friday? Not in the least, but I think the potential for people to go dumb will be at an all-time high. The idea that the world could be ending is like an open-invite for some people to do things they normally wouldn't consider, especially if there are no repercussions.

Do you expect to see such behavior at Bar Smith? I'm going to predict record-breaking levels of intoxication, but I love the security team at Bar Smith/Monarch, so I trust that they'll let it get rowdy, as long as it's within reason.

What will you be spinning? Mostly trap, mid-tempo/glitch, and hip hop, along with a few other surprises.

Do you plan to blow the bass out at Boomsday in honor of the apocalypse? Absolutely. To quote one of my favorite artists, E-40 once said, "My shit bangs."

Are you worried that the quaking bass sounds will be mistaken for an earthquake? Depends on who is playing on the PK rig next door at Monarch, those low frequencies could certainly be mistaken for seismic activity, no doubt.

Do you plan to drop any other appropriate songs during your set? Nero's "End of the World" may end up somewhere in the mix, however I can promise you that R.E.M.'s "It's the End of the World (As We Know It)" will most definitely not. That's one thing about my sets, you never know what I may pull out of my collection when the mood strikes.

Let's say shit does go down during your set. What tracks would you drop during certain apocalyptic scenarios, like say, asteroids come from the sky? "Falling Star" by Florence and the Machine/Kid Kudi (R3K Remix)

What if the dead rise from their graves? Zombie Apocalype by Vaski would be a fitting choice, or the Walking Dead theme song remix by Cryptex.

If the Large Hadron Collider starts turning the world inside out? Liquid Stranger, "Meltdown."

What's your favorite doomsday song? Word on the street is that Skrillex is collaborating with Kanye West for his next album, and -- while I haven't heard it yet -- if that isn't a distinct sign of the apocalypse, I don't know what is.

If you could decide how the world should end, what would you pick? I'm gonna have to go with zombie stripper apocalypse, sounds much more appealing than most other options. Plus I've got way more zombie-themed tunes to give an appropriate send off to that effect.

The Facebook page for Boomsday states that "we have a great tactical advantage" being on Bar Smith's rooftop. How handy are you at taking out zombies with a firearm? After all, you're listed on the flyer as a "hired gun." I've spent some time at the shooting range and I'm pretty accurate with a 9mm, plus I've had my share of fights growing up playing hockey. I'm confident that I could hold my own.

Do you think y'all could barricade the front doors of Bar Smith well enough? There's a significant amount of heavy bench seating and extra speaker cabinets hiding out in the back, that'd do the trick.

If a zombie makes it through all that, which one of your fellow DJs would you shove towards the creature while making a break for it? That's harsh. I love Bigie and I'd never willingly give him up to the zombie bastard, but I'm pretty sure I could outrun the guy.

Do you have special plans for Friday, being that it could be your final day on earth? I'll probably go play hockey in the morning, procrastinate on Facebook for a while, enjoy a delicious (possibly last) meal at Luke's of Chicago, download and sort some tunes for my set, and spend some quality time with my friends.

What would your last words be? Oh man, that's deep. Everything that comes to mind feels inappropriate for print; you'll just have to show up to find out.

Foul Play's Boomsday kicks off at 9 p.m. on Friday at Bar Smith. Admission is free until 10:30 p.m.

• DJ Dossier