Five Reasons Why Kings of Leon Really Canceled The Rest of Their Tour

News of a canceled tour is always upsetting, especially for everyone that bought tickets to the show and was really looking forward to it.

This season's bummer tour cancellation comes from Kings of Leon, a band that some people love and others love to hate.

There was plenty of speculation over the real reason for the tour cancellation after the band cut short a show in Dallas back in July.

Apparently heat exhaustion was a factor, as it was affecting Caleb's vocal chords. Rumors about Caleb's potential drinking problem were widely spread too.

I bet a ton of people in Phoenix are pissed that tonight's show isn't going down. I have my own (mostly joke) guesses as to what they're really up to instead of playing at the Ashley Furniture HomeStore Pavilion.


Having Sex with Models

Jared Followill used to date a model and Caleb married a model, so he's definitely banging one. As for Matthew and Nathan, Nathan is married to musician Jessie Baylin and Matthew became a father earlier this year. But in a perfect world, it's just easier to go on with life believing the band members are doing a plethora of models every single night.

Starting a Religion

Despite the fact that the Kings Of Leon boys had a very Christian upbringing and their father was a preacher, it seems like rock stars can pretty easily decide to live a limitless sort of lifestyle. After all, Courtney Love once said, "Being a rock star is like being a cult leader: you really have to be in your own religion." And nobody's more of a mess of a rock star than Courtney Love.

Putting Down Fans so They Can Boost Their Egos

From what I've personally been told by photographers who shot the band last summer, Kings of Leon treat their roadies and their groupies like shit, which is why I wouldn't be surprised if they're the kind of people who insult others just to boost their own self esteem. Well, that and they're rock stars, so they care an awful lot about having high self esteem.

Staring at Themselves in The Mirror

If you're a band that has its own clothing line, chances are you care way too much about your appearance. Kings of Leon seems like they could definitely be one of those bands whose members constantly ask each other how they look. Derek Zoolander said it best: "Did you ever think there's more to life than being really, really, really ridiculously good-looking?"


Let's not kid ourselves. Come on, what did you think they were actually doing besides drinking?

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Lenni Rosenblum