Fun Bobby and his wife Lisa with Tammy Faye Bakker
A little more than a year ago, I wrote here about Hollywood Alley-based promoter Fun Bobby Birmingham leaving town with his family for the greener pastures of rural Oregon where he's been working at the infamous Dante's bar/venue up there. It's been a loss for music here, not just because of the bands he was bringing, but because the Alley's just not the same without his lanky grinning face behind the bar (though I still love the Alley).
But, soon we'll have at least a fraction of the Fun Bob action back. We've stayed in touch, and Fun Bobby's ready to start bringing bands back to the 'Nix, as well as other cities like Tucson, Seattle, and Denver. The first gig is Tuesday, May 22nd at the Alley, with his signature act Melt Banana hitting town (yeah, the Japanese noise-rock combo). But Fun Bobby's got a veritable vault of rock stories from his years promoting down here. After the jump, you can read his email to me recounting his encounter with El Duce, the now-deceased infamous Mentors frontman who claimed that Courtney Love offered him $50K to off Kurt...
The band was The Mentors and me and my dearly missed drinkin' buddy, El Duce, tore it up! With bandmate Sickie Wifebeater passed out face first on my tile floor the Fun Lisa, my buddy Mickey and I smoked, drank, danced and sang till the paperboy showed up. El Duce told us in between stories about how Courtney Love offered him,"Fifty grand to knock my old man off." Later I would see him telling the filmakers responsible for the documentary "Curt and Courtney" the same fucking thing. Word for fucking word!!! Creepy! At about 4am The Dooch says to me,"Rob, since you been so nice to us I'm not going to rape yer old lady. But, I'm not going to let you go to bed either. You gotta stay up and drink with the old man!" I told my wife to go to bed and to lock the door. Me and Duce stayed up drinking a bottle of rot-gut tequila left over from some naked pool party. At about 6:30am I said to my new, special friend,"Fuck you Dooch! I'm out!" I told him that he could have anything that he wanted from the fridge and to pass out wherever the fuck.
After only a couple hours of sleep I awake to the sound of the phone constantly ringing from my wife calling me from work continually asking,"Are they gone, yet?" I step over this giant, smelly mess named El Duce in the middle of my living room. Next to him was an empty bottle and some chicken bones left over from the 6 week old KFC that he chose to eat outta my fridge.
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About noon, as the Mentor Van is pulling out of my driveway the whole tribe is ultra-thankfully cheering and singing praises to me. Sure, I'm one hospitable motherfucker but I felt that their collective thank you's was a bit excessive. So I ask,"What's all this about?" One of the band's roadies tells me,"We have to drive all the way to Dallas. It's bad enough that he makes us listen to his music the whole way but he hasn't bathed in over two weeks!" Guess I was the first person to get El Duce to shower in a while. I knew that I was onto something special with this rock thing. God I miss that fucker! Rock in peace, Dooch.
Anyhoo, that's a milestone from the time that I started signing contracts and shit. Since then there has been a bazillion good, bad and definitely ugly stories. This past year has been really quite shitty for the Fun Family. Looks like we will be out of the weeds soon. However, since I left AZ we have experienced some of the worst of the E! True Fun Bobbywood Story. I have plenty to tell you about this last year that wasn't fun at all. All that we have faced this past year will make my rise to the top of the rock pile even sweeter!
You know that I'm not some vain idiot that needs to read about myself all the time. I'm just an idiot that would like to share my story and hype up the start of a brand new chapter in my career as Fun Bobby-Independent Rock Martyr.
Cheers and Beers! FB