​I know, I know -- you're looking at that headline and thinking to yourself, "Well how is he gonna shine this turd new show announcements?" I won't lie -- I can't really. You Hang Up is finally playing a show, but all that jazz was taken care of last week. Sufjan Stevens announced he's playing Mesa today -- also taken care of. Yet I must soldier on.

Anberlin: With Crash Kings, & Civil Twilight, Saturday, Oct. 2, 6:30
p.m., $18-$20. Marquee Theatre, 730 N. Mill Ave., Tempe, 480-829-0607.

Bad Religion: With Bouncing Souls, & Off With Their Heads, Tuesday, Nov.
9, 6:30 p.m., $22.50-$25. Marquee Theatre, 730 N. Mill Ave., Tempe,
480-829-0607.

Sara Bareilles: With Greg Laswell, & Javier Dunn, Thursday, Sept. 30,
6:30 p.m., $20-$25. Marquee Theatre, 730 N. Mill Ave., Tempe,
480-829-0607.

Behemoth: With Watain, Withered, & Black Anvil, Saturday, Nov. 20, 6:30
p.m., $17-$20. Marquee Theatre, 730 N. Mill Ave., Tempe, 480-829-0607.

Joe Brooks: Saturday, Sept. 11, 5 p.m., $8-$10. Rhythm Room, 1019 E.
Indian School Rd., Phoenix, 602-265-4842.

Shemekia Copeland: Friday, Sept. 24, 8:30 p.m., $20-$22. Compound Grill,
7000 E. Mayo Blvd., Phoenix, 480-585-5483.

Deerhunter: With Casino vs. Japan, Wednesday, Nov. 3, 8 p.m., $15-$16.
Clubhouse Music Venue, 1320 E. Broadway Rd., Tempe, 480-968-3238.

Despised Icon: With Misery Index, Revocation, & more, Sunday, Sept. 26,
7 p.m., $12-$14. theUnderground, 105 W. Main St., Mesa, 480-559-5859.

Kina Grannis: Monday, Sept. 27, 8 p.m. Martini Ranch & Shaker Room, 7295
E. Stetson Dr., Scottsdale, 480-970-0500.

JJ Grey and Mofro: Wednesday, Sept. 22, 9 p.m., $22-$24. Compound Grill,
7000 E. Mayo Blvd., Phoenix, 480-585-5483.

Trevor Hall: Wednesday, Oct. 6, 9 p.m., $12-$15. Compound Grill, 7000 E.
Mayo Blvd., Phoenix, 480-585-5483.

Al Jardine's Endless Summer: Saturday, Sept. 4, 8 p.m., $45-$55. Grand
Ballroom at Talking Stick Resort, 9800 E. Indian Bend Rd., Scottsdale,
480-850-7734.

Judgment Day: Thursday, Sept. 16, 8 p.m., $8-$10. Trunk Space, 1506
Grand Ave., Phoenix, 602-256-6006.

Junip: With Sharon Van Etten, Tuesday, Nov. 16, 8 p.m., $15. Rhythm
Room, 1019 E. Indian School Rd., Phoenix, 602-265-4842.

Jesse Malin and the St. Marks Social: With Money Brother, Saturday, Oct.
2, 9 p.m., $10. Yucca Tap Room, 29 W. Southern Ave., Tempe,
480-967-4777.

Phantogram: With Josiah Wolf, & DJ Jared Alan, Friday, Oct. 8, 10 p.m.,
$10-$13. Sanctum, 4343 N. 7th Ave., Phoenix, 602-264-1700.

Jerry Seinfeld: Saturday, Oct. 9, 7 p.m., $45-$75. Dodge Theatre, 400 W.
Washington St., Phoenix, 602-379-2800.

Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin: With The Lonely Forest, Saturday,
Nov. 20, 8 p.m., $10-$12. Trunk Space, 1506 Grand Ave., Phoenix,
602-256-6006.

The Spittin' Cobras: With Scorpion vs. Tarantula, Cheap Girls, Bear
Awesome, Wire Feeder, & more, Saturday, Sept. 4, 8 p.m., $9. The Rogue
Bar, 423 N. Scottsdale Rd., Scottsdale, 480-947-3580.

Tech N9ne: With E-40, Glasses Malone, & more, Monday, Oct. 11, 6:30
p.m., $33-$35. Marquee Theatre, 730 N. Mill Ave., Tempe, 480-829-0607.

The Weepies: Tuesday, Nov. 23, 8 p.m., $15-$17. Rhythm Room, 1019 E.
Indian School Rd., Phoenix, 602-265-4842.

You Hang Up: Saturday, Sept. 4, 8 p.m., $10. Martini Ranch & Shaker
Room, 7295 E. Stetson Dr., Scottsdale, 480-970-0500.

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