Janet Jackson -- who you may remember for such accomplishments as wearing the world's worst shoulder pads, being related to the weirdest weirdo in the weirdo-filled history of popular music and letting Justin Timberlake expose her saggy and ugly pierced breast to the largest television audience assembled on any given year -- is coming to Phoenix.
Miss Jackson (because I'm nasty) brings her "Janet Jackson Number Ones, Up Close and Personal Tour" (also known as the "No One Can Sell Out Arenas Anymore, Especially If Their Last Hit Was During The Clinton Administration Tour) to Phoenix's Comerica Theatre on Friday, April 8, 2011.
Tickets are on sale this Saturday, January 15th at 10 a.m. through Livenation.
What's new about this tour, you ask?
"This tour will differ from her previous concert schedules in that she will perform music exclusively from her chart-topping CD NUMBER ONES. There will also be a focus on venues that will allow Janet to be up close and personal in a much more intimate setting. In each selected city JANET will offer something different to her performance so no show will be the same. This tour is JANET more revealed, more intimate, and more personal than ever before. Don't look for special effects. Just listen to and look at Janet, as you have never seen her before."
Translation: We're skimping on the pyro and lasers and Janet is too old to move like she used to, but she'll sing every damned hit she has, don't worry about that!
Here's Janet at her peak.