Audio By Carbonatix
Beavis & Butt-Head makes its triumphant return to MTV on Thursday, October 27 at 10/9c, and quite frankly, we can’t wait. This preview of “Holy Cornholio” looks promising, but one thing is missing–music videos! Half the fun of watching Beavis & Butt-Head was listening to the duo’s commentary on popular music. Supposedly, Beavis & Butt-Head‘s return won’t include music videos, so we came up of a list of videos from 1998 (one year after the show went off the air), to now that we think the boys should watch.
1998: Savage Garden- Truly Madly Deeply
– Did Darren Hayes wear that jacket when he entered The Matrix?
– You better run, he’s stalking you.
– “Hey, Butt-Head, you should grow sideburns like that.” “Shut up, butt munch.”
– Do girls really fall for crap like this?
– This video would be better if it had that chick from Run, Lola, Run.
1999: Goo Goo Dolls- Iris
– “Hey, Butt-Head, that guy totally humped that telescope. Boingoingoingoing.” “I bet he uses that to look at chicks.”
– Obligatory commentary on Nicolas Cage’s bad movies.
– You shouldn’t play in the middle of the street, you could like, get hit by a car or something.
– John Rzeznik’s voice is cracking. Did he finally start puberty?
– How the hell do you pronounce his last name, anyway? It’s not nearly as cool as Trent Reznor’s name.
2000: Creed- Higher
– Hasn’t that guy been arrested a bunch of times? Yeah, he made a sex tape with Kid Rock.
– If he shaved his chest, Scott Stapp would look like a girl. What a wuss.
– Hey look, it’s the groupie from the Kid Rock sex tape!
– I think he has something stuck in his throat. What do you mean that’s how he really sings?
2001: Christina Aguilera, Lil’ Kim, Mya, Pink, and Missy Elliott- Lady Marmalade
-Marry, fuck, kill: uhh wait, there’s four of them. Oh, Missy Elliot makes five.
-“Hey, Butt-Head, look where she just touched herself! She did it again!”
-That guy from Twisted Sister sings like a girl.
2002: Nelly- Hot in Here
-Why does his sweatband keep moving? Is this, like, the official Nelly workout video? -What happened to his face?
-Is this the new Friday the 13th movie?
-Any shot of a girl gets a “boingoingoingoing.”
2003: Outkast- Roses
-You know what else smells like poo poo? My butt.
-Yeah, don’t throw papers, you fart knockers! That lady is old…
-Is Andre 3000 gonna bust out with some Greased Lightning?
-This school looks way cooler than Lawndale.
2004: Kelis- Milkshake
-My bunghole brings all the boys to the yard…
-Grinding against the counter is unsanitary.
-I wonder if she serves shamrock shakes?
-All they serve is milkshakes, ass-shaped bread, and eggs? Drunk people must love going there.
2005: Gwen Stefani- Luxurious
-Isn’t she ripping off an Isley Brothers song?
-So, laying on the floor and painting your nails makes you rich.
-“We should get grills so we can hang out with Gwen Stefani,” “No, we should just tell her to get No Doubt back together.”
-Shouldn’t gold watches fall out of those piñatas?
2006: Dragonforce- Through The Fire and Flames
-Is that guy like, Dio’s son or something?
-Guys stare in awe at crazy guitar then later rock out. End of story.
2007: Rihanna ft. Jay-Z- Umbrella
-Not pictured: Jay-Z getting burned by the sparks.
-So, can I hire Rihanna to bring me an umbrella any time it rains?
-Is this an homage to that one video with the dude standing there naked?
-Sparks make water…we should really pay more attention in science class.
2008: Katy Perry- I Kissed a Girl
-The boys have nothing to say other than, “Come to Butt-Head/This is the greatest video I have ever seen.”
2009: Lady Gaga- Bad Romance
-Why is Madonna dressed like Bart Simpson?
-If she wants a bad romance so bad, why doesn’t she just watch Twilight?
-Lots of looks of combined disgust and confusion.
2010: Insane Clown Posse- Miracles
-Aren’t these guys supposed to be gigolos or something?
-So, this is what the weird kids at the mall listen to?
-Fucking rainbows, man.
-You know what else is a miracle? Drive-thrus.
2011: Kanye West- Monster
-We need to interrupt Taylor Swift so we can get groped by a bunch of chicks.
-“Oops, I gave them too many drugs.”
-Pharaohs don’t seem like they’d be very good in bed.
-Is Jay-Z just randomly listing off names of monsters? What about chupacabras?
-Hey, it’s that chick whose name is a play off the Spanish word for threesome.
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