10 Craziest Phoenix Crimes of the Month: June | Valley Fever | Phoenix | Phoenix New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Phoenix, Arizona

10 Craziest Phoenix Crimes of the Month: June

No matter how many police reports we read through on a monthly basis, the criminal creativity, stupidity, and craziness never ceases to amaze us.Just when you think you've seen it all, there's always something worse. From a mom shooting up her toddler with meth, to another woman trying to hide...
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No matter how many police reports we read through on a monthly basis, the criminal creativity, stupidity, and craziness never ceases to amaze us.

Just when you think you've seen it all, there's always something worse. From a mom shooting up her toddler with meth, to another woman trying to hide a pound of meth in her vagina, to a man cutting off a guy's head and limbs with a power saw, and more, we bring you the 10 craziest Phoenix crimes this month:

10.) Bobby Ruiz Allegedly Bites Off Ear of MCSO Detention Officer

An inmate at one of Sheriff Joe Arpaio's jails attacked a detention officer, biting part of her ear "completely off." The officer, who's only worked there a year, was doing a cell-search at the Lower Buckeye Jail when 21-year-old Bobby Ruiz jumped on her back and started attacking her. The piece of ear wasn't found, leading to the belief that Ruiz may have swallowed the chunk of her ear.

9.) Andrew Teaters, Gilbert Teacher, Had Sex with 17-Year-Old Student in Classroom, Cops Say

Andrew "A.J." Teaters, a 29-year-old charter school teacher in Gilbert, had sex with a student -- in his classroom, according to police. The 17-year-old girl told police they started flirting at the school, then flirted on Twitter, and that all escalated to their having sex in his classroom. Teaters was arrested at his home in Mesa (where he lives with his wife and kids).

8.) Ian McIntosh, of Buckeye, Robbed a Mentally Handicapped Man, Police Say

Ian McIntosh, a 27-year-old Buckeye resident, shoved a mentally handicapped man off his bicycle and stole his iPad, according to police. McIntosh also threw a beer can at the man before shoving him, breaking his glasses and trying to punch the man while he was lying on the ground, according to court documents

7.) Nikki Hockett Sleeps While 2-Year-Old Daughter Goes for a Stroll Around Neighborhood at 4 a.m.

A man leaving for work around 4:30 a.m. one day found a 2-year-old in his driveway, and the child's mother, 22-year-old Nikki Hockett, showed up to get her kid -- 2 1/2 hours later. Hockett, who was sleeping at her boyfriend's house, said her kid has a knack for unlocking doors. The youngster was fine, but had made it a couple blocks without shoes in her early-morning walk.

6.) Bumbling Buddies Give Meth to Stripper; Stripper Did Not Want Meth

Like mother always said, nothing good ever comes of handing a bag of meth to a stripper at 2 a.m. on a Thursday. Friends Vernon Henry and Michael Clawson did not heed this advice while at Cheetahs Gentleman's Club in Phoenix, according to court documents. Henry and Clawson -- who had made it almost six whole weeks without getting arrested together for allegedly having drugs -- were out on the patio with one of the "dancers," when Henry just handed over a bag of meth, the strip club manager told police. Police were then called.

5.) Jonathan Mattox Claims to Be "Baddest Motherf***er Alive," Says He'll Rape Cops' Families

Jonathan Mattox to drive away from the Talking Stick Restort casino plastered, police say. After refusing to get a cab, at casino security's insistence, police were called, and Mattox was not exactly friendly. He wouldn't stop trying to kick things, even after police had him cuffed and in a squad car, and he claimed he'd find out where the officers lived, kill them, and rape their family members. Mattox added that he was the "baddest motherfucker alive" and added that he "did time for manslaughter," (the second part is true).

4.) Meth-Head Mom Allegedly Shot Up 5-Year-Old Kid With Meth

An admitted meth user's 5-year-old daughter tested positive for meth, after the girl complained about her mother sticking her with needles. Jacqueline Trousdale, a 30-year-old Phoenix resident, was the subject of "several" ongoing Child Protective Services investigations, according to court documents. Police were actually investigating molestation allegations, in addition to the girl's claim that he mom "stuck her in the foot with a needle, and she felt drowsy afterwards." The girl's urine tested positive for meth.

3.) Jose Rodriguez-Caro Throws Shards of Glass at People While Jogging Naked Around Neighborhood

A Phoenix man who went for a jog completely naked also tossed shards of glass at people. The nude jog for Jose Antonio Rodriguez-Caro came to an end after he tossed a river rock "wider than his head" at a police car, which led to him being tased twice. After he was placed in a police car, he complained about being thirsty, so the officers gave him a bottle of water, which he spit out all over the two cops in the car. No fewer than six people (not including cops) were forced to see his penis during his episode, including two kids, police said.

2.) Border Agents Find a Pound of Meth in Claudia Ibarra's Vagina

This one's actually at the border, but it's too crazy to leave out -- a woman tried to smuggle a pound of meth hidden in her vagina into the United States. A federal complaint says agents noticed part of a broken condom hanging out of 31-year-old Claudia Ibarra's pants as they patted her down at the port of entry in San Luis.y. Ibarra had to be taken to a hospital in Yuma because the package "could not be removed from her body," and the package of meth, weighing exactly one pound, was successfully removed by a doctor.

1.) Mario Chagolla Jr. Allegedly Cuts Off Guy's Head with Power Saw, Says It's "Not My First Rodeo"

Investigators believe 35-year-old Mario Chagolla Jr., a non-tribal member who lives in Camp Verde, stabbed a Native American man to death before cutting off his head and limbs with a circular saw, pulling the teeth out of his head, and tossing most of the parts in a fire, according to a federal complaint. Chagolla then held the man's head in the air and said something to the effect of, "This is what you get for messing with somebody else's girl," a witness told investigators. Chagolla told the same witness not to say anything or he'd kill them and told him, "This is not my first rodeo."

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Follow Matthew Hendley on Twitter at @MatthewHendley.

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