It's official. Arizona has its head up its backside, and it now has the trophy to prove it. Last night on HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, Maher announced the winner of a four-week long competition to decide which of the 50 was America's stupidest state. And -- like there was ever a real doubt of the outcome -- Sand Land emerged victorious.
"There were a lot of strong contenders this year," snarked Maher on his show. "We thought Alabama might be the Cinderella victory. But it is Arizona. Arizona has won."
Maher then lifted the golden, Oscar-like statuette, with its one crucial distinction.
"Here's the trophy," he chuckled. "It's a man with his head up his ass."
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The comedian promised he would send the award to Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, where she'll no doubt proudly display it on her desk next to family pics, especially the one of her "war hero" pop.
Arizona, part of the illustrious "Bone Head Conference," beat out such fellow BHC members as Kansas, Utah and Alabama to go head to head with the winner of the "Brain Dead Conference," which was Texas. Texas had devoured Mississippi, Florida and Alaska to score the BDC title.
Cactus Country no doubt took the brass wing because we dominate in hillbilly-style backwardness. Our "first string" of stupidities include an obsessive hatred of Hispanics, white supremacy, Sheriff Joe, Russell Pearce, SB 1070, the ethnic studies ban, the aborted birther bill, and, the clincher, highways with no rest stops.
Yes, we are the champions! Crank up the Queen, bros. And thank you, Bill!