Larry Flynt and Tera Patrick at Hustler Hollywood 7/7/07

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Yours truly with rocker Evan Seinfeld and the hella-hot Tera Patrick...

Porn mogul and First Amendment defender Larry Flynt has long been my personal hero. Technically, he's also my old boss, as I used to write for Hustler back in the day, though I've only talked to him while interviewing him for other mags. Flynt was at Tempe's Hustler Hollywood Store Saturday with my fave porn queen Tera Patrick to promote her new DVD with Hustler titled inTERActive. So you know I had to be there.

A crowd of 200-plus showed, standing in line for autographs and photos with the triple-X luminaries. Tera was accompanied by heavily-tatted husband/rocker Evan Seinfeld. As for Flynt's camp, other members of the Hustler clan were in attendance, including his brother Jimmy Flynt, wife Liz Berrios, and nephew Dustin Flynt, who I swear is the spitting image of Woody Harrelson in Milos Forman's The People vs. Larry Flynt. Also at the signing, waiting for a pic like everyone else was the PHX's best known dominatrix Mistress Seven, encased in Saran Wrap. When I asked Mistress Seven if I could take a pic of them after she was through getting her own pic, she naughtily replied, "I don't mind getting between these two again."

Below is the interview I did with Flynt prior to the signing, and with Evan and Tera after the signing. I borrow from the Luke Ford school of journalism here, as I don't have time to write this up as a feature. There may be spelling or grammatical errors too, I'll clean them up as I can. Thanks to my artist pals Effie Bouras and Thomas Kuntz, who were kind enough to assist with the photographs.

Larry with nephew Dustin, who looks just like Woody Harrelson in The People vs. Larry Flynt...

Conversation with Larry Flynt...

Feathered Bastard: Last month you took out a full page ad in the Washington Post offering a $1 million reward to anyone who comes forward with evidence that they’ve engaged in illicit sex with a member of Congress or some other high-ranking government official. What kind of reaction have you received?

Larry Flynt: We’ve gotten about 250 responses, but you’ve got to understand a lot of them don’t go anywhere. There are a lot of crazies, you know, who never sign their letters or offer any evidence. You’ve got to go through and weed all those out. We’ve got about 10 leads that are really good. We’re definitely going to be releasing something in early fall.

FB: I’ve heard that a couple of the leads deal with closeted gay Republicans who’ve voted for anti-gay legislation.

Flynt: That’s true. I don’t know why everybody thinks I’m out to get Republicans. That’s not true. It’s just that they’re just so much more fun. Because they live a repressed life all their lives. And they stay in the closet. So when they make a mistake, things can get interesting. But if I can get a Democrat, I’ll nail them to the wall just like I would a Republican. If someone has a public position contrary to the way they live their private life, then they’re a hypocrite. And I see hypocrisy as a serious threat to Democracy. It’s not that I want to expose somebody’s sex life. I’m for privacy in that area, and I’ve always advocated it. A lot of people attack me by saying all you want is to expose their sex lives. That’s not true. We want to try to get hypocrisy out of Congress.

FB: I sort of remember that you were a Republican once. Didn’t you run against Ronald Reagan in the Republican Presidential primary?

Flynt: (smiling) That was a joke. That wasn’t a serious campaign. In ’84 he was running unopposed (in the primary). I said I want to run against Reagan because I’m wealthy, I’m white and I’ve been shot for what I believe in.

FB: I know you and your old nemesis the Rev. Jerry Falwell had mended fences somewhat before he passed. Did you attend his funeral? Were you saddened by his death?

Flynt: No (I didn’t go to his funeral). My mother always told me that no matter how much you despise somebody, when you meet them you’ll always find something about them you like. Now, Falwell fought me 15 years in court, ending up in the Supreme Court. And I hated him. But after I got to know him, it wasn’t that he wasn’t sincere. He was sincere. He was just misguided.

Conversation with Tera Patrick and Evan Seinfeld...

Evan and Tera with the PHX's own Mistress Seven...

FB: You’ve had a lot of success crossing over into the mainstream from porn, something only a handful in porn have been able to do. What’s your secret?

Tera Patrick: Well if I divulged my secret, I’d probably have to kill you. I don’t know. I mean I think people really like me. I’m very friendly, and I’m very personable, and I think my looks have something to do with it too. But my husband Evan Seinfeld has been real integral in my career. You know my husband came from mainstream, and he crossed over into adult. So he’s really helped me. And together we’ve worked with each other. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to go as far as I did go.

FB: Have you guys ever thought of doing a reality show of your own?

Evan: We have our own reality show, it’s called Rockstar/Pornstar. We met with every single major network and they’re all scared because we’re too cool.

Tera: It’ll be airing on ClubTera.com, our website.

Evan: And you’ll be able to find it at Rockstarpornstar.com.

Tera: And we’re brokering a deal with InDemand.

Evan: Everywhere you’re able to see porn on the Internet, you’ll be able to get it.

FB: Are you two exclusive with each other, as far as working in porn?

Evan: No, we’re still (working) with other people

Tera: He’s so quick to say that.

Evan: I was talking about you.

Tera: I don’t really perform any more.

Evan: Yes you do.

Tera: I do? (Pause.) He’s the only performer in the family.

Evan: I work a lot more. Tera’s movies are blockbusters. They’re big movies. She only puts out a couple of movies a year. We put out 3, 4 Tera movies a year. We have a lot of it shot, so she’s not actively shooting. Me I’m launching my web site Spyderzwebxxx.com. Spyderzweb is all the music from my band the Spyderz.

Tera:And we just got off a tour in Europe with Ozzy Ozbourne.

Evan: It was Ozzy Ozbourne, Velvet Revolver…

Tera: Korn, Iron Maiden…

Evan: Black Sabbath…

Tera: Heaven and Hell…

Evan: Megadeath...

Tera: It’s funny because when we met in 2003, he fully threw himself into doing my career, and managing me and starting Teravision. So the music kind of went on the back burner. So now he has a new outlet with porn, he can put all his music into my movies, his movies.

FB: Are you guys always together?

Tera: Oh, yeah.

Evan: We miss a day here and there. We try to book ourselves together. Like when the Spyderz put our album out and go on tour. She’ll be booked in every city that I’m booked in. We don’t like to split up too much.

Tera: Actually the last tour was kinda nice. I didn’t have to work, he was doing all the work. So I was hanging out in the coffee shop.

Evan: (with a wink in his voice) Yeah, in Amsterdam in the coffee shop. She’s backstage with Velvet Revolver hanging out.

FB: Are you guys ever jealous of each other?

Tera: Yeah, I’m jealous because I really want to be the rock star. And he really wants to be the porn star.

Evan: We never fight over fan attention.

Tera: It’s funny cause now --

Evan: We have a lot of the same fans.

Tera: Yeah, yeah.

Evan: This is Tera’s appearance, but every third person wants a picture with me or my autograph. And every third one of my fans wants a picture with Tera. We market ourselves as a couple and we’re a new kind of couple. We’re not Nick and Jessica. We’re certainly not Donnie and Marie. You know what I mean?

Tera: They’re brother and sister.

Evan: So we’re definitely not them.

Evan: (in a whisper to Tera) There’s this weird black dude over there. He told everybody that he works for us, but I’ve never seen him in my life.

Tera: I’ve never seen him in my life either.

FB: Weren’t you two just here last week for an appearance at the Castle Megastore?

Evan: We haven’t been here all week. In between last week and this week were in Seattle, Los Angeles, Chicago,

FB: Is all that traveling very tiring?

Tera: I do get a lot of rest, but at the same time, I have to do it now. The time is now, because when I do retire, I hope I can stay in one place long and have a garden you know and slow down. I don’t want to slow down right now. I like traveling. I like meeting new people. I like going to new places. I’m going to Japan at the end of the month. He’ll be performing and I’ll be signing autographs.

Evan: We try to double things up. Like Tera’s going to host the Exotic Erotic Ball in San Francisco for Halloween and the Spyderz are going to be the special music guests at it.

Tera: We’re going for world domination. That’s the secret. World domination.

FB: Earlier, you said you don’t perform any more. What did you mean by that?

Tera: We have a lot of stuff stockpiled. It’s not that I don’t want to perform anymore. It’s just that I travel so much. I don’t get to shoot as much as I want to shoot anymore. So last year and the year before we stockpiled like 30 movies. And we’re going to release them. The movies aren’t going to stop. I’m mostly traveling now and doing appearances. We are shooting next month. We’re going to do a movie called Luxury Model. I think I’m going to direct that one.

Evan: It’s going to be Tera’s directorial debut. Fashion, vignette, really expensive...

Tera: Kind of like Andrew Blake style. That’s my favorite stuff to do. I don’t like to act.

Evan: I like to help her achieve all of her dreams. She wants to make a beautiful movie. We’ll finance it. We’ll have the castings…

FB: Tell me about your fashion line, Mistress Couture?

Tera: I designed everything myself, and I’m having everything manufactured in China. My partner is a company called Lucky 13. They’ll be distributing the clothes. They do like rockabilly/rocker-style clothes.

Evan: The style of Mistress Couture, it kind of fits our whole lifestyle, rock star/porn star, pinup, hotrod, choppers, glamour girls, models, strippers. Whatever you want to do. Like, be your own freak. Don’t conform to what everybody else is doing.

FB: I read this thing on the Internet, that you speak fluent Hungarian. Is that true?

Tera: No I don’t. I don’t know where that comes from.

Evan: That comes up like once a week. Either that or someone will come over and start speaking (gibberish approximating Hungarian)

Tera: And I’m like, “What?” I don’t speak any Thai either, and I’m half Thai.

FB: Have you ever been to Thailand?

Tera: We’re going this summer. We’re going to meet my relatives, so that’ll be cool. We’re going to take them some pictures…

Evan: We think Tera might be the biggest Thai star.

Tera: Yeah, I might be the most famous Thai person in the world.

Evan: Tiger woods is part Thai…

Tera: Oh, I’m more famous than Tiger Woods. (laughing)

Evan: I think you have more Internet traffic than Tiger Woods.

Tera: Easily.

FB: Tera, are you still an RN?

Tera: No your license expires after four years. I take care of him, and put on my nurse’s uniform…

(Evan whips out his iPod, shows me some photos of him in a hospital bed with Tera bending over him in a sexy nurse’s uniform.)

Evan: That’s me in my hospital bed, with my hot wife.

FB: (to Tera) I loved you in that Aqua Teen Hunger Force episode last year. Can we look forward to seeing you in anything like that in the future?

Evan: She just got offered to be in the DragonBall Z movie. But if she’s shooting in Japan for four months, she’s not gonna do it.

Tera: (in a little girl voice) Yeah, I wanna do it…

Evan: They always want too much of our time.

Tera: I would go to Japan for four months.

Evan: That’s the thing, Okinawa.

Tera: That’s OK, I love Okinawa. They live the longest in the world. To 100, on average, the Okinawans.

FB: So how did you two meet?

Tera: We met in 2002. I saw him on the show OZ, that he was on. I called HBO and told them I was interested in meeting him, and that I wanted to meet him and that’s how we got connected. We met in September 2002, We got engaged in October, we got married in January at AVN. It’s been five years.

FB: Sorry to be tacky, but I was just admiring your ring.

Tera: (proudly showing it off): Oh, that’s OK.

FB: How many carats, if you don’t mind me asking?

Evan: It’s 3.8. Actually with the baguettes, it’s 5. That’s the house that porno built.


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