Maricopa County Mugshots of the Week: Awards Ceremony

Just about every week, we bring you a roundup of visitors to the desert’s own Fourth Avenue Jail. To be considered for our Maricopa County mugshots of the week, get arrested, strike a pose, and we’ll take care of the rest.

This week, our alleged criminals look like they deserve awards — and probably not community-service awards. We can only work with what we’ve got, so welcome to the first annual Maricopa County mugshots awards ceremony. Enjoy.

Charge: Marijuana violation

Third place, 2008 Cousin Eddie impression contest

Charges: Forgery, identity theft

Second place, longest fake eyelashes contest
First place, angriest-looking drawn-in eyebrows contest

Charge: Receiving the earnings of a child prostitute

First place, most valuable head at a Cash4Gold store

Charges: Criminal trespassing, burglary, possession of burglary tools

Eighth place, Bob Ross look-alike contest

Charges: Possession of a weapon by a prohibited person, narcotic-drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia

Third place, person most likely to have the nickname “Snake”

Charges: Possession of a weapon by a prohibited person, escape

Second place, person currently in jail who’s most likely to have been arrested while staying up late to steal cookies from the cookie jar

Charges: Narcotic-drug possession, marijunana possession, possession of drug paraphernalia

First place, angriest look given in a purple turtleneck

Charges: Burglary, marijuana possession

Participation ribbon, Ron Weasley look-alike contest

Charges: Criminal damage, disorderly conduct

Let’s preface this award by saying we call out anyone who wears a pro-sports jersey that’s 10 years out of style, and we can tell who the player is with just two letters or a partial number.

Third place, best non-ironic wearing of an Allen Iverson jersey.