Just about every week, we bring you a roundup of visitors to the desert's own Fourth Avenue Jail. To be considered for our Maricopa County mugshots of the week, get arrested, strike a pose, and we'll take care of the rest.
This week, several of our alleged criminals look like real characters. Like, the guy who wakes up in the morning, looks in the mirror, and says to himself, "Damn, Matt LeBlanc, you're looking sexy today." Enjoy.
Charges: Marijuana possession, possession of drug paraphernalia
Kids, this is what Santa's elves do the other 11 months of the year.
Charges: Endangerment, assault, criminal damage
Let's see -- there's a hockey sweater, a beard, rosy cheeks, and a really polite look after being arrested. How much more Canadian can you get?
Charges: Kidnapping, armed robbery, burglary, theft, unlawful flight from law enforcement, marijuana possession
We're definitely not saying that's a penis tattooed to the back of this fellow's head. On that note, we're definitely not saying that isn't a penis tattooed to the back of this fellow's head.
Charges: Trafficking in stolen property, burglary
No further comment.
Impersonating the Jonas Brothers apparently isn't a crime, but, man, there ought to be a law.
Charge: Transportation theft
Here's the thing, man. No one can tell what your neck tat says unless they walk almost all the way around you, and frankly, no one wants to be around you that long. However, it does appear to say "white boy," to which we say, "No shit."
Here's a list of things that need to be shaved off immediately:
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Charges: Consuming liquor in public, minor in possession of liquor
How to Disappoint Your Parents, for Dummies, 1st edition.
Charges: Criminal damage, assault
You know that guy who runs hit mouth non-stop, and you think to yourself, "Does that guy ever shut the hell up?" Here is your answer, and that answer is "no."