Maricopa County Craziness

Okay, It's Not the Oscars, But We Promise Not to Read Wrong Names of Our Best News Video Performances of 2017 (So Far)

Best Performance by an Aging Actor Trying to Get Out of Jury Duty:
Action star Steven Seagal was rarely as convincing in his movies as he was in a Maricopa County courtroom.  He couldn't call on his pal Vladimir Putin for help in this case. Seagal pleaded economic hardship for all the people who would lose jobs if his movie came to a halt while he was sitting on a jury.

Best Performance by a Man Who Doesn't Want to Get Hit by Your Car: Mesa resident Clayton Jacobs explains why you should be careful when trying to drive around blind people like him when they're crossing the street.

Best Performance by a Male Driver Who Doesn't Retaliate After Being Slapped During Road Rage Incident: This altercation in Tempe, captured by reporter Ray Stern, could have turned violent if the driver of the yellow car hadn't turned the other cheek.

Best Performance by Mother Nature: Downtown Phoenix workers got quite a surprise last week when they were served a rare hailstorm during their lunch break.

Best Performance by Donald Trump Supporters (Who Knew They Shopped at Nordstrom?): These women weren't shy about letting the fashion retailer know what they thought of its decision to drop Ivanka Trump's clothing line.
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Stuart Warner is editor of New Times. He has been a journalist since the stoned ages of 1969, playing a major role on teams that won three Pulitzer Prizes. He is also the author of the biography JOCK: A Coach's Story.
Contact: Stuart Warner