The "Mother" of all catfights: Mothers Against Drunk Driving vs. Mothers Against Illegal Aliens.

MAIA's Michelle Dallacroce, the closest thing the nativists have to Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich.

Being that I'm both pro-inebriation and what the anti-illegals crowd likes to call a champion of "open borders," I normally might feel conflicted over a catfight between MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Drivers) and MAIA (Mothers Against Illegal Aliens). But when I learned of this kerfuffle MADD's tryin' to kick up over MAIA's name, well, I opted to side with the hottest chick in the room, which in this case happens to be MAIA founder and Valley resident Michelle Dallacroce.

See, Dallacroce, about the only MILF in the nativist hornets nest, just got a cease and desist letter from MADD telling her she must lay off using the "Mothers Against" part of her org.'s name, or face a legal firing squad. Check out this hooey from MADD's attorney Anisha Taherzadeh -- and just try saying her name three times fast:

It has come to our attention that you are currently utilizing the term "Mothers Against Illegal Aliens" as the name of your company, as well as, in your domain name, www.mothersagainstillegalaliens.org . While we do not oppose the name of your organization as a whole, we cannot permit the term "Mothers Against" to be used in such a manner since it creates a likelihood of confusion to the public as to any affiliation with Mothers Against Drunk Driving. MADD cannot be associated with your organization and the use of "Mothers Against" gives a strong implication of a relationship with MADD.

We ask that you immediately cease using the term "Mothers Against" in the name of your organization, on your website, and in any other manner. We request that you discontinue the use of "Mothers Against" within the next ten (10) days. Otherwise, we will assume that no response is forthcoming and will have to consider pursuing all possible actions to enforce our rights. We thank you in advance for your cooperation in this matter.

Have you ever Googled "Mothers Against"? There's a Mothers Against Methamphetamine, a Mothers Against Sexual Abuse, Mothers Against Circumcision (no sharp kitchen implements allowed), Mothers Against Guns, Mothers Against School Hazing (for all you wimps out there), Mothers Against Munchausen's Syndrome by Proxy, Mothers Against Gang Wars, Mothers Against Violence, Mothers Against Teen Violence, Mothers Against the Draft, Mothers Against Arpaio (our fave, BTW), Mothers Against Blogging, Mothers Against Dog Chaining, Mothers Against Senseless Killings, Mothers Against Brain Injury (is anyone out there for brain injury?), Mothers Against Genetic Engineering, Mothers Against Pornography Addiction (keep 'em away from me!), and on and on. There's even a Mothers Against Peeing Standing Up, made up of "moms... and other concerned individuals who want to stop peeing standing up, support the victims (those who have to clean up), and prevent unnecessary urine stream fragmentation."

Actually, it looks like MAPSU's just trying to sell merchandise, but then again, who isn't? (I'm coming out next week with a whole line of Feathered Bastard longjohns, so stay tuned.) Wonder if MAPSU got a letter from MADD as well? Or maybe MADD's pro-peeing standing up, as long as you're not peeing standing up because you've had too much to drink.

Dallacroce tells me she's hired a legal beagle who's informed her that MADD doesn't stand a chance, and she believes that the letter has something to do with the fact that MADD has, in her opinion, aligned itself with pro-illegals, and worse!

"They have morphed into a National and International Organization which now, unbelievably, supports La Raza and LULAC members who have served and still serve on their Board of Directors and who are also members of the Trilateral Commission and Council on Foreign Relations," writes Dallacroce of MADD on her Web site. Hey, Michelle, you forgot to mention the Bilderbergers.

Anyhoo, I put in a call to MADD's various PR people. MADD spokesperson Misty Moyse got back to me, and indicated that MADD was simply defending its trademark. Asked if they'd sued anybody recently over the issue, Moyse said she didn't know, but she promised to get back to me Monday with a definitive answer. Let me take wild-ass guess here: If there are all these "Mothers Against" orgs out there, maybe MADD hasn't been that litigious. Moyse also mentioned that MADD picks and chooses its battles strategically, but she wasn't very clear on what was strategic about going after Dallacroce.

Can't see this going very far, but if it does, I'll be on it like chocolate on a Snickers bar. If Dallacroce does have to change her name, she could always see if "MILFs Against Illegal Aliens" is taken.

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