^
Keep New Times Free
4
| Lists |

Top 10 Times John McCain Was Mocked on Late-Night TV

It's hard to say why U.S. Senator John McCain is so frequently the butt of late night TV jokes.

Maybe it's his relentless willingness to say or do anything for votes?

Maybe it's his "maverick" unpredictability and love of the spotlight?

Or maybe it’s just that he’s such a good target.

Whatever the reason, here are our 10 favorite late-night TV jokes about Arizona's senior senator:

10. Apparently only John McCain finds John McCain funny.
"You know, and I've said — I thought it was a pretty good line — Russia's a gas station masquerading as a country."

9. According to Stephen Colbert, when a person doesn't accept an invitation, you have no choice but to spread lies about him — which's why he must spread lies about John McCain.
(Watch the full clip here.)

"McCain’s campaign is picking up steam. But of course, the media’s attacked him just because that steam is rising from a giant pile of fresh bullshit."


8. The time John McCain said undocumented immigrants started the Yarnell Fire, and then — gasp! — flip-flopped on the statement.
(Watch the full clip here.)

"I never said immigrants started the fire, I just said immigrants start fires….You have to understand something, Mexicans start fires. They’re fire starters. I saw one eat a plate of Habaneros and fart blue flames — took off like the space shuttle." 

7. John McCain blows off David Letterman to "go save the country." (Spoiler alert: Letterman's pissed.)
"This is not the way a tested hero behaves. Someone is putting something in his Metamucil."

6. John McCain drops into the studio to record some campaign ads.
"I'm John McCain, and I approve this message."

5.Hey, don’t judge John McCain for being white.
"I get it, the temptation is to look at McCain and vote against him because you don’t see an individual, you just see another typical ‘Welfare Whitey.’ And it’s true, he’s spent his entire life shuffling from one low-paying government job to another — well, except those years he spent in prison. Typical…"

4. Remember, Arizona is home to outspoken "immigration moderate" Senator John McCain — "Oh wait, that was pre-insane McCain..."
(Watch the full clip here)

"So I guess before, when [McCain] said ‘path to citizenship,’ he meant ‘path back to Mexican citizenship.’"

3. John McCain tries to mock Stephen Colbert for using drugs — "tries" being the operative word.
(Watch the full clip here.)

“It’s kind of addictive, like some of the substances you used to use," McCain says.
“We agreed backstage we wouldn’t talk about my crack habit," Colbert shoots back.

I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Phoenix and help keep the future of New Times free.

2. "His advocacy of the Iraq War was legend. His sophisticated knowledge of the region: unparalleled…
In that it did not parallel with anybody who had knowledge of the region."

1. Even the British can't help themselves when it comes to mocking John McCain.
"John McCain is just too old. Do you really want a president who could be killed by a mild winter?"

Keep Phoenix New Times Free... Since we started Phoenix New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Phoenix with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

 

Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.

 

Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.