Like every douchebag in college who suddenly became your friend after they found out you scored a bunch of weed, Burger King has offered Colin Firth a chance to design his own burger if he wins an Academy Award for Best Actor for his role in The King's Speech on Sunday.
Wow, really? His own burger? Does it get much better than that for an established actor with four Academy Award nominations, five BAFTA nominations, a BAFTA Award for Best Actor, a Golden Globe Award for Best Actor, and the 2010 Screen Actors Guild Award for Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Leading Role? Answer: No. Not unless he's asked to design his own Shake Weight.
A spokesman for Burger King said, "If Colin brings the coveted Oscar statuette back to Britain, we will invite him to join our chefs and create a unique celebratory burger bearing his name."
What?! An Academy Award-winning actor gets to schedule time in his not-super-busy schedule to come to your place, meet with your "chefs," and put his name put on one of your burgers? Such unselfish generosity! Maybe you could invite him to do a commercial for you as well -- strictly for Colin's career, of course.
The best part? Colin Firth would rather have a burger someplace else.
Saying he would much rather celebrate an Oscar win by visiting an American fast food chain with former Academy Award winner Dame Helen Mirren, Firth said, "I hope we can go to In-N-Out Burger. I hear that's a favourite of Helen's. She went there after the Oscars."
Whoops. Sorry, Burger King, looks like Colin's smokin' with the competition. Maybe you can hit up Geoffrey Rush, who's up for Best Supporting Actor in the same film.