If you've always wanted to taste a liquor that's been through more than a few medical tests, look no further than G-Spirits.
The German liquor company was born from the brain trust of a few classy bartenders who recognized that "it's not just the taste which makes you enjoy a drink fully" -- and that it helps to have a few busty spokeswomen.
"For us there is nothing more than the erotism of a beautiful woman," write the company's founders on the G-Spirits website. "To create the perfect taste we let every single drop of our spirits run over the breasts of a special type of woman, a type we recognize in this liquor."
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Yes. Really.
The company has a cast of three models featured on its (very NSFW) website that are rotated, cleaned (of course), and covered in vodka, whisky, or rum, before the booze experts collect the off-run and bottle the results.
Each bottle of G-Spirits come with a certificate signed by the model whose skin cells are "adding to the flavor" (a human-esque Goldschlagger, if you will) and delivered in stylish packaging.
G-Spirit representatives insist that every drop of every bottle -- sold at $150 to $180 a pop -- has been poured over one of their three models (Alexa, Evelin, and Amina) and then thoroughly tested by "medical personnel."
Yum.