Restaurant News

Lazy Cakes Relaxation Brownies: Who Exactly Are These For?

Poor Larry Lazy Cakes. The lackadaisical cartoon character (who looks a lot like South Park's Towelie) and representative of Lazy Cakes, the "relaxation brownies" laced with melatonin and sold in food markets, may have helped to sell millions of the sleepy sweet treat but now two towns in Massachusetts are trying to ban Larry and his Lazy Cakes due the excess amount of melatonin making some kids sick.

A single, Lazy Cake costs $3 to $5 dollars and contains 8 milligrams of melatonin, a dietary supplement. The usual, over the counter dose is 3 milligrams. Melatonin is not a drug and therefore not regulated by the FDA.

So kids are eating them and getting sick. Why? And why the hell would adults want a Lazy Cake over a brownie of the more, um, interesting kind?

Here's a few thoughts:

Lazy Cakes says says it clearly labels each brownie to show it advises consumption by adults only. Yeah, that usually works. But kids aren't eating Lazy Cakes to relax. What do they need relaxation from anyway -- too many hours of playing video games and hanging out with friends? No, kids are eating Lazy Cakes most likely because they are being marketed as a stoner treat.

Note to kids: stoner treats are lame. If you want something that will really put you to sleep, ask your folks how they met or go to work with your Dad.

And for us adults out there, why buy a snack filled with melatonin for the purpose of chilling out? I'm not saying go forth and whip yourself up a batch of pot brownies. But you could. And they'd be better. And you know it, too.

Here's the real answer: want some help falling asleep? The answer isn't a nasty brownie. How about just taking a sleeping pill or better yet, actual melatonin? Sheesh.

Sure there are some folks who want to ban Lazy Cakes, but once people figure out who they're for (nobody), they might not be around much longer anyway.

Sorry, Larry.

Follow Chow Bella on Facebook and Twitter.

KEEP PHOENIX NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started Phoenix New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Laura Hahnefeld
Contact: Laura Hahnefeld