May, as National Burger Month, is officially sucking ass.
No new burgers, high beef prices, a dehydrated disaster from Burger King called Fire-Grilled Ribs, and a boneless chicken brouhaha is making this holiday as senseless as the movement to retire Ronald McDonald.
The boneless chicken bedlam, made infamous by KFC's gut-busting Double Down and the recent news of its extended run, continues with the Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich, relaunched by Whataburger two weeks ago.
Is it as disgusting as the Double Down? No -- but nutritionally, it's worse. Way worse.
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SHOW ME HOW
Initially introduced in February 2005, Whataburger's Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich, features three chicken breast tenderloins, honey BBQ sauce, and two slices of Monterey Jack cheese with Whatabiters getting their choice of a bun or Texas Toast to hold their favorite fowl sandwich, available through June 21.
Despite the chicken tenders being a bit dry and wanting a tad more honey BBQ sauce in the mix, I enjoyed the first few bites until I realized that devouring this boneless chicken monster took nothing less than sheer determination and gallons of soda. Sure, Whataburger's Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich is no where near the slimy mess of KFC's Double Down (and thanks to my wrapper of Texas Toast, visually more appealing), but when I looked at the nutritional numbers, I realized that pang in my stomach wasn't just my gut saying, "What the hell, Dude?" it was the breadbasket bell of bad-for-you fare tolling loud and clear, and I was going to pay dearly.
The original version of KFC's Double Down sports 540 calories, 32 grams of fat, and 1,380 milligrams of salt. The Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich on Texas Toast from Whataburger? Try 940 calories, 48 grams of fat, and a whopping 2,231 milligrams of salt. (The American Heart Association says folks should try to eat less than 1,500 milligrams of sodium a day -- whoops.)
Guilty pleasures can be a good thing. Guilty pleasures consuming 91 percent of your daily allowance of fat and 115% percent of your daily allowance of salt are best left in fast food forgotten land.