20 best rejected Arizona license plates of all time

What kind of jokes can you make with just seven characters? Some pretty gnarly ones, it turns out.

Personalized license plates are all over Arizona, but despite their abundance, some are never pressed into metal and affixed to the back of a car. The Arizona Department of Transportation rejects personalized plates that are explicitly or suggestively vulgar, that are drug- or sex-related, or that appear to endorse such no-nos as reckless driving and, uh, murder. Apparently, the only thing the ADOT wants to kill is joy.

But that doesn’t mean we can’t see them at all. ADOT keeps a master list of rejected plate numbers, which Phoenix New Times obtained via a public records request. The department changed its plate approval system in 2020, filtering out prohibited plate numbers on the front end rather than on the back end, so the list hasn’t been updated since then. Still, it has more than 35,000 entries, which we combed through to bring you the funniest of the bunch.

Consider this the Hall of Fame (or Shame) of rejected Arizona license plates. As we sifted through the candidates, we found ourselves prizing creativity over the endless iterations of “WNT2FUCK” and “EATSH1T” plates. It takes your run-of-the-mill degenerate to think of that. It takes a kindergarten-esque comic genius to coin “MCPOO.”

Here, in alphabetical order, are the 20 funniest rejected license plate numbers in Arizona history.

Someone contact Dr. Richard Kimble. We’ve found him.

Funny license plate, but it really only makes sense if it’s paired w-

Aha! That ADOT would reject these is a true shocker.

ADOT’s list has a ton of, essentially, yo mama jokes. This one tries the least hard.

Also rejected were plates that said “12INCHS” and “9INCHES,” clearly submitted by people compensating for something. Whoever tried this one, we respect your honesty.

Why does this person need a license plate at all? Where they’re going, they don’t need roads.

We desperately searched ADOT’s list for the infamous Tobias Fünke “ANUSTART” plate from “Arrested Development,” but it was nowhere to be found. This one was close, though.

This pun accounts for one of the funniest lines in the musical “Spamalot,” and we are so sad it didn’t sneak through.

Ruh-roh.

“Hi, Blockbuster? I think I rented the wrong German U-boat movie.”

Great advice. A bit late, though.

About the friendliest “fuck you” plate someone could devise. We assume you’re supposed to hear it in a Minnesota accent.

Wringing six words out of seven characters is impressive.

If you don’t get the reference, watch this classic Orbit gum commercial from 2007. And then marvel at the irony of ADOT rejecting a plate because it referenced an ad all about replacing profanity with tamer words.