Dork King Du Bois

Catherine King channelling Cousin Itt… Ya think Jerome Du Bois’ mom was named Blanche? The PHX art-fart gadfly’s capacity for self-delusion is equal to that of Tennessee Williams’ most famous character, and like Blanche in A Streetcar Named Desire, Jerome’s creeping up there in mileage. For a while now, the…

Bess & The Bird

The wild and crazy Rachel Bess… The Bird knows all, sees all. The minions of The Bird are perched everywhere, scribbling notes, observing all social interactions in the PHX as potential fodder for the next column. Of course, it all flows through my massive bird-brain, and no boob is left…

CNA’s rage for censorship…

Banned by the CNA! Not really. There’s a ton more like this on the CNA website… Below is another e-mail from Harry Summers of the Center for Nursing Advocacy, and my response to him. Harry’s married to Sandy Summers, the executive director of the Maryland-based, self-appointed watchdog org. When he’s…

Camille Paglia, this one’s for you…

The Great Camille Paglia: Feminazi slayer, diva and intellectual nonpareil. Below find some recent correspondence between myself and the Maryland-based Center for Nursing Advocacy’s Senior SOLE Advisor Harry Jacobs Summers, hubby of Executive Director Sandy Summers. For all intents and purposes, it looks like the Summers ARE the CNA. The…

Alt-Fuels Crook Keels Over

The GrossCost of livin’: $150 mil. As far as I’m concerned, former House Speaker Jeff Groscost, whom the Bird disses in death this week, deserved to be wearing stripes, eating green baloney and wondering if he was gonna have to take it up the poot pipe from his cell-mate Randy…

The Republic’s newsroom runs red with blood…and ink.

“Good work, ZeeDick. Think we can buy the LA Slimes after this?” A source at the Republic relates the following internal scuttlebutt on Monday’s massacre, which laid waste to 31 Rep jobs, at least 7-to-8 of which were in editorial: It’s supposedly a 1% cut locally and is part of…

Manet, You Corrupt Biddy…

Somethng tells us these blokes ain’t squeezin’ lemons? All this hard-news is makin’ my brain hurt, but anything that slams our illustrious Guv, I’m down with, so here’s a taste of my colleague Sarah Fenske’s breaking story on Nappy’s monkeyshines involving student loans, the Phoenix firefighters union, Pat Cantelme, Billy…

Slaughter in the Newsroom

Now, this won’t hurt a bit… Classy how the bean-counters at Gannett picked the week of the Walter Cronkite Luncheon to hack into the Arizona Republic’s staff, cutting 31 jobs, according to VisualEditors.com. Posts to that site suggest 7 editorial bodies are headed for the morgue (read, “unemployment line”), but…

Soft-core Sexy Nurses

Irony of ironies: CNA promulgates the very images it claims to abhor… Wanna peep pics of hot, horny nurses and not feel a bit guilty about straying from your more-liberal-than-thou PC leanings? Well, spank that monkey no further than the web address for the Center for Nursing Advocacy, a politically-correct…

McCain Suicide Watch

from www.CafePress.com Can someone cue Gnarls Barkley’s “Crazy,” please? The John McCain ass-kissing began in earnest shortly after the polls closed Tuesday, with even the Repugnant’s saintly Dan Nowicki joining in on the pucker-fest by offering multiple posts on how the Manchurian Candidate will be the salvation of the Republicans…

A whiff of Weimar-era Berlin…

As DJ Squalor would say, “Don’t not be there…” I’ve never made a secret of my slavish admiration for the crew that produces the insane industrial-noise soiree known as Sadisco. I assure you, my devotion is much deserved. For three years pervy pied pipers Toby Heidebrink and Donnie Burbank have…

Blackadder, PHX-style

Richard III, the vile monarch… The real deal, though I prefer McKellen’s fascistic version… Received a delightful snot-gram today, which always warms the nest of snakes in my heart. It’s from this guy who calls himself Emil Pulsifer. I have many such missives stowed away to read when I require…

Last KR post…forever?

What the AZPunk chicks wished they looked like… Who said women stick together? If you wanna see females of the species go after each other along the lines of a prison riot on HBO’s Oz, just point out that one is better looking than the others, and watch out for…

A Real Nowhere Man

Above the Crowd: Can you feel the excitement? As the vote count in the CD5 race between Harry “Milquetoast” Mitchell and Congressman J.D. “Why Do You Hate Me?” Hayworth drags on, it seems increasingly unlikely that J.D.’s gonna pull it out of his Foghorn Leghorn ass. I hope I’m wrong,…

Wanted in Sun City: Breast Specialists

image courtesy of USDA (no, really) Who knew you needed a degree for this? Couldn’t help myself with this one. Did you know they need “lactation consultants” in Sun City? One would’ve thought the wrinkled dugs up there would be as dry as a parson. And who knew there was…

Goldwater Family Values

C.C. and Barry, Jr., dragging the Senator down to their level. The Bird takes flight this week and drops a colossal load on the Goldwater family for censoring the Goldwater papers at the Arizona Historical Foundation. Less than a week after my cover story “Goldwater Uncut,” C.C., Barry, Jr. and…

The view from Nixon’s

The Triumph of Mediocrity: “Femmebot” Manet. Has she finally gotten a man-date? I took in the election returns last night with my fellow imbibers at Nixon’s at The Esplanade, specifically with the charming Stephanie Carrico & JRC, owners of the Trunk Space gallery on Grand Avenue. Guinness and good company…

CounterCulture Crashes

Over and out for now: CCC Owners Andres and Mony Yuhnke… Sad word today that the 24-7 java joint CounterCulture Cafe at 24th Street and McDowell Road is closing its doors after their asshole landlords gave owners Andres (Dre) Yuhnke and wife Mony literally one day to amscray. Seems there…

AZPunk Pissants

KR, livin’ the life… Like you need more proof that the ‘tards at AZPunk.com are, for the most part, complete fucking, no-talent losers, obsessed with dragging down anyone who rises above their incestuous little pool of wannabes, but today there are EIGHT TEN ELEVEN TWELVE PAGES AND COUNTING of spleen…

Katie Rose Fan Club

Don’t listen to the haters, Katie… Why do the dillweeds on AZ Punk.com so despise startender, party-person & all-around hot babe Katie Rose? Is it ’cause she’s attained a level of fame that they, sitting in grubby T-shirts and eating Cheetos before ‘puter screens in their ‘rents’ basements, will never…

Lack of Vision Thing

Manet, doing what she does best: Cutting fucking ribbons. Len “Premarital” Munsil may be headed for certain defeat (picture a surfer heading into a tsunami), but the fella made an excellent point in a November 3 post to his blog about the Guv’s lack of vision and her last-minute, half-assed…

Bob Goldwater Croaks

A photo of the Bobster, from a 1977 New West article… Expect the usual, tired civic-booster blowjob-ism from most other local media on the news of Barry’s bro Bob Goldwater heading for that big pro-am golf tourney in the sky. Bob Goldwater, 96, was Sen. Barry Goldwater’s little brother, as…