The newest data is in: Burning piss and itchy bumps are on the rise in the United States -- again.
The Centers for Disease Control announced today that reported sexually transmitted diseases increased to record levels in 2008.
According to the CDC, there were 1.2 million new cases of chlamydia in the United States in 2008, up from the previous record 1.1 million in 2007.
CDC officials believe that better screening methods for the clap can account for a portion of the increase. But when it comes to other diseases -- like syphilis -- they're spreading.
About 10 years ago, the CDC believed that syphilis was nearly extinct but the disease seems to be coming back with a vengeance in recent years.
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In 2008, there were about 13,500 new cases of the disease, up from 11,500 in 2007.
We called the ASU health center to see if Sun Devils were feeling the burn (pun intended) of the increase. Nobody's gotten back to us yet, but ASU has been at the bottom of the barrel when it comes to sexual health for years.
ASU ranked 119 out of 139 schools in Trojan condoms' 2008 "Sexual Health Report Card," which is a little better than its 137th ranking in 2006.
Bottom line: Bag it up, folks.