There's good news and bad news regarding Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's "birther" posse's "investigation" into whether President Barack Obama is eligible to be president.
The good news: the investigation will be finished by early next year, so Arpaio's team will soon be able to tackle other non-existent issues like illegal unicorn races, and underground leprechaun fight clubs.
The bad news: Arpaio, the elected leader of one of the largest law enforcement agencies in the country, is still using MCSO resources to "investigate" a continuously debunked conspiracy theory.
As you probably know, Arpaio agreed last month to launch an investigation into whether Obama is eligible to be president.
Now, America's self-proclaimed "toughest sheriff" has some
fresh bullshit good news for the "birther" crowd: "there could be a shock" when the sheriff's "birther" posse finishes its investigation into Obama.
(Pause for uncontrollable laughter)
"I can't tell you everything, but there could be a shock there somewhere that my guys came up with. I can't talk too much about it. It's in the process," Arpaio told members of the Arizona Tea Party Tuesday night.
Arpaio then referenced Obama's Social Security number, noting that "there are a couple of things you and nobody else here knows anything about yet that could be a little bit exciting."
See video below.
We asked the Sheriff's Office if someone could please elaborate on the "birther" posse's "shocking" findings. Believe it or not, nobody on the sheriff's PR detail wanted to chat with New Times about the "birther" issue.
Arpaio, however, gave an exclusive "birther" interview to WorldNetDaily whackjob Jerome Corsi, during which the sheriff explained that the posse tasked with proving the "birther" conspiracy theory consists of "three former law enforcement officers and two retired attorneys with law enforcement experience. Members have been examining evidence since September concerning Obama's eligibility to be president under Article 2, Section 1 of the Constitution, which requires a president to be a natural-born citizen."
According to Arpaio, the "investigation" should be completed by early next year -- if you're expecting to be "shocked" by the findings, don't hold your breath.
Keep Phoenix New Times Free... Since we started Phoenix New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Phoenix with no paywalls.