Feathered Bastard

Joe Arpaio's B-Day Wish? Your Money, Of Course

He's raped public coffers, cost taxpayers tens of millions to pay for the lawsuits resulting from his malfeasance, swiped $100 million from voter protected funds for his pet projects, and now he wants the county to fork over more millions to appeal a federal judge's finding that his office has engaged in rampant racial profiling against Latinos.

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Naturally, I'm talking about Maricopa County's own Sheriff Joe Arpaio, who turns 81 tomorrow, just as lawyers from both sides in Melendres v. Arpaio meet before U.S. District Court Judge G. Murray Snow to figure out how reform the MCSO and rid it of its prejudiced ways.

So what does the biggest bigot in law enforcement want for his b-day? A cake with a burning cross in the center? A new sheet? Some toothless sandbillies on motorcycles to serenade him with their rendition of "Sweet Home Alabama"?

Nah, he wants your money.

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Stephen is a former staff writer and columnist at Phoenix New Times.
Contact: Stephen Lemons