The campaign for Glendale mayor is getting really heated, folks -- candidate Manny Cruz released a video of his opponent, Republican state Representative Jerry Weiers, moving a planter at the state capitol.
It's actually a really big planter -- Weiers had to tie it to his truck to move it -- and Cruz describes Weiers' moving of the planter in March as a "criminal act" he committed in a "fit of rage."
This is such a big deal, apparently, that former Democratic gubernatorial candidate Terry Goddard appeared alongside Cruz as Cruz held a press conference on the matter.
According to Cruz's campaign manager, Weiers did this because he really wanted to park his motorcycle where that planter was. These planters apparently cost $600 a pop, and six of them were purchased for "security reasons," according to Cruz's campaign.
While Cruz's campaign alleges this is property damage -- and notes that a forklift had to be brought in to put the planter back over Weiers' motorcycle-parking station -- Weiers probably won't be getting in trouble.
A press release from Cruz's campaign says the cops aren't looking into it, and it's up to House Speaker Andy Tobin to deal with it.
Naturally, some Dems are in a tizzy about this, and as usual, House Minority Leader Chad Campbell issued a statement to drop in his two cents.
"There are so many things wrong with this scenario, it is difficult to decide where to start," Campbell says. "For starters though, it begs the question - what is going on at the Arizona House of Representatives? A sitting representative breached protocol and potentially damaged taxpayer property, and we have to learn about it because he was caught on a security tape that was uncovered by his political opponent? What did Speaker Tobin know about this and what, if anything, was done to rectify the situation and hold Rep. Weiers accountable?"
Campbell also wants to know if taxpayers had to pay for the forklift to remedy "what amounts to a grown man's temper tantrum."
Weiers' response is an instant classic, undoubtedly written by public-relations hotshot Jason Rose:
Now that Manuel Cruz has wasted government resources and the public's time looking into the movements of a potted plant, candidate for Glendale Mayor Jerry Weiers is considering calling for an investigation of Manuel Cruz on equally disturbing allegations.
Manuel Cruz is a known pedestrian. People have seen him walking on real intersections. Has he ever jaywalked across 17th Avenue at the State Capitol? Weiers may be be asking for all video and photo surveillance available at the State Capital to resolve this burning issue. It's only fair since the Cruz campaign spent weeks asking the DPS for video of a moving potted plant.
Sources have told us that Cruz has a library card. Does he have any overdue books? Did he fail to return a book on time in the past? The people have a right to know.
Back in the 80's and 90's Cruz likely rented videos. Did he always rewind? Did the copy of Moonstruck he rented in 1991 arrive back at Blockbuster properly rewound, or did the poor soul who rented it after Cruz have to waste five minutes before seeing Cher's Oscar winning performance?
Other issues that may bear investigation
- Mattress tag removal
- Failure to return the grocery store cart to its proper location
- Grass clippings in the recycle barrel
- Coupon abuse
Since none of this is a scandal, let's sit back, relax, and watch ABC 15's report on the matter -- which includes the surveillance footage, as well as Jason Rose talking about spitting and jaywalking:
